


A Beautiful Reflection From Firework Eyes

by ElephantCactus



Series: The Idyllic Sorrows of Our Lives [2]
Category: All Time Low (Band), Bring Me The Horizon, Memphis May Fire, My Chemical Romance, Pierce the Veil, Sleeping With Sirens
Genre: Alternate Universe, Blood and Injury, Dystopia, Everyone Is Gay, Everyone Needs A Hug, I Made Myself Cry, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Possible Character Death, Roommates, Superpowers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-22
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:13:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 61
Words: 50,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26047819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElephantCactus/pseuds/ElephantCactus
Summary: It's been over a year since Vic Fuentes has seen the sky. As a teen with superpowers, he's been locked away in the Facility, never again to see the light of day. After the last escape didn't go well, he's lost hope in trying again. At least until he gets a new roommate, Kellin Quinn.*This is listed as the second part of a series, but there are no spoilers for the first book if you haven't read it*© 2020 ElephantCactus.  All rights reserved.
Relationships: Frank Iero/Gerard Way, Jack Barakat/Alex Gaskarth, Vic Fuentes/Kellin Quinn
Series: The Idyllic Sorrows of Our Lives [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1923076
Comments: 12
Kudos: 31





	1. A Beautiful Reflection From Firework Eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello fellas, I've been kidnapped by aliens and am being forced to write this. If you can send help, please do.
> 
> Anyway, please enjoy. Feel free to leave comments and kudos! It would mean a lot to me if you did. This is also on Wattpad under the same name. (There is a sequel, by the way. Don't worry)

_(Three months later)_

I barely even register gunshots through the pain that crashes through me. Someone screams—the sound ringing out over the crackling of flames. I think it might have been me, but I’m not certain from the way the world is tilting around me. One moment I’m standing, my hands outstretched before me, the flames roaring around me. The next, I’m falling, unable to stand up as the world spins in every direction. I’m on the ground before I know it, my face pressed against the wet grass as I’m gasping for breath, pain filling my lungs, a burning sensation spreading through my shoulder and side as dark blood pools beneath me. My shirt’s completely soaked in blood—I’m bleeding a lot—too much actually, my life leaking out over my hands. I cough, warm wetness splattering against my face as I struggle to breathe in again, but it’s like inhaling needles—the pain is too much. 

The flames cracking around me go out, letting the darkness rush in. Cold air rushes against my face as the footsteps come nearer, the shouts as the guards come to finish me off growing louder. But I don’t care about it. All I care about is the boy in front of me, struggling to get to me, tears rolling down his cheeks as he screams my name. 

My heart breaks a little bit more, but I can’t look away as I touch two fingers to my lips, our sign for _I love you _. It’s what got me through so many days, and hopefully, it’ll get him through the more that await him. He does the same, not taking his eyes off of me, though I silently beg him to. Look away, I want to tell him. It’ll be easier. I don’t want him to see me like this. But he doesn’t, his gaze remaining fixed on mine until he’s unable to anymore.__

____

As the boy disappears, taken away from me to safety, my mind wanders as the guards near, and my life leaks out before me. It’s quite a beautiful day in early spring, now that I think about it, the air is chilly but not quite cold, a nice crispness to it, the sun’s rays just visible over the horizon. It’s not a terrible day to die. If it were any other day, I’d be waking up just about now, in the small room I had, and he’d be there, smiling at me like he did every morning. At least I’ll be able to see the sky before I’m gone. 

____

I think I’m going to die. The realization isn’t as terrifying as I thought it would be. Maybe because I’ve always known, deep down, that I wasn’t going to make it out alive. Ever since the first time I tried to escape and how wrong that went, I resigned myself to the fact that I was going to die here. Then he came along, and I found hope. I had to find a way to escape for him. But since the plan went wrong, I knew that there was no way we were going to survive this, if I didn’t do something. 

____

It’s harder to breathe now, the lack of oxygen making my head pound. My heartbeat thrums in my ears, each beat quieter than the last as I slowly slip away into the darkness, the lightening sky and pine trees fading away into the gray. My eyes slowly flicker shut as the voices come nearer, the noises fading away into the background. Hands roughly grab me, turning me over. Something slips over my face, and I hear a loud beeping noise nearby, and agony floods through me as something presses against my side. I would scream if I could, but I’m too exhausted, too weak to do so as the darkness slips over my eyelids, and I’m gone. 

____

Maybe one day I’ll see him again. Maybe someday. Maybe in a different life where we don’t know each other. Maybe in a world not as cruel as this one—one where we can be together. 

____

I want to tell him that I’m so sorry. That I’m truly sorry for leaving him. I know what it feels like to lose someone I love. I’m sorry that I will put him through the pain. But I don’t regret my choice. 

____

Cause he will be alive and safe. That’s all that matters to me.

____


	2. I’ve Been Up Here So Long, I’m Going Crazy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The aliens said I had to upload chapter two today so here you go.

_(Now)_

Every day is the same. It has been, at least for the last few months. Same gray walls, same gray metal bed frames nailed into the wall. Same rough cement gray ground. Same heavy iron bolted door, same frosted window. Same flickering light bulbs. Same lingering damp smell. I trace my fingers over the ridges in the cement, doing what I do every day. There’s not much else to keep me occupied. Not anymore, at least. 

There are at least a few others here. I don’t know much about them—I’ve never seen them. All I’ve heard is their screams. I wonder what they’re like. Some days, when there’s nothing to do, I imagine what they’re like. Maybe they’re like me, teenagers trapped here alone. Maybe one of them was rich, had a mansion and a private plane. Or maybe they were like me, dragged off the streets, dropped here, and left alone. 

I stand up, pacing back and forth across the small room. Once in a while, they give us books or puzzles or something to do, but right now, I don’t have anything. There are two twin beds in my room—the one on the right has been unused for a few months at this point. It still hurts to look at it. A few gray towels hang on a rack next to the door, a few water bottles balanced on a small ledge jutting out beside them. There are quite a few hiding places that the guards haven’t found yet. We used to stash small things there, a first aid kit, a pencil, a few loose sheets of paper, a rubber ball. If I had a marker, I would draw over the plain gray walls, maybe put tally marks like they do in prison. At least it would give me something to do other than stare at the lonely gray walls all day. 

I’m honestly surprised I haven’t lost my mind yet. Maybe I have, and I just can’t tell. I used to dream of colors. Vibrant reds and blues. Luscious green trees and beautiful stretching skies. But now it’s as if the gray has leaked even into my unconsciousness. All I can dream of are the four gray walls that surround me every day. And the orange and red flames burning everything down. At least they’re colorful. 

The buzzer sounds and I look up in surprise from where I’m sitting on my bed, my head in my hands. It’s too early for meals. Usually, they don’t come for me this early. My time slot is later in the day. But I jump to my feet all the same, just as the door swings open and a boy is pushed in. 

He lands on his knees on the floor, his dark hair falling across his face. He’s dressed in the same uniform I am—a blue t-shirt and blue shorts, a dark number printed across the back. He’s shaking—terrified, I assume. I was too when I was new. 

“Subject M-37, subject M-49 will be sharing this room with you,” the guard says. He doesn’t give me any time to respond before slamming the door shut and sliding the heavy lock into place. I stare at the new boy in shock before I shake my head, snapping myself out of my daze. I guess it was about time for me to get a new roommate. After Jaime—I shake my head again. I can’t think about that right now. Not when there’s a new boy who might need me. 

I drop to my knees next to the new boy, reaching out to touch his shoulder. “Are you okay?” My voice is a bit hoarse from not speaking for over a day.  
He flinches from my touch, looking up at me. “Yeah,” he says. His voice is soft and shaking slightly as he brushes his hair away from his face.  
“I’m not gonna hurt you,” I say, holding my hand out to him. “I’m Vic.”  
“I’m Kellin,” he says, taking my outstretched hand, a smile flickering onto his lips for a moment before it slips away.


	3. I Spend Everyday In Captivity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All I can think about is that one vine that goes "Oooh they were roommates" lol.
> 
> Anyway chapter three! Let's go.

“So what is this place?” Kellin asks, leaning against the wall from his bed. We’ve been talking for a bit—there’s not much else to do. I’ve mainly gotten over the shock of seeing another person in the room—another living, breathing thing. I have to admit, the company is nice. I’m not used to seeing another person in this room, not since Jaime, but it’s nice nonetheless.  
“They didn’t tell you?” I ask, shocked. They gave me the whole rundown speech when they brought me in.  
He shakes his head. “They kinda just dropped me off here,” he mumbles.  
“It’s a research containment facility,” I explain. “Basically, they test our powers and hide us from the world.”  
“Ah, makes sense,” he says.  
“How’d you get caught?” I ask.  
“I didn’t. My parents called me in.” He says.  
My eyes widen at his words. His parents called him in? They would do that, to their own son? My parents tried to hide me, and when they couldn’t, they helped me run away. It wasn’t any use in the end, but at least they tried. “I’m sorry,” I say.  
“It’s okay,” he mumbles. “So how long have you been here?”  
“A year? Maybe longer. I’ve lost track of time,” I say gloomily. I can tell he’s shocked by my answer.  
“Do you ever think we’ll get out of here?” He asks at last.  
“I hope so,” I breathe out. I really do, though at this point, I know we're never escaping, not after what happened last time. There’s no point in trying anymore. 

The buzzer sounds again, and Kellin jumps, startled. I don’t react though, just slide off my bed and walk toward the door. On cue, the door opens and in slides two trays. I’m startled when I see two of them, then remember. I have a roommate now. The thought makes me smile as I pick them up. 

“Food,” I say in a way of explanation. Kellin hesitates before he slides off his bed, sitting next to me on the floor cross-legged. 

He wrinkles his nose as he uncovers the tray. I can’t help but laugh at his reaction.  
“It’s pretty disgusting,” I admit, uncovering my own bowl of gray mush.  
“It smells like glue,” he says, picking up the plastic spoon.  
“Doesn’t taste much better,” I say, picking up my own. 

We sit in silence for a few moments. I can’t help but watch him. It’s strange having another person, I have to admit. I’m not quite used to sharing my space anymore, but I’ll adjust. He seems nice— he’s pretty quiet, though. He notices me staring and blushes, a hint of red appearing on his pale skin.  
“So how old are you?” I ask, breaking the silence.  
“Sixteen,” Kellin says, stirring the mush in his bowl around. He’s a year younger than me, at least if I counted the days correctly.  
“I’m seventeen,” I say. “I think at least. It’s hard to keep track of the days.”  
“Have you had a roommate before?” Kellin asks.  
I look down at my tray, a sinking feeling in my stomach. “Yeah.” My voice is quiet. I don’t want to talk about this now—especially not with him since he’s new. The worst thing I can do is scare him right now.  
“What happened to him?” Kellin asks.  
I struggle to keep the memories in check. “Nothing,” I mutter. But it really wasn’t nothing, was it? It’s easier than saying the words out loud.  
Kellin seems to take the hint and drops his gaze too. 

The buzzer rings again, and Kellin looks up, startled.  
“What is it this time?”  
“You’re in luck,” I say. “We have the day off from studies and practice.”  
“Then what’s the buzzer for?”  
I grab the stiff gray towels from being bleached one too many times from the rack, throwing one to him. He catches it, a look of surprise on his face. “Showers.”


	4. I Hope You Never Have To Go Through This Hell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there. Hope y'all have had a good time so far. I'll be updating this pretty frequently, maybe a few times a week? Who knows.
> 
> Also new character introduction! Who do you think it is?

Kellin follows me down the hallway as the guard swings the door open. I can see his eyes flicking around, examining the white walls, taking in the rooms around us. The kitchens and a few offices are located on this floor and not much else. As usual, a few guards are patrolling the hallways, guns and batons hanging by their sides. I catch sight of a brown-haired boy standing in one of the empty rooms, but he's whisked away by a guard before I can get a good look. 

The door to the showers sticks, so I have to shove it with my shoulder to get it to open. I stumble into the room, holding open the door for Kellin to slip in. 

There are two shower stalls in the bathroom, flimsy cheap white curtains hanging in front of them. It would have been a private place, except for the fact that the rings are nearly torn off, the curtains barely blocking the shower. 

The door slams shut behind us, the sound echoing through the room. 

“Here.” I hand him his fresh uniform from the shelf on the wall and a bar of soap before taking mine. My familiar number stares back at me. “Don’t take too long. The timer shuts off after five minutes. If we're lucky, there might still be hot water.” 

I head toward the shower stall on the right, looking behind me to see Kellin standing there, not moving. 

“You okay?” I call.   
“Yeah,” he snaps out of his daze, going toward the second stall. “Guess I’m still adjusting.”  
I give him a sympathetic glance. “I get that.” 

The curtain screeches as I pull it shut. I strip out of my dirty uniform, piling it on the bench beside me. The showerhead sputters as I crank the handle all the way to the right, a thin stream of water leaking out. I gasp as the ice-cold water bites my skin. I can hear Kellin do the same from the stall over. The shower sucks, but it’s better than nothing. The timer clicks away as I scrub down, my teeth chattering as I do so. I’m shivering by the time I step out from under the cold water and dry myself off. The water from my hair drips into my fresh uniform as I lace up my sneakers and step out from the stall. 

Kellin’s still in his stall as I dump my old uniform into the bin in the corner. I partially can see him through the curtain and turn away, my face heating up. I run my fingers through my tangled hair, as I wait for him to be finished, trying to comb it the best I can. 

I hear a gasp behind me and whirl around, letting out a yelp of surprise when I see it. 

There’s a brown-haired boy standing in the doorway. I stare at him, and he stares back at me, shock etched on his face. I can see from the number, M-16 printed across his back and the same blue uniform he’s dressed in that he’s one of us. I can only stare at him, speechless at the fact I’m standing face to face with another one of us. Then, not knowing why I do so, I lift up my hand in a wave, letting a spark appear on my fingertips, ignoring how cold I am. When he sees the small flame, he smiles before he disappears around the corner just as the guard walks in.


	5. I’m The Killer Who Burned Your Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of backstory for y'all :)

_(One year ago)_

They’re coming for me, and I know it. I curse myself for being so stupid. How could I? It was just one stupid comment made by one stupid kid, and I lost control. I couldn’t stop myself from showing them what a freak I actually was. Well, now I’m paying for it. Cause they’re after me and I’m running out of time. I pace across my room, hearing Mama and Papa yelling downstairs.

“They’re coming, aren’t they?” That’s Mama. “What do we do?”

“What is there to do?” Papa asks. “They’ll take him.”

“How long do we have?” Mike, my little brother, asks.

“Maybe an hour? We might be able to disappear if we leave now.” Finally, I can’t take it anymore. I reach under my bed, pulling out the backpack. I’ve been preparing for this day for so long. I knew that they would eventually find out and I would have to run. The cans clink together as I sling my backpack over my shoulder, taking one last look around my room. This might be the last time I ever see it. I take a deep breath, shutting the door behind me. I run to the landing, looking down at them. Mama and Papa look up at me.

“Don’t, okay?” I say, my voice shaking. “I’m going to go.”

“Don’t be crazy, Vic,” Papa says. “We’re not letting you leave alone.”

“You have to,” I say. “I’m the one they’re after. Not you.”

“No,” Mama says, but I cut her off.

“What are you going to do?” I ask. “They’re almost here.” As if summoned, I hear tires crunch on the gravel outside. There’s a knock at the front door, the sound making my heart pound.

Everyone freezes as the knock sounds again, louder, more persistent this time.

“Open the door!” A voice shouts. “This is the police!”

“I have to go,” I whisper, backing up. “They’re gonna catch me if I don’t.”

Papa looks torn, but he pulls me closer, pressing a kiss to my forehead. “Stay strong, okay? We’ll hold them off.”

Mama hugs me. She smells of lavender like she always does. I breathe in the familiar scent, knowing this might be the last time I ever see them. “Good luck,” she whispers. “We love you. We will see you again. This is not goodbye.”

Mike follows me to the backdoor as I hastily unlock it, stepping out into the sunlight. “Don’t let them catch you, okay?” Mike says. “Just keep going. Stay strong. Promise me. I’ll see you again.”

I pull him in, hugging my little brother. “I will.”

“You have no right to take our son from us!” Papa yells at the officer.

“Sir, we can and we will. He is a danger to everyone.” The officer tries to push past but is blocked by Papa.

I take off into the night before they can see me. Tears run down my cheeks, but I brush them away as I slip into the forest, running into the night.

_Little did I know that was the last time I ever saw them._

A few weeks later, I head back to the house. I scan my surroundings as I near it, stopping in surprise at the edge of the forest. The house is deserted, the doors boarded up, windows smashed. I twist the knob, surprised to find it unlocked and walk in as if I were in a trance. Everything was just as I had left it. A pot sat on the stove, something half-cooked inside. Books lay open on the tables. “Mama?” I call. “Papa? Mike?”

There’s no response, just the eerie whistling of the wind through the drapes. They’re gone. There is no trace of a struggle, no sign of blood. It’s as if they’ve just disappeared, almost as if they were never here.

I kneel down in the empty living room, tears rolling down my cheeks as I look around one last time. They are gone. I’m truly all alone now.


	6. Feels Like We’re Caged Animals

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is kinda a short update, sorry. Just some more information on the characters. 
> 
> Next chapter will be longer and introduces another new character (again lol). Any guesses on who it will be?
> 
> Till then, see ya!

The lights in our room go off at the next buzzer, plunging us mostly into darkness. It’s an earlier lights out than usual, but that just means that we’re gonna have the early shift tomorrow. 

“What are they going to do?” Kellin asks. I hear the bed creak as he shifts.  
I wince. I remember the first time they took me to study and how scared I was. “They just want to test your powers and see what you can do.”  
“What is your power?” he asks. “You haven’t told me yet.”  
“Well,” I sit up, looking toward him in the dark. “We’re not supposed to use them outside of study, but,” I hold out my hand in front of me, fingers outstretched. It doesn’t take much effort for me to coax a small flame into life—my powers have never taken much for me to control them. Our room is bathed in a soft orange glow—I have to admit that it is impressive.

“That’s amazing,” he breathes as I flick my hand, extinguishing the flame.  
“Yeah,” I’m strangely embarrassed. “What’s your power?”  
“I can’t show you,” he admits. “It doesn’t really work like that.”  
“Well, what can you do?” I prompt.  
“It’s not cool like yours,” he says. “I can heal.”  
“That’s cool,” I say. “Just yourself or others?”  
“I don’t know,” he admits. “I’ve only used it once, when...” he trails off. I realize he must be thinking about how he got sent here.  
“Hey,” I say. “Don’t think about it, okay?”  
“I’m just scared,” Kellin sighs. “Are they gonna hurt me?”  
“They usually don’t,” I say. “Only if we disobey them or aren’t able to use our powers well enough.”  
“That seems counterintuitive,” Kellin says.  
I shrug. “Something about how fear and anger make our powers stronger. It’s linked to emotion. Or that’s what they told me at least.”  
Kellin is silent for a moment, and I worry I’ve scared him. “Don’t worry. It will be fine.”  
“You think?” He looks skeptical.  
“You’re gonna be okay.” The words leave a bad taste in my mouth. As soon as I say it, my stomach twists. His powers are healing. The realization makes me sick. How are they going to test his powers? Are they going to hurt him? Hurt someone else to make him heal them? The thought of Kellin getting injured sends pangs of guilt through me. How long is he going to last here? How long will it take before they break him? Admittedly, I don’t know him that well yet, but I feel responsible for him, at least in some way. I don’t think I can watch another person die.


	7. Show Me The Way Back Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some more backstory and a new character for y'all.

_(One year ago)_

It had been raining for so long I had forgotten what the blue sky looked like. If it were anywhere else, I probably would have frozen to death. Luckily, in Southern California, the temperature this week never dropped below 60 degrees.

I know I’m being careless, letting my hands go up in flames whenever I feel like it. But I don’t care anymore. Let someone call them. 

It’s as if finding my empty house took the energy out of me. I drag myself through every day, not much fueling me as I wander from abandoned warehouse to bridge. What kept me going before was the hope that I’d find Mama and Papa and Mike, and we’d be together. But now they’re gone, and I’m alone. 

I don’t even try to make a feeble effort to run as the cop car screeches to a stop in front of me. I throw up my hand to block the light, but I don’t move. 

“Hands out in front where I can see them,” the officer says as he aims his gun at me. If it were two months ago, I probably would’ve run. I would’ve put up a fight, burned a few things to the ground before I’d let them take me. But I can’t bring myself to. Some part of me reasons that at least I’ll have a roof over my head. I’ll have food and water, a permanent place to stay. I almost laugh to myself. How fast I broke my promise to Mike and Mama and Papa. But if they were in my position, wouldn’t they do the same? I’m just so tired. So tired of running and surviving. 

There’s no noise except for the clinking of keys and the rumble of engines. The handcuffs dig uncomfortably into my wrists as the van jolts. I don’t bother to see where I’m headed—the windows are blacked out. There’s an officer across from me and one by the door. Both of them have guns trained on me, though it’s not like I’m going to try to escape. If I was, I would’ve fought earlier. 

I don’t even struggle as they put a bag over my head, letting them lead me out into who knows where. I’m resigned to my fate at this point. Wherever I’m going can’t be worse than living on the streets, scrounging for food, right?

I blink as the bag is pulled off my head, squinting around the room I’m in. The walls are painted white—blindingly white, fluorescent lights, making it only worse. 

“I’m Mr. Styles,” the man says, kneeling down in front of me. “I’m kind of the manager around here.”

“Stand up,” he instructs. I stand up slowly, looking at him apprehensively. “So we have a few rules here,” he says. “Firstly, your name is M-37.”  
The words feel like a slap to the face. M-37. I don’t have a name anymore—just a number. It leaves a bitter taste in my mouth, but I nod.  
“Secondly, and most importantly, no using your powers outside of Study.”  
“Study?” I ask, my voice quiet.  
“You’re here because we’re studying your powers. All you need to do is follow our rules. That brings me to our third and final rule,” Mr. Styles tips his head. “Follow the instructions of the guards and scientists. If you do not, there will be consequences. Bad ones.” The warning in his voice sends a shiver down my spine. “Does that make sense?” he asks.  
I nod silently. Inwardly, I make a promise not to disobey him. I don’t intend to find out what these consequences will be.  
“Good.” He says. He hands me a set of clothes—a blue t-shirt and shorts with a number—my number printed across them. “Get changed, and we’ll bring you to your room.”

I’m led through the hallway. The clothes are a bit baggy on me, but they fit well enough. I hear a scream echoing from upstairs and tense, but I’m shoved forward until we stop at a door with a five painted on it. 

“Here you go,” the guard says, unlocking it and shoving me roughly forward. I stumble into the room. I would’ve fallen to the ground, if not for the boy who catches me before I do so. 

“Subject M-26, your new roommate, subject M-37,” the guard says carelessly before the door slams shut, making me tense. I can hear the lock sliding shut and the footsteps fading away before I finally let out the breath I’ve been holding. 

“Are you okay?” the boy asks from where he’s been holding me up.  
I push away from him, my cheeks heating up. “Yes,” I mumble.  
“I’m Jaime. I have electricity powers,” he says. I look at him, startled. I thought we had to use the numbers. He seems to guess what I’m thinking because he shrugs. “No need to use those stupid numbers. We’re people. Not machines.”  
“I’m Vic,” I say. It feels good to say my name out loud instead of a number. “Fire.”  
“Welcome to the Facility,” Jaime says. He sees my expression because a look of pity comes over his face. “You’re going to be okay,” he reassured me. And the thing is, I almost believe him.


	8. Pull Me Under, Wake Me Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A tad bit cliche, but whatever :)

Kellin has nightmares. I wake up to the sound of a scream from the other side of the room. I slip out of my bed, the air cold against my skin as I tiptoe over to his bed. The room is faintly illuminated by the lights from the hallway seeping under the door. It’s enough for me to see him struggling against some unseen enemy, his face drawn with pain. 

I shake his shoulder. “Kellin,” I whisper. He doesn’t wake, just shifts away from me.   
“Stop it,” he cries. “No—Dad don’t—” my stomach drops at the sound of his words. No—his father?   
“Kellin,” I say louder. He still doesn’t respond, still struggling against something—his father.  
He lets out a scream, thrashing even more, and I curse silently to myself. At this point, he’s gonna hurt himself if he doesn’t wake up. 

I contemplate for a moment before I climb up onto the bed beside him. I try to restrain him the best I can, but I eventually give up, opting to climb on top of him instead, pinning him down. I hold his wrists down as he fights against me. Kellin’s eyes snap open, but he’s not fully awake yet—he’s still struggling against me. “Kellin,” I say again. “Kellin, wake up.” He still doesn’t, and I glance around desperately. What am I going to do now? If the guards hear him—I don’t even want to think about what they might do. 

I shake him again, but he still doesn’t respond—fighting against me harder. I curse to myself again as I shift my position, holding both his wrists down with one hand while I slap him across the face with my free one. 

The sound rings out across the room, and I wince, knowing how he must feel about me now. At least it seems to do the trick. Kellin stops struggling, going slack in my grasp. He blinks a few times, glancing up at me. I can see the imprint of my hand on his cheek, even in the dim light.   
“I’m so sorry,” I say, mortified. “I didn’t mean to hit you—you just weren’t waking up.”   
“It’s okay,” he murmurs. “I’m sorry.”   
“Don’t be,” I try to comfort him. “It’s fine.” I realize how much he’s blushing. I snap to my senses, realizing I’m still sitting on top of him. Wow, this is embarrassing. My face heats up as he looks away from me.“Oh—I’m sorry,” I mutter as I shift off of him, so I’m sitting on the side of his bed instead.  
“I should’ve told you,” Kellin whispers. “I-I have nightmares a lot.”   
“That’s okay,” I say kindly.  
“I woke you up, didn’t I?” he asks.   
“I wasn’t asleep yet,” I lie.  
“Liar,” he mutters. 

I roll my eyes, reaching over to brush his hair out of his face. He freezes as I do, but doesn’t move away, letting me tuck the strand of dark hair behind his ear, my fingers brushing against his cheek.   
“Do you want to talk about it?” I ask softly.  
He stares at me, his eyes wide. “What did you hear?” he asks, his voice shaking.  
“You were screaming at your father,” I say softly.   
Kellin freezes, staring at me.  
“You don’t have to tell me,” I look away, my face heating up.   
“I’m sorry,” he whispers at last.  
“You don’t have any reason to be.”  
He just shakes his head. “I’m going to try to get some sleep.”  
“I’m here if you need me,” I call as I head back to my side of the room.   
I hear the blankets rustling before he whispers, “thank you,” so quietly, I almost don’t hear him.


	9. Sometimes You Gotta Fall Before You Fly

I squint against the lights as I stand in the center of the room. The contraptions strapped onto my wrists are uncomfortable, the plastic digging into my skin, but I don’t complain. Complaining makes it worse. 

The walls here are painted white, making the bright fluorescent lights reflect back at me. Glass surrounds the back wall, cameras focused on me from every angle. I feel like I’m in a glass fishbowl, being watched by curious kids tapping on the glass. I shift uncomfortably as I catch sight of Mr. Styles and a few scientists standing behind me, staring at a few screens, talking to each other. 

“M-37, go.” The voice blares from the speakers. I obediently turn toward the back wall, holding my hands out in front of me. Instinctively, my mind goes to Kellin. What’s he doing right now? Is he scared? I wonder what they are doing to him. 

The flames flicker in my hands as I close my eyes, concentrating. Heat blasts my skin, though it doesn’t hurt. To anyone else, they’d probably be screaming with pain, but the flames merely tickle as they crawl up my arms, licking at my clothing but leaving it untouched. 

The pile of wood to my left goes up in a burst of flames, crackling and smoldering. I can’t help but grin as the one in front of me does the same. The sensors are beeping behind me as I focus on the last one, holding my hands out in front of me. I’m exhausted—the little sleep I got last night isn’t helping, but I force myself to concentrate, gritting my teeth through the pain. The last pile explodes, wood raining down around me as a fire roars in its place. 

I let my hands drop to my side as my head spins. I nearly pitch forward, but somehow I manage to stay upright.   
“Good work,” Mr. Styles says, entering the room. I look up at him, wiping the sweat and charcoal from my forehead. “You’ve been improving.”  
“Thanks,” I say. I guess I have been improving, but it’s hard to tell.   
“We’re glad to see you’ve been feeling back to normal,” he says. I flinch at his words, the memories threatening to overwhelm me again. “How is everything with your roommate, M-49?”

M-49? Oh, right. That’s Kellin’s number. I guess I’ll never quite get used to hearing the numbers, though I’ve gotten so used to mine. The way he says it still makes disgust stir in my stomach. They won’t even call us by our names. Just a number, as if we’re animals. 

“Everything’s good,” I reply quietly.  
“Great to hear that. We hoped it might bring your spirits up.” Anger flares in me as I clench my fists. As if a roommate is just a toy to cheer me up. A replacement for what they did. I force myself to breath and unclench my fists. It won’t do me any good to lose control. 

I let the officer lead me back to my room, though it’s not like I need him too—I could find my way back if I were blindfolded. I glance around my room, disappointment filling me as I realize Kellin’s not back yet. It’s strange, I have to admit. I’d gotten so used to being alone, but now I had Kellin. Sometimes, I have to pinch myself to make sure I’m awake and that he’s actually here, not a figment of my imagination or part of my insanity. 

I only have a few minutes of silence before the door is opened, and Kellin is shoved roughly inside, his shirt covered in blood.


	10. Come At Me With Everything You’ve Got

There’s dark blood flowing from a nasty gash across his cheek. I can see bruises littered across his arms, disappearing under the sleeve of his blood-soaked blue t-shirt.   
“What the hell happened to you?” I ask as I help him to his feet.   
“I couldn’t use them,” he manages to get out as I lead him toward his bed. “I just couldn’t.”  
I help him sit down as he lets out a grunt of pain. “Just relax,” I instruct as I cross the room, reaching for the first aid kit and a water bottle. The bed creaks as I sit down beside him. 

“Can you take off your shirt?” I ask him, knowing he must be in pain.   
“I think so,” he says. It takes a few tries for him to, but he finally manages to strip off the blood-soaked fabric. 

I gasp as the light hits his bare skin. His injuries are worse than I thought they were. Purplish black bruises are littered across his chest, possibly worse than the ones across his arms. A gash runs from his collar bone down to the bottom of his rib cage, another one running along the side of his arm.   
“Damn,” I mutter as I examine the cuts. They’re deep. I wouldn’t be surprised if he needed stitches.  
“That bad?” he lets out a short laugh, wincing as he does so.   
“This is gonna sting,” I warn him as I rip open the package, the smell of antiseptic filling the air.   
He eyes me cautiously. “You don’t have to,” he says. “I’ve had worse.”  
My body goes cold. “Worse?” I ask. He looks pretty damn bad right now, long slashes carved into his skin. “Kellin, what do you mean?” Last night flashes into my mind, the way he screamed at his father, and my stomach drops.  
Kellin’s eyes flicker away as he refuses to meet my gaze. “Nothing,” he whispers. “Let’s just get this over with.” I know he’s avoiding my question, but I let him brush it aside for now as I get to work tending to his wounds. 

He lets out a hiss of pain as I run the wipe along the gashes. They’re soaked in blood in an instant. “Ow,” he mutters, trying to squirm away from me.   
“Sit still,” I scold him as I grab a towel, pressing it against the cuts. Hopefully, that’ll stop most of the bleeding. He gasps, his face pale and drawn up in pain.   
“I’m fine,” he tries to move away from me, but I climb onto the bed, pinning him down beneath me.   
“No, you’re not. You’re literally bleeding out. Shut up and sit still.” At that, he finally does, watching me as I bandage his wounds best I can. It’s not good, but hopefully, it’ll work until his powers kick in.   
“Can you get off of me now?” He whispers, and I instantly feel guilty.   
“Sorry,” I mutter, climbing off of him. I move to go toward my bed, but he suddenly grabs my wrist.   
“No, uh,” his face flushes. “Could you—uh stay with me? I just—don’t want to be alone.”  
“Of course.” I’m startled, but I’m glad he trusts me. 

He shifts over, giving me enough space to lie down next to him. He rests his head against my shoulder, and I gingerly rest my arm over his chest, careful to avoid the cuts. 

We sit in silence, me absentmindedly rubbing his shoulders as he leans against me. The buzzer goes off, followed by a click as we’re left in mostly darkness, the only light flooding from the hallway. 

“How did this even happen?” I ask.   
“I couldn’t reach them,” Kellin murmurs. “They tried to make me use my powers, but I couldn’t. I just couldn’t.” He sounds so frustrated. “They kept hurting me, but I still couldn’t reach them.”  
“It’s okay,” I whisper to him as I trace circles on his shoulders, trying to calm him down. “You’re going to be okay.”  
“You think so?” he whispers, his eyes closed.  
“I’ll make sure of it.” It seems to work. He relaxes, leaning against me. Finally, his breathing evens out, and I can tell he’s fallen asleep. I gently untangle myself from him, heading back toward my own bed, but I find myself missing the warmth of his body against mine.


	11. The Walls Grow Hands And Teeth

_(Nine months ago) ___

__My powers are impressive, I have to admit. The flames are beautiful, the orange and red glow washing over the normally plain white walls of the room. I’ve never used them much before. It was always something I needed to hide—something that I couldn’t take pride in, couldn’t show. There were always whispers from my parents and other people. Don’t show what you are. Hide it, or something terrible will happen. It’s dangerous. Not something to like, not something to love. Dangerous._ _

__The strangeness of the Facility is that my powers are suddenly appreciated. I’m praised—admired for what I can do. I’m encouraged to work more—encouraged to use my powers more and more. Now that I can see the full extent, the full beauty of what it is exactly I can do, I’m awed that I hid it for so long._ _

__But I wish I could have appreciated my powers before I was taken here. Because now I’m forced to use my abilities until I physically cannot anymore. It takes the joy, the happiness out of it, making it something I dread. Every day leaves me worn out and drained. I’ve never used my powers this much before, save a few occasions when I was curious. I’m exhausted, swaying on my feet as the flames splutter out around me. I struggle to keep my eyes open as my head throbs._ _

__“Keep going.” The voice is cold and cutting as it echoes through the room.  
I force myself to lift my arms, focusing on the flames. But everything’s a faded blur in my mind. I’m too exhausted to feel the fire at all.   
“I can’t,” I drop my hands by my side. “I’ll pass out if I do.”  
“Continue.” The voice says again.   
“I can’t,” I beg. “I really can’t anymore.”  
The door slams open, crashing into the wall.   
“Did you just disobey me?” Mr. Styles shouts as he storms into the room. The sound rings out as he slaps me across the face. _ _

__My face stings, and I reach up, feeling blood on my face from where my teeth caught my lip. I shrink back, but he’s not done. He grabs the collar of my shirt, pulling me forward.  
“We saved you off the streets, and this is how you repay us?” He screams, spittle flying from his mouth. “You owe us.” That’s not true. I don’t owe them anything—they were the ones who dragged me from my home and my family. But I don’t argue back as he drops me, pushing me away.   
I keep my mouth shut as he rants on. “We give you a roof over your head, encourage you, train you to use your powers, and all you will say is that you can’t?”  
I keep my gaze fixed to the floor, hoping he’ll let me go, but he’s not done. His hand reaches down, grabbing me roughly and forcing me to look up at him.   
“Are you even hearing what I’m saying?” he spits.   
“Y-yes, sir,” I stammer out. “I won’t again.”   
But he’s not placated. He drops me with a disgusted snort as he turns away. “Take him to the Dark Room.”_ _


	12. Make A Wish On Our Sorry Little Hearts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got a potato thrown at me (it was mushy) and was told to update, so here. You can probably guess who shows up by the title.

I can’t fall asleep. It’s not the first time I’ve had this issue, but today has been one of the worst. I shift again, rolling over on my side to try to get more comfortable, but nothing works. I can hear Kellin’s steady breathing from across the room and sigh, leaning back against my pillows again. With my luck, I’ll maybe get an hour or two of sleep before they come and get us for Study again. 

As I stare at the door and the faint light shining through, I swear I see the walls shimmer, but it’s probably the lack of sleep getting to my brain. I sit up quickly, scanning the room, just to make sure, but everything’s the same. I must be imagining things. I run my hand over my face, moving to lie back down, but something catches my eye. 

The towel is on the ground. 

I frown as I stare at it for a few seconds. I could swear it was hanging on the rack just a second

I push my sheets off of me, standing up in the center of the room. Kellin is still fast asleep on his bunk, curled toward the wall, his lips slightly parted. I can’t help but smile at the sight as I cross the room, reaching to pick up the towel.

A cold hand clamps over my mouth, and I let out a muffled yelp of surprise. I struggle to free myself, but my captor is stronger than me. My left hand sparks dangerously, and I’m shoved roughly against the wall, losing my concentration on the flames.

“Shut it,” the voice whispers.  
“What the hell?” I shove at the air in front of me. My hand makes contact with something—someone who lets out a grunt. 

A boy with dark brown hair about my age shimmers into appearance in front of me, an annoyed expression on his face. The number M-52 is printed across his uniform.  
“What was that for?” he asks.  
I stare at him. “What was that for?” I splutter. “How did you even get in—”  
“Invisibility. Duh.” He gestures to himself.   
“No, how did you unlock the door and get out?” I’ve tried to unlock it from the inside, even tried to melt through the door, but it is too strong. I ended up passing out for three days. Not to mention the punishment for using my powers was being locked up in the Dark Room for two nights. I shudder at the memory.   
“Oh, that.” He waves his hand dismissively. “Alex’s gotten pretty good with his powers.”  
“Alex?” I ask. I’m assuming he’s one of the others.  
“My roommate. I’m Jack by the way.”  
“Vic.” I gesture to Kellin’s sleeping form. “That’s Kellin.”  
“Nice to meet you, Vic,” Jack pulls open the door. “Coming?”

I nod, following him into the dimly lit hallway after one last glance around my room. I would wake Kellin up, but after the day he’s had, I know I should let him sleep. Jack grabs my hand, his skin cold against my always warm hands. I feel a strange sensation running through my skin, like something crawling down my arms. It’s not uncomfortable, but not exactly pleasant either. When I look down at myself, I can only see the cement floor beneath me.   
“Whoa,” I whisper.  
“Weird, huh?” Jack’s disembodied voice says from beside me. “Just make sure you’re in contact with me. Or you’ll be visible. And keep quiet. I can’t mask the sound.”

I feel him tugging on my hand as he leads me away from the room, shutting the door quietly behind us and latching it. Apprehension runs through me as I do so. I’ve never left this room without one of the guards telling me to do so. For a moment, I wonder what will happen if I’m locked out. Jack said that Alex could unlock the doors, but what if he wasn’t able to? How badly would they beat me up? How long would they throw me in the Dark Room for? At least Kellin won’t get blamed. I push the thoughts from my mind as Jack pulls me down the hall. 

Kellin and my room is located at the end of the hall. From what I’ve seen, the building is made up of two halls, one on top of the others. The study and practice rooms are located on this floor while most of the rooms are on the top floor, including where the guards are. That’s why I haven’t seen most of the others—they mostly stay on the top floor. 

The ground floor is mostly made up of the kitchen and several closets and warehouses. And the Dark Room. I shiver as I pass by it. It’s an involuntary reaction, but every time I see it, I can’t help but remember what happened. 

Jack tugs me up the stairs, past the dark practice rooms. We both freeze as a guard walks by. I hold my breath, praying he keeps going, but he pauses, staring into the shadows where Jack and I are frozen. He rubs his eyes and panic flashes through me. I remember how I noticed the walls shimmering in my room. If he sees us—then we’re—

The guard shakes his head, continuing down the hall. I wait until his footsteps have faded before letting out a breath.  
“That was close,” Jack mutters as he tugs me down the hall, moving faster than before. 

Finally, he stops at a door, one identical to mine, a three painted on the door, rapping on it lightly three times. “So he knows it’s me,” he mutters to me. He waits three seconds before unlatching it and opening it to reveal the boy I saw earlier.


	13. We’re Nothing But Trouble

I’m ushered quickly into the room before the door is shut. The other boy—he must be Alex, closes his eyes, holding his hands out. I watch in astonishment as I hear the lock click into place. 

Jack crosses the room, sitting on his bed as Alex opens his eyes, shaking his head.  
“Hey, we saw each other earlier,” Alex says in greeting. “I’m Alex.”  
“I’m Vic,” I say. “Why’d you bring me here?”  
“Cause Alex was curious. We’ve never seen you before,” Jack explains.  
“You’ve met others?” I ask.  
“Of course. You haven’t?”  
I shake my head. “No. You guys are the first guys I’ve actually talked to.”  
“How long have you been here?”  
“A year or so. Kellin, my roommate, is new.” I shrug. “What about you?”  
“Six months,” Alex says. “Four for Jack.”  
“You guys set up a whole system that quickly?” I suddenly feel inadequate next to them.  
“Well, there’s not much else to do,” Alex says. “Also, Jack hates being cooped up, so I had to figure out something other he’d annoy me to death.”  
“What can I say? I’m a free spirit,” Jack replies, making Alex roll his eyes. He makes a kissy noise at Alex, who shoves him away.  
“You’re impossible,” Alex mutters before turning to me. “You never tried?”  
I hold up my hand, letting my flames spark. “A few times. Didn’t work very well.” I shudder at the memory. “My roommate had more luck.”  
“Kellin?” Jack asks. “I thought he was new.”  
I shift uncomfortably, the memories painful. “No, not him,” I mumble.  
Alex seems to catch on that it's a touchy topic, so he changes the subject. “I don’t think I’ve met everyone here yet. There are Jack and me. You and Kellin. Room two is empty—it’s never been used. Room one is the same, but someone was in there. They are long gone now though.” When I give him a questioning look, he explains. “We snuck in. There’s dust all over everything, and the beds are unmade.”  
“What about room four?” I ask.  
“Oh, that.” Jack scowls briefly.  
“What?” I ask.  
“Craig’s in that room,” Alex explains. “We don’t know him very well. Jack doesn’t like him cause Craig kicked his ass.”  
“You’ve fought?”  
“They make us.” Alex tips his head. “You’ve never?”  
I shake my head. “No. I’ve never met any of you others. So what powers does he have? Jack has invisibility, and you have telekinesis, I have fire. Kellin’s got healing.”  
“Craig’s got power manipulation,” Alex says.  
“Wow,” I say. “So, do you think there are any more of us?”  
“Maybe,” Alex shrugs. “Who knows? I’d guess so—seeing as there are only five rooms.”  
“Why ten, though?” I ask. “What’s the point of us? Why do we even have powers?”  
“To fuck things up,” Jack supplies.  
Alex kicks him. “I don’t know,” he admits. “It’s probably for some reason, right? I mean, everything happens for a reason.”  
“I hope so,” I say.  
“So we’re just waiting for five people? Or only three since room one looks like it’s been used.”  
“No.” I don’t want to explain why. “Four.”  
Jack looks confused at my statement. He opens his mouth to say something, but Alex elbows him sharply. I wonder how much Alex realizes. He would’ve been here—five months ago was when it happened. 

Silence hangs in the air, awkward and heavy. I can feel the sympathy radiating off of Alex. Jack seems confused, but I’m sure Alex will explain it to him later. I really don’t want to talk about it—or remember it. Strange, considering I’ve had plenty of nightmares reliving the day. I’d think I’d be desensitized to it by now, but no.

“You should get back,” Alex says at last. “We should try to get some sleep.”  
“Like that’s gonna happen,” Jack mutters. “You’re just gonna ramble on about space or some shit all night.”  
Alex rolls his eyes at the comment, but he doesn’t have a chance to respond as Jack grabs my hand, leading me toward the hallway. The strange sensation trickles up my arms, but it’s less uncomfortable this time.  
“See you around?” Alex calls.  
I find myself smiling. “Hope so.” 

I’m still smiling, even as Jack shuts the door to my room, locking it. I don’t feel so alone anymore. It’s not just me and Kellin against the world. There’s more of us.


	14. Feels Like The Walls Are Closing In

_(Nine months ago) ___

I’m pretty sure I’m going to lose my voice. My throat hurts from screaming. I know I must look terrible. I haven’t been able to stop crying for the entire time I’ve been in here, the saltiness from the tears stinging cuts on my face. I can’t reach up and wipe them away as they drip onto my shirt, running pink from my blood. My whole body is trembling, from fear or anger, I don’t know. I can’t breathe—my heart slamming into my ribs as I strain to free myself.

____

I tug at the shackles again, but they don’t budge. Warmth trickles down my wrists as I strain against the restraints, again and again, not caring about the pain. I need to get free. I can’t be trapped here. I can’t— 

____

“Please!” I scream. “Let me out.” But there’s no response. I’ve never felt more alone, my chest tightening. My head spins as I gasp for breath. I hate being trapped. I hate being helpless. I hate feeling weak. The darkness is closing its fists around my throat, and I can barely breathe. 

____

I try to summon the fire again and again, but nothing happens. I can only see a faint spark in the metal before I’m left in the darkness again. I tug at the restraints again and again, but they don’t budge. 

____

“Please!” I scream again. “I’m sorry!”

____

At last, I collapse to the ground, too worn out to struggle anymore. Every bone in my body aches as I put my head down, forcing myself to take in a breathe slowly. I focus on the pinpricks of light coming in from the blocked off window and the door frame. Breathe. The darkness starts to loosen its hold as it slinks away slowly. 

____

I’m not sure how much time passes before the door opens, light flooding into the room. I blink groggily as several people enter the room. Mr. Styles kneels down in front of me, taking my face in his hand as he examines it, a small smile on his face. 

____

“Have you learned your lesson?” He asks.  
I find myself nodding. Yes. Anything to get me out of here.  
“Will you disobey us again?”  
I shake my head. No. I won’t. I’ll be a good subject. I’ll do what I’m told to. Anything, anything to keep me from being thrown back here again.  
“Good.” He smiles at me. “We’ll start again tomorrow.”

____

I let out a hiss of pain as they pull off the shackles. I can barely stand as they haul me to my feet, practically dragging me down the hallway to my room. 

____

Jaime looks up, shocked as I’m thrown in. I know I must look terrible, my eyes red and puffy from crying, my wrists rubbed raw. He waits until the door is closed before wrapping me in his arms. 

____

“I was so scared,” I sob, burying my face in his shoulder. “I hated it. It’s terrible. I was so scared.”  
“It’s okay,” Jaime says, but it’s not. It’s really not. It will never be okay. He takes my hands, shaking his head at the sight as my wrists rubbed raw by the shackles. “Does it hurt?” he asks, probing the skin gently.  
I suck in a breath, yanking my wrists away. “Yes,” I reply simply, letting my hands drop into my lap. 

____

He crosses the room to his bunk, kneeling beside it. I watch him curiously as he fishes around underneath it, pulling out a small red box. I recognize it to be a first aid kit from the Study rooms.  
“How did you get that?” I ask as he pulls out bandages from it.  
“Stole it when they weren’t looking,” he replies. “Thought it might come useful at some point.”  
“Won’t they be suspicious when they see my hands are bandaged?”  
“They won’t care,” Jaime says. He wraps the bandages around my wrists. I try not to wince at the pain.  
“Thanks,” I say when he’s done. He simply nods, crossing the room and sitting on his own bed.

____

“I miss being a normal kid,” I sigh, leaning back against the wall. “I miss my old life.”  
“We both do,” he says. “I’d give anything to be free again.”

____


	15. There’s No Place To Go

Thank god we don’t have the early shift for Study today. Otherwise, I would have fallen asleep in the middle of using my powers. I can’t help but smile, though. It was worth it, sneaking out and staying out late. Meeting Alex and Jack. Two others, just like Kellin and me. I am not alone anymore. 

I wake up at the buzzer signaling food is arriving. A hand touches my shoulder. I roll over, not wanting to open my eyes. If it’s around noon now, I’ve only gotten a few hours of sleep.  
“Vic,” a voice says. “Wow, you were tired.”  
“Go away,” I mumble, burying my face in the blankets. “I’m sleeping.”  
I hear Kellin’s light laugh as he shakes me again. “C’mon, wake up,” he says.  
I groan, finally opening my eyes, blinking in the light. 

Kellin is standing over me with an amused expression on his face. “Morning,” he says when he sees I’m finally awake. “Or should I say afternoon?”  
“Shut up,” I mutter as I sit up, running my hand through my hair. I notice he’s still moving stiffly as I sit down on the floor next to him. “You seem happy. How are you feeling?”  
“I’ve been better,” he admits. “But, I’m okay.”

“Can I see?” I ask, motioning to his shirt.  
He hesitates, then nods, pulling it off. My cheeks heat up, and I look away, not wanting him to see that I’m blushing. I look at him, seeing his cheeks are red too, his gaze avoiding mine. I come closer to him, waiting for him to nod before I touch him. I carefully pull off the bandages, trying not to hurt him. The bruises look more faded than yesterday, the cuts much shallower. Is it possible he’s healed faster? He shifts uncomfortably as I run my fingers along the mostly healed skin. I drop my hand quickly, moving back from him.  
“Do they still hurt?” I ask.  
He shrugs as he pulls on his shirt, wincing as does so. “Not as much as yesterday. I think my powers are working.”  
“That’s good,” I say. “At this rate, you’ll be healed by tomorrow.”  
“They’re just gonna do it again,” Kellin says. “So, there’s no point is there?”

I don’t know what to do or say. Comfort him and lie to him? Or tell him the truth. Neither is a good option.  
He sees my expression and seems to read my mind. “It’s okay,” he says hastily. “I know.”  
“It’s not though,” I say, frustrated. “They’re hurting you.”  
“It’s just for my powers,” he says. “I’ll be okay once they kick in.”  
I shake my head. “They’re still hurting you,” I say. “That’s not okay.”  
He just shrugs, looking away from me. My stomach twists as I remember what he said last time. _I’ve had worse _. Anger flares in my mind. None of this is okay. They shouldn’t be allowed to hurt Kellin. No one should.__


	16. I Never Meant To Hurt Nobody

_(Five months ago) ___

The next few months go by, every day about the same—me using my powers until I physically can’t stand up anymore. I don’t fight back again, just follow whatever instructions they tell me without complaint. It seems to have placated Mr. Styles. He’s stopped watching me so carefully during my sessions, opting to let the other scientists do so instead. 

____

So when the buzzer beeps and Mr. Styles enters the room, I’m not expecting it. Jaime and I both look up from our beds, staring in confusion. He almost never comes into our room. Usually, he sends one of the scientists instead. 

____

“M-37,” he says. “Come with me.” I get to my feet, apprehensively following him out obediently. I flash one last confused look at Jaime, who shrugs.  
“Good luck,” he mouths at me. I give him a grim smile in response as I’m led out of the room. 

____

I wonder if I’ve done something wrong. I don’t think I have, but who knows? I’ve been following instructions, keeping my head down. So what is all this about? 

____

We don’t head in the direction of the Dark Room. The knowledge relaxes me as I follow them up the stairs and to the Study room. 

____

He stops and signals for two of the guards to come forward. I instinctively tense, but they don’t hurt me. They only strap the familiar contraptions to my wrists. When the guards step back, I shift the contraptions, so they’re not digging into my skin as much. 

____

“You’ve been doing very well lately,” Mr. Styles says, breaking the silence. “After your little setback,” he makes a disgusted expression as he says the words. “We are glad to see you are back to normal.”  
I’m not sure how to respond, so I just nod.  
“Today, we have a special task for you. Since you’ve shown so much potential, we have a test.” He crosses the hallway, opening the door for me. “Go ahead. We hope you will show even more progress after today.”

____

I step through the doorway, apprehensively into the dimly lit room. The lights flick on in the Study room, brightness making me wince. I scan the room, the familiar-looking white walls, before freezing when my eyes travel to the shape in the center of the room. My heart almost stops when I fully take in what’s waiting for me.

____

I turn to stare in horror at Mr. Styles, who looks calmly back at me, motioning for me to move forward. I do so, my legs shaking, thoughts whirling through my mind. I can’t do this, can I? I promised to be obedient, but can I really do this? It could have been any other day, any ordinary day where they made me burn random objects, a tire, a desk, or a stack of papers. They could have let me have an easy day—a typical day. But not this time. 

____

Because there’s a person tied to a stake in the middle of the room.

____


	17. When All You Got Is These Four Walls It’s Not Hard To Feel So Small

Kellin has nightmares again. I wake up to hear him crying in the middle of the night. The sound is painful to hear, a lump forming in my throat. I cross the room, reaching over to shake him awake. Thankfully, this time he wakes up quickly, blinking at me groggily.   
“Hey,” I whisper. “You okay?”  
He nods, sitting up quickly, so he’s facing me. His eyes are glistening slightly as he blinks rapidly.  
“Nightmares again,” he whispers.   
“Do you want to talk about it?” I ask, knowing he won’t.   
As expected, he shakes his head. “Not know,” he mumbles. I don’t want to press him, so I nod, getting up to leave.   
“Can you stay here?” he asks. He blushes as he says it, hurrying on. “it’s just easier when there’s someone else with me, and I’m not alone,” he mumbles the last part, as if he is embarrassed.   
I nod. “Yeah. Of course. Anything you need.”   
The bed creaks as I lie down next to him, hearing him shift over on the small bed to give me more room. It’s still cramped though; he’s practically lying on top of me. The thought makes my face heats up. I’m glad he can’t see me from where he’s lying.   
“Thank you,” he whispers.   
“No problem,” I reply. “I don’t mind.”  
“No one’s ever been so nice to me before,” he mumbles. My stomach twists at his words, disgust filing me. Why haven’t they? I’m just being a good roommate and friend. A part of me wonders if he meant to say that or not—since he is half asleep. But before I can ask him, he’s asleep. 

Lying there, next to him, I’m suddenly aware of everything. The way his body is pressed against mine. The way his shirt rides up slightly, revealing just a sliver of pale skin. I want to wrap him in my arms and hold him, but I’m not sure how he’ll react, so I don’t. I opt to listen to his breathing until I drift off into sleep as well. 

But I wake up in the morning, finding my arms around him anyway. 

\---

When afternoon comes around, all I can do is worry about Kellin as I’m standing in the room. They gave me a day off today—not sure if I should be concerned or not about that. 

The door flies open, and I jump to my feet, expecting to see an injured Kellin stumbling in, but Mr. Styles walks in instead. 

I tense as his gaze travels around the room. There’s no way he could have found out about my trip to Jack and Alex’s, right? Is he coming to tell me something happened? Is Kellin alright? 

“Glad to see you’re doing well, M-37,” he says. “Your results have improved.” Have they? I haven’t noticed a difference at all.   
“We’re glad you can put in the effort,” he says, grinning at me. As if they don’t threaten to beat me or lock me in the Dark Room if I don’t comply. As if I have a choice. “We weren’t certain after M-26 if you would—”   
“Don’t.” The word comes out less of a shout and more of a choked whisper.   
I swear Mr. Styles smiles at my reaction. “Well, M-49 hasn’t been doing well,” he says. I tense at the mention of Kellin’s number. I swear, if they did something to him again, I’ll—  
“We are hoping that since you have experience with this, you can guide him into being more cooperative and willing to work.” I have to grit my teeth to stop myself from exploding. Guide him? It’s not his fault he can’t access his powers. How in the world am I supposed to do this?  
“I don’t know what you want me to do,” I say quietly, keeping my gaze trained on the floor.   
“Do I have to remind you what happens if you don’t?” I don’t know whether it’s meant to threaten my safety or Kellin’s, but either way, I know I can’t let it happen.   
I shake my head, and he smiles. “Good,” he says. “I hope to see some progress.” With that, he leaves, slamming the door behind him and letting me sit with an impossible problem to solve.


	18. Red Rose Of The Dead

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love cliffhangers lmao. I'm sorry, I'm just so dramatic when I write. Promise I won't leave y'all hanging for too long. 
> 
> Also, has anyone watched Euphoria? I'm two episodes in and it's good. I don't usually listen to that type of music, but the soundtrack is really good too.

_(Five months ago) ___

____

The door slamming behind me makes me jump as the contraptions on my wrists light up, sensors ready. I can only stand and stare at the man tied to the wooden stake in the center of the room. He’s awake, his gaze meeting mine even as I try to look away. His throat works furiously, and I assume he’s trying to say something through the cloth tied over his mouth. 

____

“M-37,” the voice rings from the speaker. “Go.”

____

I jump with a start, glancing around the room at the hidden speakers in the walls. Do they actually want me to do this? Are they actually going to make me kill someone? 

____

“M-37,” the voice says again, more impatient this time. “Go.”

____

The door behind me opens again, and I spin around to see Mr. Styles enter the room, accompanied by two guards. He frowns at me when I don’t move.

____

“Well, what are you waiting for?” he prompts as I stand there, staring. “Go.” But I can’t. I can’t just kill an innocent person, can I? I can’t be the one who takes a life. He has a family, people who care about him. How would they grieve to lose someone they love? I can’t be the one to take his life away. 

____

“I won’t.” It comes out as a whisper rather than a shout.  
“What did you say?”  
I clear my throat. “I won’t do it.” I pull off the plastic contraptions, throwing them to the ground. 

____

I’ve never seen him look so angry as he storms into the room. I have to resist the urge to shrink backward and instead cross my arms over my chest, staring back at him. 

____

The slap makes my eyes water as I clutch my cheek. I don’t falter though, getting back to my feet and staring at him.  
“I’m not going to kill a person for you,” I say, my voice growing stronger.  
“You do it, or you’ll regret it,” he warns, his face red with anger.  
I shake my head, and that’s all he needs. Before I can even blink, a gunshot echoes through the room, and the man slumps over, misted pink blood and clumps of hair spraying across the white walls. I let out a choked scream, but it’s cut off as I’m shoved roughly to the ground. 

____

“Don’t you dare disobey me,” he snarls down at me. I struggle to get away, but he grabs the collar of my shirt, pulling me up. His fist connects with my cheek as I fight to get away from him. I feel several rapid punches to my stomach and cough, the air forcing its way out of my lungs. I wince as I feel the last blow to my stomach, this one sharper than the last ones were. He lets go of me as I double over, dropping to my knees on the ground. 

____

My fingers light up in fire as I push myself up, lifting my chin. I won’t be weak. I won’t give in. I’m not going to let him see that I’m scared. Holding my head up high, I stand, facing him. I’m ready to take whatever he throws at me. 

____

My head spins suddenly, a strange sensation coming over my limbs. Hot and cold flashes over me in an instant, my whole body shaking. I see Mr. Styles staring at me, a strange expression on his face. Is that curiosity? Maybe horror? I’m not sure. 

____

Dark scarlet splatters over the ground around me, and I stare at it in confusion. Blood? That can’t be right. The world tips around me suddenly, and I stumble, pain flaring in my stomach. A strange warmth trickles down my front. I try to take a breath, then almost scream from the pain. I glance down at my shirt, shocked to see I’m covered in blood. I have time to think, _wow, I’m really bleeding a lot _before the ground rushes toward me and I black out.__

____


	19. Are You Living Well In A Living Hell

“Have you guys ever had issues with your powers?” I ask. It’s probably close to dawn, but the three of us are still talking. I’m sitting on the floor in front of Alex’s bed where Jack and Alex are sitting. “Like not being able to reach them?”  
“No,” Jack says. “It’s always been really easy for me.”  
“Me too,” I say. “Kellin’s been having trouble, though.”  
“Is he scared of using them?” Alex wonders out loud. “That might be it.”  
“Maybe,” I shrug. “I don’t see why though.”  
“He might not have found the right motivation,” Alex says.   
“They’re hurting him. I’d think that’s enough motivation,” I point out.  
“Not if he’s scared,” Alex counters.   
I sigh. “I’ll talk to him. I hate that he’s being forced to use them, though.”  
Alex nods. “It just doesn’t seem right, but what else do we do?”  
Jack sends him a curious glance but doesn’t say anything. Alex quickly shakes his head, turning back to me. I frown, watching the exchange between them. It’s almost as if they’re hiding something from me, but I don’t press them, changing the topic instead. 

“Have you ever been caught?” I ask Jack. “All the times you’ve snuck around, have they ever found out?”  
“Not yet,” Jack grins. “I’m just that incredible.”  
“That’s a lie,” Alex elbows Jack. “We almost got caught once or twice.”  
“Almost is the key word,” Jack says.  
“What were you even doing?”  
“Sneaking around,” Jack says. “We wanted to steal some food from the kitchen.”  
“By that, you mean you wanted to,” Alex says. “You just grabbed me and said you wanted to try something.”  
“You wanted to come,” Jack protests.   
“Did not,” Alex argues back.  
“Did too.”  
“Could you turn a whole building invisible?” I ask Jack, trying to continue the conversation before they start another argument. “Or like a table or something?”  
“No,” Jack says. “It’d take too much effort. Besides, it doesn’t work on non-living things. But it did work on Alex, so—”  
“Did you just call me dead?” Alex asks.   
“Dead inside more like,” Jack says.  
“Wow, and here I thought you loved me,” Alex fake groans.   
Jack pecks Alex on the lips. “Course I love you,” he says.   
Alex rolls his eyes, but he doesn’t push him off, taking Jack’s hand. “I love you too, Jacky,” he says in a joking way, but I can tell he’s being serious.   
“So,” I clear my throat. “I’ll just go then. Leave you two to either bicker or make out cause that’s all you do apparently.”  
Jack laughs at my discomfort. “You can join in if you want.”  
I wrinkle my nose at him. “Thanks, but I’ll pass.”  
“Just get with Kellin already,” Jack replies. “Then you’ll know what love is.” I can’t help but flush at his words. It’s not like they know, right? Alex notices my blush and elbows Jack slightly.   
“We’re just kidding,” Alex says.   
“No, but seriously please get with Kellin,” Jack says.   
I shift uncomfortably. “So how long have you and Alex been together?”  
“Trying to change the subject?” Jack teases, and I roll my eyes, blushing.   
“Two months,” Alex says.   
“He fell for me when we first met,” Jack says at the same time. Alex raises his eyebrows at Jack, but Jack just grins and plows on. “I’m just so amazing that he proposed right there, and then when I walked in.”  
“I hate you,” Alex groans.  
“No, you love me,” Jack says, leaning over to kiss Alex again.   
“I hate both of you,” I cut in. “Can I go before I’m scarred for life?”

“You like Kellin, though, don’t you?” Alex asks.   
“What?” I splutter, caught off guard. “No, I don’t.”  
“Don’t lie,” Jack says. “I’ve seen you look at him.”  
“You guys are creepy,” I groan. “How often are you watching us?”  
“All the time,” Jack grins. “Every single minute.”  
“That’s weird,” I mutter. “I’m gonna be paranoid now, aren’t I?”  
Jack yawns, and I realize how tired I am.   
“Shit,” Alex mutters. “It’s almost morning.”  
“I need to go before we’re caught,” I jump to my feet, dragging Jack with me into the hallway. 

“But seriously, ask him out,” Jack whispers as we get to my door.   
“What? No!” I try to shut the door, but Jack holds it open.   
“I mean, what else are you gonna talk about?” He asks as I finally manage to shut the door. I just stand in the center of my room for a few minutes with a stupid grin plastered to my face. It’s nice to have friends again.


	20. The Smoke And The Drowning Flames

_(Five months ago) ___

It’s just pain. That’s the only thing that registers as I first come back into consciousness. I don’t so much wake up, more so drift through the murky gray. 

____

Then I remember. The man tied to a stake in the middle of the room—the person I was meant to kill. My stab wound. The dark blood all over my shirt. 

____

For a minute, I wonder if I’m dying. It certainly feels like it. I can’t open my eyes, can’t move at all. It hurts to breathe, hurts to think. The thought terrifies me. I can’t die yet. Not now. I’m only sixteen. I have so much more to live for. There’s so much more in life I haven’t experienced yet. I won’t die now. I won’t let myself. I struggle to sit up, then almost scream as the pain flares, worse than it was before. 

____

A weight comes down across my body, holding me down, even as I struggle against it. I fight against my captors—my thoughts whirling through my mind. I have to get free. I can’t let them hold me here. I don’t know what they are doing to me. I can’t— 

____

“Hold still,” I hear a voice curse as something presses down against my wound. Darkness creeps to the edges of my vision, threatening to spill over.  
“He’s losing too much—”  
“Keep it—”  
“Someone get the—”  
“Quickly—”  
“We’re losing—” 

____

The words fly by, too quickly for my mind to register through the pain. I fight back against the darkness, struggling to stay awake. Just stay awake for a bit longer, I tell myself. A few more moments, then I can give in to the sweet darkness. Just a few more— 

____

I feel sharp pinpricks of pain in my stomach and try to move away, but something tightens around my wrists, holding me down. Through the haze in my mind, I register a needle and the sound of a machine beeping. 

____

I don’t recall summoning flames, but the smell of smoke cuts through my senses. Even in my half-conscious state, I register the sound of fire crackling and the wail of a nearby smoke alarm. I hear a yell of panic and frantic voices in the background. But my senses are screaming with too much pain to think straight. 

____

Something digs into my left arm, and ice-cold liquid seeps through my veins. I try to move away, but I can’t as my senses fade even more, and the world goes dark around me again. 

____

\---

____

I wake up as I’m being half dragged, half carried down the hallway. I try not to scream as pain jolts through me, searing hot. It hurts so much I can’t breathe, my mind spinning. I will myself to pass out, will the darkness to come back. Please make this end, I beg silently. The pain is almost too much for me to bear. 

____

I don’t even register the fact that we’ve reached my room until the door is yanked open and I’m thrown in. I nearly faint from the pain, collapsing to the ground, agony shooting through my whole body. I’m hot and cold all over, my breaths coming in gasps. 

____

Jaime jumps to his feet as he sees me come in, relief flickering on his features. It quickly turns to shock, then horror as he takes in my bloodied and disheveled appearance.

____


	21. I Will Glow For You

I’m not sure what to do. I turn the problem over and over again in my mind as I sit on my bed, staring at the wall. How do I help Kellin through this? Is there any way I can? I’m not a mind reader—I don’t know what he’s thinking. I don’t want to press him either—he’s had a rough past, that’s all I can tell. Still, I know if I don’t do anything, it will only be worse for both of us. 

“What is that?” Kellin asks.   
“What?” I startle back to reality.   
“What you’re doing,” he says. I realize I’m tapping my two fingers against my lips subconsciously.   
“Oh,” I stop. “It’s something my family used to do. When we couldn’t talk to each other, we’d tap our first two fingers against our lips to tell each other we loved each other. It comforts me, I guess.”   
“That’s cool,” he says. He mimes my action. “Like this?” 

I can feel myself blushing. He’s just miming what I’m doing, I scold myself. He’s not actually—I shake my head. “Yeah,” I do it back to him. “It was just a way for us to show we cared about each other.”  
“Well,” he does the motion again. “I care about you.”  
I’m probably grinning like an idiot, but I do the same. “I care about you too.”

“Do you miss home?” he asks suddenly.   
“I miss my parents,” I say. “And my little brother Mike. I never got to say goodbye to them. I went to find them once, and they were just gone.” Still, to this day, I wonder what happened to them. I like to imagine that they ran away—that they’re living on some tropical island or in some mansion somewhere. It’s easier than facing the reality that they might be dead.   
“What happened to them?” Kellin asks.  
I shrug. “I’m not sure. It was like they never existed. What about you?”   
“I miss my mom,” he says. “Not my dad, though.” His eyes quickly dart to me, as if to see how I’ll react.  
“Your nightmares?” I ask softly.   
He shrugs, looking down at the ground as if it is the most exciting thing. “I don’t like being alone,” he mutters. “It just reminds me of him.”  
Maybe I’m just lonely. Or maybe my feelings for him are screwing with my logic. All I know is that I really want him next to me. So I throw caution to the wind. “Come here,” I beckon him over to my bed. He hesitates, then climbs on the bed next to me as I lie down. It’s probably too small for the two of us to share, but I’m okay with it. I shift, moving over, so Kellin has more room.   
“You can come closer, you know,” I feel like teasing him, just a bit. “I promise I don’t bite.”  
Something glimmers in his eye as he shifts closer, but not close enough to. I don’t know what comes over me, but I grab his arm, pulling him closer to me. He tenses for a second as I wrap my arms around him, feeling his heartbeat against my chest.  
“Shh,” I whisper to him, running my hand up and down his back. That does the trick. He relaxes, his head dropping onto the pillow beside me, letting his hand rest against my chest. “You’re not alone. You have me.”  
“Thanks,” he whispers. I watch him, every nerve in my body aware that he’s pressed up against me. It’s hard to relax as my heart thrums in my chest, the close contact making me blush. I’m surprised he doesn’t notice.

I don’t want to break the comfort between us, but I need to do this. I don’t want to think about what Mr. Styles might do to him if I don’t.  
“Why do you think you can’t use your powers?” I ask gently.  
Kellin tenses beside me. “I don’t know,” he says. “I wish I could.”  
“Are you scared of using them?”   
He opens his mouth to say something, then shuts it, looking thoughtful. “Maybe,” he admits. “I’m not quite certain, though.”  
“You don’t have to be scared of them,” I reassure him. “They’re part of you. That means they’re beautiful.”  
He drops his gaze, avoiding my eyes. “I don’t know how to control them,” he whispers. “They just come and go.”  
“It’s like that at first sometimes,” I say. “I find it helpful to focus on my emotions or something I care about. It gets me through a lot.”  
“I don’t really see a point.” Kellin sounds frustrated. “They’ll just hurt me again and again. It doesn’t matter how good I get. Or they’ll hurt other people for me to heal. That’s how my powers work.”  
“It’s gonna be okay,” I say, but even I can hear my voice falter as I lie. It really isn’t going to be okay. He’s going to be hurt no matter what, and there’s nothing I can do but worry.


	22. Burst Into Flames, Scream In The Dark

_(Five months ago) ___

“What did they do to you?” Jaime gasps as soon as the door shuts behind me  
“It doesn’t matter,” I groan, struggling to stand up. Pain washes over me, and I find myself back on the ground where I started. My fingers are slippery with blood as I clutch at my stomach, even though there are stitches there now. It hurts so much to breathe—like there’s a burning knife stabbing into my skin every time I try. 

____

I scream out in pain as Jaime slips his arm under mine, hoisting me up.  
“Sorry,” he mutters as he maneuvers me over to my bed. I grit my teeth, my breaths shallow as he eases me on it. I don’t know if he says anything else—I’m gone by then, lost in the sweet nothingness of unconsciousness. 

____

\---

____

I wake up in darkness. As my vision slowly clears, I can make out the familiar ceiling above me. I’m back in my room. I try to sit up, but I’m unable to, my head swimming with pain. I close my eyes, forcing myself to take shallow breaths. Breathe, I tell myself. Just breathe. It feels like I can’t catch my breath, my skin burning up. Eventually, the pain subsides enough for me to re-open my eyes. 

____

“Jaime?” I croak out.  
“Hey,” I see a blurry shape come closer until I see his face coming into focus. “How are you feeling?”  
I try to take a breath, then regret it instantly as I feel a thousand burning needles stabbing into my abdomen. “Like absolute shit.”  
He lets out a small laugh. “God, you scared me. I thought you were going to die.”  
“Me too,” I say.  
“Actually, I thought you were dead,” he says. “You were gone for three days.”  
“Three days?” I stare at him incredulously. It’s been three days?”  
Jaime shrugs. “I’m guessing they were stitching you up or something. They came in a while ago and pumped you with some painkillers, so the pain is probably somewhat manageable right now.”  
“Can’t wait to see how I feel when it wears off,” I joke. It hurts enough right now, and I’m on painkillers. I will probably pass out when they wear off. I grimace at the thought.  
“What did you even do?” he asks. “I’ve been here for much longer than you, and I’ve never been injured that badly.”  
“Guess I win then.” I let out a laugh, then stop when it hurts too much. I wince as I try to prop myself up on my elbows. Pain sears through my front, making my eyes water, so I let myself lie back down, gasping for breath. “I refused to kill someone.”  
“What?” Jaime looks horrified. “They were going to make you do that?”  
I nod. “I think they wanted to test me or something.”  
He shakes his head. “That’s messed up.”  
“Honestly, I’m not too surprised,” I say. “I mean, they are keeping us trapped here, aren’t they?” 

____

I expect him to respond, but he doesn’t, just staring at me. He opens his mouth, then closes it, chewing on his lip as he watches me.  
“Jaime?” I ask. “What’s wrong?”  
He looks away from me, hesitating before he looks back. “I’m leaving,” he says.  
“Leaving?” Maybe it’s the pain from my wound that’s not letting me think straight. “What do you mean?”  
“I’m escaping from here. I have a whole plan figured out. I was going to wait, but tonight will work.”  
I nod, still processing the information. “Why are you telling me this?”  
“Come with me,” he says. “We’ll escape together. You’re injured—you need better medical care than what little they gave you and what I tried to do.”  
“I’ll just slow you down,” I shake my head.  
“I think the wound is infected,” Jaime says softly. “Vic, it looks really bad. I don’t think—I don’t think you’ll survive here much longer without proper medical treatment. You need to get to an actual hospital, not the makeshift one they have here.”  
“I can’t,” I say. “I won’t be able to make it two steps. You said it yourself—the wound is really bad. Just go.”  
“Vic, please,” Jaime begs. “I will never be able to forgive myself if I leave you here to die. I can’t be responsible for your death.”  
I shake my head, but he cuts me off. “I’ll carry you if you agree or not,” he warns. “I’m kinda past asking for your permission at this point. This is just a courtesy. I’m getting you out of here, whether you want me to or not.”

____

I hold his gaze for a few moments longer, pondering my options. On the one hand, if I stay, I will most likely die from infection or something else worse. But if I go, he has less of a chance of freedom. I almost tell him to go, but the pain in his eyes is what finally makes me give in.  
“Okay,” I breathe out slowly, my heart pounding in anticipation. “Let’s do this.”

____


	23. Keep Tearing My World Apart

Nothing is working. Between worrying about Kellin and meeting with Jack and Alex, I’m hardly getting any sleep. It’s showing too. There are dark circles under my eyes, and I can barely stay awake during Study. Using my power drains me more than usual, and afterward, all I want to do is curl up and sleep—but I can’t. 

“What do you think they’re doing with the information from the Study?” Alex asks. I’m being an idiot again—trading sleep for meeting with Jack and Alex.  
“Sell it on the black market,” Jack responds.  
“Can you be serious for like literally one second?” Alex whines.  
“Nope,” Jack sticks his tongue out at Alex, who elbows him. Jack and Alex start bickering over something—I’m too tired to stop them this time. The two of them argue like an old married couple. I swallow back a yawn as I shift my position on the floor, leaning my head against the wall. 

“Vic, did you hear what I said?” Alex asks.  
“What?” I raise my head, trying to remember. Something about—I can’t quite think of what was going on.  
Alex sees my expression and laughs. “We need to get you some more sleep,” he says.  
“Probably,” I yawn. Did I drift off to sleep? The last few minutes are murky—maybe I did.

“Okay, up you go.” Jack pulls me to my feet. “I’m taking you to your room.” I can only nod, trying not to keep my eyes open as Jack leads me back to my room.  
“Vic, you’re literally asleep,” Jack mutters as he unlatches the door.   
I mumble a thanks to him as he shuts the door. I don’t even hear the door close—I’m asleep before I even register walking to my bed. 

I wake up still feeling unbelievably shitty, even after sleeping for almost the whole night. I move to sit up, then freeze as I look down beside me. Kellin is curled up next to me, his head resting against my shoulder, his eyes still shut. I can’t help but smile, rolling over toward him. I brush some of the hair that’s fallen in his face away, running my fingers down his arm. It seems to wake him up, though, since his eyelids flicker, and he opens his eyes, seeing me and smiling.  
“How’d you get in here?” I ask softly, my fingers tracing shapes against his hip.  
“Sorry. I can go,” he moves to leave, but I pull him back down against me.  
“It’s fine. I was just wondering.”  
He lets out a sigh, resting his head against my chest. “I didn’t want to be alone,” he admits. “Nightmares again.”  
“Do you want to talk about it?” I ask.  
Surprisingly, he nods slowly, shifting away from me, so he’s facing me. “I just dream about him a lot,” he admits, and I know he’s talking about his father.  
“That’s why I hate being alone,” he confesses. “All I can think about are the times I heard him screaming and my mom crying while I hid in the closet.” I don’t say anything, just pull him close to me, cradling him in my arms. Kellin buries his face in my shoulder as he continues.  
“Whenever he found me, he’d—” Kellin swallows hard. “He’d just take his anger out on me. The last night—it was the worse. I thought I was going to die.” He takes a deep breath before continuing. “I somehow survived. I was mostly healed the next morning. It was the first time I ever used my powers. That’s how they found out. That’s why he called them that night,” he whispers.  
“I’m so sorry,” I say, rubbing his back. “Holy shit, Kells, I didn’t know.” He doesn’t respond, but I can see him smile slightly at the sound of the nickname.  
“It’s better when I’m with you,” he mumbles. My cheeks heat up, and I can’t help but smile. I hold him closer as if I can protect him from his past and anything that might hurt him in the future. 

The door swings open, slamming against the wall. Kellin and I jump in surprise, looking up to see Mr. Styles standing in the doorway, surrounded by a pair of guards.


	24. I’m Gonna Light Up This Place And Die In Beautiful Stars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry :( these few chapters are gonna be a wild ride.

_(Five months ago)_

I don’t know how Jaime got the door open, but he somehow did. I’ve tried before but given up, seeing how thick the plating was and that there was no way to unlatch it from the inside. Jaime managed to though—he said he had jammed the lock earlier that day. 

I’m honestly impressed. Jaime really did have everything planned out. Whatever supplies we might need, he has slung over his shoulder in a backpack I didn’t know he had. Right before we left, he jams the security cameras with his powers—that had been easy enough for him, just a quick snap of his fingers. 

The only sound in the hallway is our footsteps as we move as quickly as we can. I try to ignore the pain in my stomach as we hurry, Jaime practically carrying me. 

“It’s just a little further,” he says as we turn the corner. The jammed security cameras hopefully will give us more time, but I know we’re in no shape to fight if they catch us. They’re probably checking on the rooms right now. 

The lights flash overhead, the power coming back on abruptly. Both of us freeze in surprise, exchanging a glance. We’re both thinking the same thing. We’re out of time.  
“Shit,” Jaime mutters. “We gotta get out of here.”  
We move as fast as we can, down the hallway, heading for the pair of double doors at the end. The places usually occupied by the two guards are empty—if everything went according to plan, they are checking the control room. We caught them by surprise. They didn’t suspect Jaime could do this—a foolish mistake on their part, one that we exploited. 

We’re almost there. It’s just a few more meters. But I hear shouts at the end of the hallway. I don’t have to turn to know the guards are charging toward us, running much faster than we currently are. 

“Shit,” Jaime says. “What do we do?”  
“Leave me here,” I gasp. “I’m slowing you down.”  
“I’m not leaving you behind,” Jaime says. “We’re in this together.”  
“It’s better if one of us makes it out,” I plead. “Just go. I’ll be fine.”  
“They’ll kill you, Vic,” Jaime says. “You know that.”  
“So you’re just gonna get caught too? So we can both die?” 

Jaime hesitates, and I know he’s caught in a standstill. They’re drawing closer by the second, and our precious time is slipping away.  
“They won’t kill you if they thought you weren’t part of it,” he mutters."You'd be safe."  
“What about you?” I ask.  
He shakes his head. “I told you, I’m leaving this place, one way or another,” he says. I catch the hidden meaning in his words, my blood running cold. “I’ve been locked up here too long.”  
“Hime—” 

“I’m sorry,” Jaime says. I don’t have time to ask him why before he grabs me roughly, making me cry out in pain. In one move, he shoved me to the ground on my knees just as the guards run around the corner, guns up. There’s a gun in Jaime’s hand, one that I didn’t even know he had. But it’s not pointed at them. It’s aimed at me. 

“Take one step closer, and I’ll kill him,” Jaime warns. The barrel presses against the side of my head and I close my eyes reflexively before I open them again, seeing the guards frozen in front of me. I stare at them in confusion. I thought they’d want me dead. Why are they stopping? 

“Drop the gun,” the guard calls. “And we’ll go easy on you.”  
Jaime shakes his head. “I’m leaving,” he says. “Either you let me walk out that door or I’ll blow his brains out.”  
“Jaime—” I start. They’re never gonna let him go. As soon as he lets go of me, they’ll shoot at him.  
“Shut up,” Jaime yells. His knee digs into my back, and I fall forward, trying not to cry out. I feel the stitches rip in my abdomen and warm blood runs down my front, soaking through my shirt. I gasp in pain, feeling tears prickle in the corners of my eyes. Out of the corner of my eye, I see one of the guards start forward, only to stop as Jaime presses the gun tighter to my head. 

“Fine,” the guard says, holding up his hands. “Just let him go.” Jaime hesitates, then without warning, he shoves me roughly to the side. This time I do scream out in pain, the sound echoing through the hallway. I fall onto the ground, my hands slippery with blood as I gasp for breath through the pain digging into my skull. Hands wrap around my arms in an uncomfortable grip, keeping me from lunging after him as he takes off down the hallway, gunshots echoing after him. 

“Jaime!” I scream, struggling to get away from the guards, even as my head spins, the floor turning red beneath me. I feel the rest of my stitches rip as I lunge forward, the concrete slippery beneath me. 

I see him stumble and fall, panic rushing through me. I shove the guards off, stumbling to my feet as I try to move toward him. I’m too unsteady to stand, though, and I’m on the floor before I know it, gasping for breath as my lungs suddenly seem to collapse. The floor is slick with blood—my blood as pain sears through my body. Still, I struggle to stand, again and again, but each time I know I’m losing, the world spinning faster and faster around me. 

Someone roughly grabs my shoulder, and I cry out in pain. I feel the prick of a needle in my neck, and the world goes dark around me as I struggle to reach my friend.


	25. We’ll Let The Fire Rage

For a moment, there’s just stunned silence as we take in each other. Kellin and I scramble away from each other, but we’re not fast enough. Mr. Styles raises an eyebrow, seeing the two of us in my bed, our bodies tangled together. I’m blushing furiously, and so is Kellin, but more so, I’m scared. How will he react to this? Will he get angry? It wasn’t in the rules that we couldn’t be close—no one ever said we could not. But still, fear pounds through me. All I know is that if they hurt Kellin, I won’t let them get away with it. 

Mr. Styles breaks the silence first. “Would you care to explain what’s going on?” he asks. He’s angry—I can tell from the tense lines in his shoulders.  
Kellin shakes his head quickly. I can only stare at them numbly. What do I say?”  
Mr. Styles raises an eyebrow, and I know I have to react quickly before he lashes out at Kellin. “Sir, we didn’t mean to do anything wrong,” I hold up my hands, pleading with him. “Please don’t get mad at us.” His expression changes at my words, not to one of sympathy, more of one to curiosity. 

“They care about each other,” Mr. Styles remarks, ignoring my plea. It’s a simple statement, but I hear the intent behind it. They’re gonna hurt me probably. Just to see how he will react. Just as long as they don’t hurt him, I’m okay with it. 

“Put M-37 in M-49’s study tomorrow,” he instructs the guard who nods. “I’m curious to see how he might influence his powers.”  
“Anything else, sir?” the guard asks.  
“I should have guessed,” Mr. Styles mutters to himself. “After last time, I just wasn’t certain.”  
“Pardon me, sir?” the guard looks utterly confused.   
Mr. Styles shakes his head. “Never mind that. Let’s leave the two of them be for today.” He turns without another glance at either of us, stepping out into the hallway. 

The door shuts, leaving both of us in stunned silence. Thoughts whir in my mind, but the only thing that stands out is relief. Relief that they’re going to hurt me, not Kellin. He’s going to be okay. 

Kellin’s shaking, from fear or anger, I don’t know. I can tell he’s picked up on the subtext of Mr. Styles’ words.  
“It’s okay,” I reach over, touching his arm.   
“You’re gonna get hurt all because of me,” Kellin snaps, pushing me off. “How is that okay?”  
“That doesn’t matter.”  
“Of course, it does.”   
“You’ll just be able to heal me. It’s fine.” Just as long as they don’t hurt him.   
“What if I’m not able to?” He asks. “What if you—” he swallows hard. “I don’t want to lose you too—” his voice breaks as he turns away from me, a tear rolling down his cheek.   
“I’m sorry,” I say as I pull him toward me. I run my thumb against his cheek, brushing his tears away.   
“Don’t,” he whispers, his eyes closed.   
“It’s okay,” I say, kissing his forehead. “You’re okay.”  
“It’s not,” he whispers. “How will it be okay if you get hurt?”  
“As long as you don’t, I’m okay with it,” I breathe. We’re standing so close together, his breath warm against my cheek, his lips so close to mine. My heart flutters in my chest, each beat growing painfully louder. 

I don’t think. I just lean forward, pressing my lips to his. 

Warmth explodes in my stomach as I close my eyes, savoring the moment. Kellin tenses, startled. Something freezes in me, and I start to pull away, but he is suddenly kissing me back, his hands sliding up to tangle in my hair. I push him against the wall, my fingers grasping at his shirt as I kiss him harder. He wraps his legs around my waist, kissing me back with the same intensity. I feel like I’m either about to float away or fall, sparks exploding in my stomach. 

The buzzer startles me, bringing me to my senses. I pull away sharply. Oh my god, what did I do? “I’m so sorry,” I rasp. “Kellin, gods, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for that to happen.” I’m stumbling backward away from him.   
“Vic—” he calls after me, a confused expression on his face.   
“I’m sorry.” I’m rambling on as the door opens, the guard coming to lead us to the showers. I practically sprint out, not waiting to see his expression. What the fuck did I just do?


	26. At The Edge Of The Blackness

_(Five months ago) ___

I’m not certain how much time passes. All I remember are flashes of bright lights, interrupting the sweet cold darkness. There are voices around me, but I can’t quite make out what they’re saying. I hear the beeping of machines around me. Cold air presses against my skin, something uncomfortable in the crook of my right arm. There’s something on the lower half of my face, rough plastic pressing against my skin. I try to open my eyes, but I can’t—it’s like they’ve been sealed shut. Panic thrums through me as I struggle to sit up, but something holds me down. Jaime. What happened? Something bad—that’s all I know. My memories are fuzzy—it’s like my brain is filled with cotton. I can’t quite remember. There was a hallway. Gunshots. A lot of blood.  
“He’s waking up—” A voice goes in and out.  
“Put him back under.” a different voice says. I try to protest, but cold rushes through my veins, and there’s nothing. 

____

\---

____

I wake up in my room. For a moment, I just lie there, groggily staring at the familiar ceiling over my bunk. How I got here, I’m not quite sure. All I remember is the hallway, and…. Fear flashes through me as I struggle to sit up, gasping as pain twinges in my front. It’s not as bad as I thought it would be, though I’m probably pumped with so many painkillers I’m not quite seeing straight. 

____

Jaime. The name cuts through the fog in my mind. My heart races as I scan the room, stopping in surprise as my eyes land on a figure across from me.

____

There’s another person in my room. Mr. Styles is sitting on the other bed—on Jaime’s bed, watching me. I stare at him in shock for a few moments, forgetting what I was going to stay. He is keeping watch over me as if he cares whether I live or die. I almost laugh at the thought. Am I still asleep? I wouldn’t be surprised if I was. 

____

“Where is he?” I ask, my voice hoarse. “What did you do with him?”  
Mr. Styles ignores my question. “You cared about him, don’t you?” he says softly.  
“Where is he?” I ask again, my voice rising. “Where the fuck is he?”  
Mr. Styles winces. “Calm down,” he says. “Vic, you’re probably still in shock. Not to mention pumped with painkillers. You need to calm down.” My heart is racing so fast, pounding in my ears that I don’t even register the fact that he said my name. Not my number. My name.  
“You killed him, didn’t you,” I say, my voice strangled. My fingers grip the blankets beneath me. “He’s dead, isn’t he?”  
Mr. Styles looks like he wants to say something else, a strange emotion flashing across his face. But he swallows, looking down. “Yes.” 

____

Hearing him admit sucks the air from my lungs. I can’t see anything as the world goes gray around me, fading away. I can’t breathe—my heart is the only thing I can hear—a pounding in my ears. I want to throw up or scream or cry, but I can’t seem to do anything. He’s gone. Jaime’s gone. I feel myself falling, pain slicing through my abdomen. 

____

I’m lying back on my bed before I realize it, Mr. Styles standing above me. He must have caught me when I fell. For some reason, the thought of that makes my skin crawl, disgust flaring in my mind.

____

“Why am I still alive?” I ask. “I tried to escape. You should have killed me too.”  
Mr. Styles frowns. “I don’t think you quite remember,” he says. “You were half-conscious. M-26 held you hostage to try to escape. When he was caught by the guards, he threatened to shoot you.” So Jaime’s plan had worked after all. The knowledge weighs heavily in my stomach.  
“Why would you even care if I lived or died?” I ask. “You were the one who stabbed me.”  
“Contrary to what you think, we’re not monsters,” he says. “We do care about you.”  
“Do you?” I ask bitterly.  
He frowns down at me, and for a moment, I think he’s going to slap me, but he simply sighs. “It’s complicated,” he says. “You are important to us.”  
“As test subjects,” I say.  
“In the beginning, yes. But I care about you, M-37. I care about all of you, now that I’ve gotten to know you.” I don’t respond, just rest my head in my arms, closing my eyes. If he really cared about us, he’d let us go. 

____

The door slams, leaving me alone in my cell. It’s the first time I’ve been alone since I’ve arrived here. That’s what hits me the hardest. Even when I missed my family, missed my old life, when the loneliness crept through the walls, threatening to drag me under, he was there. But now he’s gone, and I’m alone again.

____


	27. Don’t Ruin A Perfect Thing

“You kissed him?” Alex screams.   
“Yeah,” I mutter. “I didn’t mean to. I just got kinda caught up.”  
“Oh my god, Vic!” Alex jumps up and down. “I knew it!”  
“Shut up,” I bury my head in my hands. “I hate you so much.”  
“How’d he react?” Alex asks eagerly  
“I don’t know,” I sigh. “I didn’t wait to see it.”  
“Why not?” Alex looks confused. “Did he push you away or something?”  
“No. He kissed me back.”  
“Then what’s wrong?” Jack cuts in.   
“I feel like I was pressuring him or something. I don’t know, he told me not to, and I did anyway. I’m a terrible person, aren’t I?” I throw my hands up angrily.   
“Vic, you’re not a terrible person,” Alex says. “You’re beating yourself up over nothing. Just talk to him, okay? You don’t know what he thinks.”  
“I think I’m just gonna die from embarrassment,” I mutter. “I wish I didn’t do anything. I’m such an idiot.”  
“You’re not an idiot for being in love,” Alex says. “We all do stupid things for love.”  
“How stupid though?” I mope.   
“I think you’re overreacting,” Jack says. I make a face at him, but he doesn’t let me speak.  
“Alex was especially idiotic when he was trying to win me over.”  
“Was not,” Alex protests.   
“You know he tried to fly?” Jack laughs. “When he didn’t have like any control over his powers.”  
“Oh my god, what happened?” I can’t help but smile at the thought of Alex levitating in the air.  
“He fell and twisted his ankle,” Jack says. “Not to mention he got caught by the guards and got sent to the Dark Room.” I shudder at the mention of the Dark Room, but I’m laughing with Jack.   
“I can do it now,” Alex complains. “It was just one time!” He spreads his arm, lifting a few inches off the ground. “See?”  
“You just look stupid,” Jack says.   
“Not as stupid as you,” Alex shoots back as he settles down comfortably on the ground.  
“Hey!” Jack throws a pillow at Alex, who holds out a hand, stopping the pillow in midair before hurling it back at Jack. 

I lean back, watching them with a smile plastered to my face as they throw pillows back and forth, trying to get me to join in. They somehow always manage to cheer me up, even when I’m feeling terrible. But that’s what friends are for, aren’t they?

\---

It’s strange, waking up in my bed without Kellin next to me. I try not to feel bothered by it, but there’s a strange emptiness in my heart. Gods, I’m falling hard for this boy, aren’t I?

Things are quite awkward between the two of us. I keep my distance from him, avoiding his gaze for the whole day. I can’t look at him, in fear I’ll see a look of disgust or fear on his face. He doesn’t talk to me either, so we stay that way, in heavy silence as we wait for the guards to take us to Study. 

I probably do terribly. I can’t think of anything but Kellin during the Study. What if he actually hates me? I overstepped—I shouldn’t have. Guilt hangs like a stone in my stomach, weighing me down. Mr. Styles shakes his head at me as I leave the room, but I don’t care. I just let the guard lead me back to my room, turning my thoughts over and over again in my mind. What if Kellin never speaks to me again? Oh, that would be terribly awkward. I really think I’d just move in with Jack and Alex, no matter how stupid of an idea that would be. 

Kellin’s already sitting on his bed when I walk in. I avoid looking at him, heading straight to my bed, but he stops me.

“Vic, can we talk?” Kellin asks, his voice soft.   
I let out my breath slowly. “Yeah, sure.” I still can’t face him.   
“About yesterday,” he hesitates.   
“I’m sorry,” I cut in. “I didn’t mean to. I shouldn’t have.”  
“No,” Kellin says. “I—uh, I was okay with it.”  
I finally look at him, surprised. “Really?”  
He nods, looking embarrassed. “I’m just not—ready or anything like that.”  
“Yeah, that’s fine,” I say quickly. “I didn’t mean anything by it—I just kinda got carried away.” I cringe at my own lie, knowing how bad it is. If Jack or Alex were here, they’d slap me. I kind of want to slap myself actually. The words are on the tip of my tongue. _I like you, Kellin. I really really like you. _But I hold them in.  
“Oh, okay,” Kellin says, but he almost looks disappointed, as if he expected me to say something else. He looks like he’s about to say something, but he changes his mind. “So, friends again?”  
“Yeah,” I smile at him. “Friends.” If only he knew how much I wanted us to be more than that.__


	28. I Don’t Wanna Feel A Thing Anymore

_(Three months ago) ___

__I’ve lost all energy. I don’t care how much they hit me, how much they scream. I just can’t bring myself to do anything. I’m so cold all the time—the fires all gone out. The light has shattered inside of me, leaving only the empty darkness._ _

__What would Jaime say if he saw me now? I’m mostly healed—the new stitches they gave me did the trick. It’s been two months, and I can move properly again. The pain is no longer in my stomach every time I breathe. I no longer need painkillers or bandages. If only they could stitch up my heart the same way._ _

__They drag me to the Dark Room, slamming the door shut and leaving me alone. At this point, I don’t even care. I shift against the wall, so the shackles aren’t digging into my wrists and try to sleep, but I know I won’t be able to._ _

__Usually, I would try to escape, try to melt through the shackles, but I don’t anymore. It wasn’t of any use anyways. The metal was too thick for me to make any more than a small indent._ _

__So I just rest my head against my arms, ignoring the crick in my neck and stare at the faint light shining in through the mostly blocked off window. I used to be able to get lost in my head, daydreaming of everything and anything. Now there’s nothing left in my mind except for painful memories and bitter thoughts. I try to close my eyes, try to sleep, but I’m almost scared to. Because every single time I close my eyes, all I can see is the escape. My dreams are haunted by blood and gunshots._ _

__Seeing the hallway doesn’t bother me anymore. I thought it would, but it doesn't. Not after the first time when I couldn’t move after seeing the hallway, when I couldn’t breathe through the weight in my lungs and eventually, I couldn’t stand as the floor rushed up toward me, and everything faded away._ _

__Neither does my now empty room. Even as I am staring at the empty bed or the empty other half of the room. Every so often, I remember glimpses of Jaime sitting on the bed or laughing. But it’s almost like he was never really there. Like a ghost almost. If not for the memories and the dreams, I’d think that I almost dreamed of those six months._ _

__I move through every day like I’m sleepwalking. Everything numb around me, just a gray blur. Not responding when I’m talked to, not reacting to the pain when they hit me because it's nothing compared to the pain within._ _

__And then, eventually, I don’t have any energy left to rebel. It’s like a little voice whispers, _what’s the whole point?_ The more they notice me, the worse it will get. The more they remind me of that day. The more my memories grow teeth, the more my dreams try to strangle me as I see his face over and over again, reaching for me as I’m held back, unable to fight. _ _

__So I try to disappear instead. I shrink back into myself, following orders, keeping my head down, keeping silent. Try to forget, try to move on with my life, even though I’m drowning in the memories. Mr. Styles smiles at me, saying I'm making progress, that I’m learning. But I don’t think so. It’s the most powerful I’ve ever been, but I don’t feel strong. I feel weak. I am weak. For not being able to save him, for not being angry enough to destroy everything. For keeping my head down, for not taking revenge. I’m ashamed that I’m not fighting back. But I’m too tired to do anything about it._ _

__I feel so goddamn empty. There’s really nothing left. There’s no point. I’m never getting out of here. I’ve accepted that._ _


	29. We’re Only Dreaming, What’s Your Problem Baby?

Alex seems nervous when the door shuts behind me. I lean against the wall, sitting in my usual spot between the two beds, looking up at him in confusion. No one has said anything since Jack and I walked in, and the silence is hanging heavily in the air around us. Alex opens his mouth, then closes it, then opens it again, seemingly having a war with himself. He glances at Jack, who gives him a little shrug and a pointed glance. They seem to have a silent argument, in which Jack apparently loses, since he scoots back, leaning against the wall. 

“Okay, what’s wrong?” I finally break the silence. “I can’t read your minds, you know.”  
Alex glances back at Jack for a moment before he takes a deep breath. “Vic, I have to ask you something.”  
“Yeah?” I ask. “Spill.”  
He hesitates, glancing over at Jack for support again. “Please don’t freak out,” he begins. “But we have been thinking for a long time, and we decided. We’re going to escape.”

“No,” I say immediately. “Absolutely not.”  
“See?” Jack mutters to Alex. “I told you that’s what he would say.”  
Alex presses his lips together. “Vic—”  
I shake my head. “No!” Maybe I’m being unreasonable, but all I can think about is the dark blood on the hallway floor. And—  
“I know,” Alex says. “I know what happened with—”  
“Don’t.” My voice is shaking. I know I must look and sound crazy, but I’m doing all I can from getting overwhelmed from the memories. “Just don’t. Please.”  
Alex nods, giving Jack a helpless look. I hear Jack sigh before the bed creaks, and Jack moves to sit down next to me.   
“Vic,” he says. “We’re sorry about what happened, but it won’t be like that. We’re going to be prepared this time.”  
“You don’t know that,” I shout. “Jack, you can’t say that for sure!”  
“But we can try,” Alex says, sitting down on the other side of me. “We have to.”  
I shake my head. “Why did you tell me? What if I told the guards?”  
“You wouldn’t,” Jack says. “I know you wouldn’t.” I have to admit, that’s true. No matter what happened, I would never give up my friends.   
“You think we’d leave you here?” Alex asks. “We’re all gonna escape. All of us.”  
I shake my head again. “Don’t do this. Please.” I’m practically pleading at this point.   
“We have to,” Alex says. “Vic, if you don’t want to come, you don’t have to. We just need information. You’ve just been here longer than we have. You know this place better. If we are going to escape, we need to know everything.”  
“I don’t know this place well,” I point out. “You two are the ones who have been sneaking around.”  
“But there’s definitely something we’ve missed,” Jack says. “Please, Vic. We can’t take it here any longer. We have to get out.”  
“My only advice?” I say as I push myself up. “Don’t. You’ll die if you try.”  
“We’ll die if we don’t,” Jack counters.   
“They’re hurting us,” Alex points out. “They’re hurting Kellin. You know this. They’re probably going to kill us eventually, even if we are good. If they don’t, we’ll probably be too broken to even fight to live anymore. ”  
“I can’t.” My voice breaks as I do so, the memories of the hallway flooding into my mind. “You know what happened. You know why I can’t. Cause we won’t be able to.”  
“We won’t if we don’t try,” Jack says. “We have to.”  
“We’re trapped and tortured here,” I beg. “But at least we’re alive. We are safe here.”  
“Alive and safe, but for how long?” Alex asks. “Until they get rid of us? Until they are tired of their little human experiment playthings?”  
“We’re never getting out of here,” I say. “You can try, but I’ve already accepted that. Dreaming only makes it worse. Trust me.”


	30. You Won’t Break Me Down

All night long, the only thing I can think about is Jack and Alex and their escape plan. I desperately want them to come to their senses and realize how stupid they are being. Trying to escape? How would that work? How could they possibly do it? I want them to realize that it’s impossible and I spoke the truth. We are never getting out of here, and that’s final. 

But what if they are completely dead set on escaping? Then do I help them? If I don’t, it could go terribly wrong and the two of them could end up dead. Do I try to escape with them? Go with their plan and have all four of us escape? Either way, if I help them or I don’t, they could still get caught. Whatever happens, it will be my fault. If I lost two of my friends, I don’t think I could ever forgive myself. I still haven’t forgiven myself from last time. I don’t think I could stand living any longer with the knowledge that more people have died all because of me. 

Kellin can tell I’m lost in thought. He sends me worried glances from across the guards come to our room, leading us out. Oh, I had forgotten about Mr. Styles’ plan. Still, I can’t bring myself to focus on what’s around me until I’m standing in front of the door to the Study room. 

The guard pushes the two of us in. Kellin sends me a worried glance as they strap the contraptions to his wrists. They don’t bother to put any on me—something that probably should bother me but doesn’t. Seeing Kellin standing between two guards, the contraptions strapped to his wrists snaps me out of my daze. He looks so small, so scared. I desperately want to run across the room and tell him that everything will be okay, but I can’t speak to him, not with the guards in the room. 

Kellin sees me watching him, and his face lights up. He lifts his hand to tap two fingers against his lips. _I love you _. I smile at the gesture, my heart fluttering as I see him do it. He remembered. I do the same back to him, grinning as he smiles at me.__

____

The smile quickly falls from my lips as Mr. Styles enters the room. He’s followed by two guards who have a boy with light brown hair in tow. He looks somewhat familiar—I must have caught glimpses of him in the Study room or in the hallway. The number M-91 is printed across his blue uniform. I remember what Alex and Jack told me about the last one of us here. This must be Craig.  
“Good to see you all here,” Mr. Styles grins. As if we had a choice. He turns to the other scientists. “We’re here to test both M-91 and M-49’s powers.” So not me. Great. I’m just a guinea pig today. 

____

He motions Craig and me forward into the center of the room. This time, there are blue foam mats set up in the center. I remember Jack and Alex telling me they’ve fought Craig before. Is that what they intend me to do? 

____

“Ready?” Mr. Styles asks. I glance up at Craig, see his cold, expressionless face. I flash him a smile, trying to be friendly, but the lines at the corners of his mouth only deepen. “Go.” 

____

I tense, waiting for him to charge, but Craig simply closes his eyes. A band of pressure tightens around my head, shards of pain slicing through my skull. Everything sounds muted around me, a ringing sounding, blocking out everything else. The pressure in my ears disorienting as exhaustion closes in on me, the sensation of being underwater growing stronger. 

____

I hear someone scream my name—probably Kellin, but he sounds far away. I must have fallen, I realize dimly. I’m so disoriented I can’t tell up from down. I feel like the wind’s been knocked out of me. I can’t seem to get up, even as I try. I reach for my powers, but they’re just not there, just an empty space where they once were. Instead, burning agony pours through my skull, making me almost scream.

____

Craig just stands there, a fire flickering at his fingertips. How did he do that? Alex’s voice sounds in my mind. He has power manipulation. Of course. That’s how he manages to beat everyone. It’s honestly a great first impression of him—I’m beginning to realize why Jack hates him so much. Surprisingly though, he doesn’t make a move toward me. I expect him to punch or burn me, but he just stands there, stoking a ball of fire in his hand as he looks toward Mr. Styles. 

____

“Five seconds,” Mr. Styles calls out, impressed. “Improvement from last time.”  
Craig nods, not taking his eyes off of me. “Thank you, sir,” he responds. I gasp for breath as the pressure lessens, my head clearing. My eyes flit over to where Kellin is standing, held back by two of the guards. He’s staring at me, wide-eyed and panicked. I want to reach over to him and comfort him, but I can’t, so I lift my hand, tapping my first two fingers against my lips surreptitiously. _I love you. I’m okay _. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Kellin relax slightly.__

______ _ _

I turn my attention back to Craig, who is still standing on the mat in front of me as I get to my feet. The flame in Craig’s hand hasn’t gone out but when I reach for my powers, I can feel them. It’s like a rush of warmth flows back into my body as a flame flickers out onto my hand, relief filling me.  
Craig sees me staring. “I can manipulate your powers,” he explains. “Just enough so I can use them, and you won’t notice, or enough to incapacitate you. It’s all my choice.” He looks proud of the fact. I can feel the pressure tighten around my skull, my powers slipping away from my grasp. I send him a questioning look. Craig shrugs, looking away from me as he walks off the mat. 

______ _ _

Mr. Styles nods, and two of the guards come forward. “Alright,” he says. “M-49, your turn.”

______ _ _


	31. Shadows Dancing In The Ash

My eyes meet Kellin’s, and I give him a little nod as the guards push me to my knees. _It’s okay _, I want to tell him. _I’m okay _. My hands shake as I strip off my shirt, the air cold against my bare skin. Even though my heart is racing in my chest and my breaths are coming in gasps, I struggle to stay calm. One of the guards pulls my hands over my head, locking them in the chains danging from the ceiling. I hate feeling trapped. I make myself take a deep breath, forcing my expression into one of neutrality. It will be over soon. Don’t freak out. I’m going to be okay. Just focus on Kellin. I have to be strong for him.____

_____ _

Internally, I’m panicking though. I tug lightly on the chains but they don’t budge. I hate feeling helpless. I try to reach my powers, but there is nothing there. It's as if they never existed in the first place. There’s no way I can fight back. My heartbeats pound in my ears as I feel my chest tightening. But I force myself to meet Kellin’s eyes as I give him a little smile. He taps his two fingers to his lips, to comfort himself or me, I’m not certain. But it does make me feel better. 

____

“Go ahead,” Mr. Styles says. Out of the corner of my eye, I see one of the guards draw his baton while the other one holds me still. In the split second before the guard hits me, I make a decision. I’m not going to give them the satisfaction of seeing me scream. 

____

It hurts so much, I have to clench my teeth in order to stop a scream of agony from slipping out. I have to stay strong. I can’t show them that I’m weak. The next blow is almost worse, as the baton collides with my shoulders. I grit my teeth, clamping down on the sound. I’ve dealt with worse pain before. I focus on Kellin standing in front of me as they hit me over and over again, swallowing my gasps of pain. 

____

By the time they stop, I must be covered in bruises, but I force myself to straighten my back, looking straight at the guard as he nears again, this time with a knife in his hands. He swallows and looks away, the action sparking a small bit of pride within me. I’m strong. I can do this. 

____

____

The knife presses against my skin, and I grit my teeth as it drags down slowly, slicing a gash across my front. Warm blood spills down my skin as he carves a line across my upper arms and down my side. I hear a commotion and look over to see Kellin struggling as the guards hold him back. His eyes are wet with tears and he’s shouting my name, but I can barely hear him over the blood pounding through my head. As his eyes meet mine, I shake my head. It’s not worth it. He stops, letting them drag him back, though he looks like he wants to rush over to me. 

____

The red-haired guard nears me again and I notice how much he’s shaking, sweat gleaming on his forehead. He honestly doesn’t look that much older than me—maybe by just a couple years.  
“I’m sorry,” I hear him whisper before he plunges the knife into my chest.

____

It just feels like a punch at first, sending the air out of my lungs. I don’t really feel any pain, but it might just be suppressed from the adrenaline racing through my system. The guard pales as he steps away, his hands shaking violently. I look down, seeing the handle protruding from just below my collar bone. I have to admit it’s a strange sight. I look up to see Kellin staring at me in horror. I try to tell him that I’m okay, but I can’t seem to speak, my whole body going numb as cold races through my skin.

____

Then the pain hits me. Heat spreads across my skin, fires racing through my whole body, even though there are none. I can’t help it—I do scream when the guard pulls the knife out. Heavy warm blood flows down my skin as I gasp for air. Someone must have undone the chains because my face is pressed against the blood-soaked blue mat before I realize it. 

____

My head spins, my vision going in and out as I gasp for breath. I can see Kellin hovering over me, his hands pressed against my skin. He’s shouting my name, but he sounds underwater, muted. It’s okay, I want to tell him, but I can’t seem to speak, my whole body screaming with pain. Darkness slowly slides over my vision and I wonder if they’d actually let me die this time. Seems like I’m going to anyway. 

____

Then it’s like someone shocks me. The weight lifts off my chest and I gasp, feeling cold energy sliding through my veins. My vision clears, and I sit up suddenly, surprised to find the pain is nearly gone. Kellin kneels in front of me, staring, his eyes wide. His hands are covered in blood from where they have been pressed against my wounds. When I run my hand over where the knife went in, I’m surprised to find just a shallow cut.  
“Oh my god,” Kellin whispers, staring at me, his eyes wide with shock. His whole body is shaking and there’s a small trickle of blood coming from his nose. Before I can say anything, he tackles me, wrapping his arms around me, not caring as my blood soaks through his shirt.  
“You did it,” I say into his shoulder, my voice muffled by his shirt. I can feel him shaking as he tightens his arms around me, not responding as he buries his face into my neck. My heart is still pounding so I let my breath out slowly, trying to calm down, the adrenaline still pumping through my system. 

____

I hear footsteps and look up, not letting go of Kellin as I see Mr. Styles nodding in approval, clapping his hands slowly. “Well done, M-49,” he says. “Well done.”

____


	32. Hope You Like The Stars I Stole For You

Kellin’s hands are cold against my warm skin as he runs his fingers gently over the bruises.  
“Do they still hurt?” he asks.  
“A bit,” I suck in my breath as his fingers trail over a particularly nasty one on my rib cage. He managed to heal some of the injuries when we were still in the Study room. The worst of the cuts have healed to shallow marks and scars and a lot of the bruises are gone.   
“I can try it again,” he offers.   
“I don’t want you to hurt yourself,” I say.  
“No, it’s okay,” he says. “What’s the whole point of having powers if I never use them?”

His hand is cold—but not uncomfortably so as he lays it gingerly over my chest. He closes his eyes, and I find myself unable to tear my eyes off of him. My eyes flicker to his lips again, and I curse myself. Why can’t I stop thinking about the kiss and how much I want to kiss him again? 

I feel a strange sensation running through my skin—almost the same as when Jack turns me invisible. But it’s more comforting, hot and cold at the same time. I let out a gasp as I feel my ribs knitting together, and the cut across my chest slowly closes.

“Wow,” I breathe. “Thank you so much.”  
Kellin opens his eyes, his cheeks turning red. “Does it feel better?”  
I nod. “Loads. Wow, you’re incredible, you know?”  
He blushes even more furiously, dropping his eyes. He doesn’t move away, though, running his hand down my chest and stomach.  
“You are,” I reach over, tipping his chin up so he’s forced to look at me. “You saved my life today.”  
“It was my fault you almost died in the first place,” he mutters, embarrassed.   
“No, it’s not,” I say. “It’s Mr. Styles and the guards. You shouldn’t be forced to use your powers.”  
His hand suddenly brushes against the old scar slashed across my skin, and I jump away, startled.   
“Sorry!” Kellin’s eyes go wide. “I didn’t mean to—”  
“It’s okay,” I struggle to control my breathing. “I just—bad memories, I guess.” Memories of the failed escape plague my mind. How are Alex and Jack going to pull it off if the last time it went so terribly wrong?  
“I don’t want to pry,” Kellin says softly. “But what happened? That’s not from today, is it?”  
I shrug, unable to meet his eyes. “No. It’s from a while ago. I got stabbed.” I know I should tell him more, but I can’t bring myself to without breaking down in front of him.   
He nods, his eyes wide, but he doesn’t press, which I’m grateful for. There’s a heaviness in the air between us that is uncomfortable, the weight of painful topics.   
“I’m sorry,” he says at last.   
“I don’t want to talk about it right now,” I sigh. He nods, his eyes never leaving mine. I’m suddenly aware of how close we are, our bodies practically pressed against each other, our foreheads nearly touching. I haven’t been this close to him we kissed and goddamn, I want to do it again. My heart is pounding in my chest, so loud I’m surprised Kellin doesn’t react. Kellin’s breaths are warm against my skin as I lean closer, ever so slightly, so our noses brushing together, our lips separated by mere inches. I want to kiss him so badly, but I stop myself, wanting to see if he moves away first. Kellin seems to notice, his breathing turning heavier as our eyes meet, red flushing over my cheeks. He moves back the tiniest bit, his eyes dropping to the bed, and I get the hint, backing away. 

“I should go now,” he murmurs at last, but he doesn’t move off of my bed.   
“No, stay,” I say as his gaze shifts up to meet mine again. I shift over on the bed, making room for him. He smiles slightly at my action, moving to lie down beside me. It’s the first time we’ve done this since I kissed him, but I’m glad he’s not awkward about it. We lie there, side by side, barely touching, but his presence is enough to comfort me. I desperately want to touch him, to take his hand or put my arm around him but I don’t. Yeah, I’m falling hard for him, aren’t I?


	33. Desperate Times and Desperate Measures

Kellin’s powers are working now. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. They sometimes drag me in to hurt me, but mostly they stick to other guards. I know they’re still hurting him, though. 

He’s been so exhausted lately. Coming back, dried blood caked in his hair, half-healed cuts lining his body. I do my best to make him comfortable, but there’s not much I can do. 

I hear his screams, even from our room. It hurts me to hear him in pain. I pace across the room, wishing everything will just stop. I don’t want to imagine what they’re doing to him. Slicing open his skin, breaking his bones, forcing himself to heal himself over and over again while watching him curiously. While they monitor his progress with plastic contraptions and shiny screens, he’s covered in his own blood.

I want to help him. I want to take his pain away, but I can’t. There’s nothing I can do while I’m trapped in the cell. I desperately wish they’d take me back, make Kellin heal me instead of himself. Let them do whatever they want to me. As long as he’s safe. 

His screams stop, and I sigh. A few more minutes and he’s gonna be back. I need to be strong for him. 

The door opens on time, and Kellin is pushed in. He looks even worse than last time, his hair matted with blood, dried blood staining his clothing. He stumbles in, and I move to catch him, cradling him in my arms. 

We don’t say anything as I bring him over to my bed, helping him lie down. I run my fingers through his hair, untangling it and smoothing it out as he leans against me, closing his eyes. He’s asleep before I know it, his breathing steady. I sigh, getting a better look at him. 

In addition to the bruises and cuts from the past week, he has a new one across his cheek, half-healed. Bruises litter his shoulders and arms, disappearing below the collar of his shirt. I can see the faded marks from other cuts and bruises, ones that weren’t there yesterday. He’s covered in marks, ones that make my stomach twist. I hate the idea of him getting hurt. 

I haven’t talked to either Jack or Alex ever since the day I told them to stop planning the escape. I don’t know if they’re avoiding me or not. Maybe they’re disappointed. They thought I was a fighter, but I’m really not. I’m just trying to stay alive here. I used to be—maybe we would’ve teamed up if it were five months ago. But I lost hope. I stopped trying. I saw no end to this place, no escape from this misery. 

But now all that’s changed. 

I don’t know why I’m so nervous. Probably because I never thought I’d try again. Not after what happened last time. I never thought I’d want to, but I have to. For Kellin’s sake, I have to get him out. He’s going to die here, eventually if he stays. They’ll crush the life out of him, take the spark of life he has away until there’s nothing left. So I’m doing this for him. He has to get out of here, and I’m willing to do whatever that takes. Even if that means facing my nightmare over and over again. 

I knock on Alex and Jack’s door. The door creaks open, and I see Alex’s curious face before he pulls me inside. 

I take a deep breath, pressing my hands together. “I want to help you escape.”


	34. Don’t Chase Your Nightmares

Alex and Jack stare at me, not comprehending. They glance at each other, perhaps wondering if I’m actually here.

I try to push away the memories and focus on the task at hand. It’s not the same, I remind myself. We’re not going to get caught. We’re going to be okay. I’m doing this for Kellin, I tell myself. This is all for him. He needs to get out of here, no matter what it takes. We all do. 

“If we’re going to do this, we’re going to do it right,” I say. “We have one shot at this, and we can’t make a mistake. All of us, all five of us are getting out, and we’re getting out together.”  
Finally, Alex nods. “Thanks, Vic,” he says.   
I shake my head. “Thank me when we’re out and alive,” I say. “There’s no guarantee there’s even a way we can.”

Two of us have escaped before—that’s what Jack tells me. M-07 and M-74, though it happened two years ago before any of us were brought here. Somehow, Jack and Alex managed to swipe the folder from the control room—I really shouldn’t be surprised by their antics at this point. 

“Does it say what their powers were?” I lean over, scanning the pages of the folder. There are two photos attached, each of a boy, both of whom look around our age. One of them has close-cropped black hair. The other one looks scruffy and has short black hair. Both of them have a kind of faraway, yet determined look in their eyes as they stare into the camera. 

“Uh, give me a sec,” Alex flips to the next page. “M-74 is listed as some sort of force field power. M-07 is unlisted. There’s just a note that says careful in bold letters”  
“Is there anything on their escape?” I ask.  
“No,” Alex says. “Just a date. Almost two years ago.”  
I lean back with a sigh. “So, there’s almost nothing to go on.”  
Jack nudges me with his shoulder. “Don’t worry. We’ll find a way.”  
“Will we?” I ask. “I really want this, believe me, guys. But we might just have to accept that we may never escape.”  
“Don’t think like that,” Alex says. “If we don’t believe we can, we will never do it.”  
“What if it’s the truth?”  
“I’ll duck tape your mouth shut,” Alex warns. “Stop being such a pessimist.”  
I can’t help but grin. “I thought you wanted my help.”  
“You can write it out,” Jack says.   
“I’ll write out my doubts. You can’t stop me.”  
Alex rolls his eyes. “Let’s just get to work.”

\---

The next few weeks fly by quickly. Every night, I meet with Jack and Alex, discussing possible escapes. The task seems so daunting. Is there really a way we can escape? My mind is buzzing with ideas all day. I’m more alert than I’ve probably ever been. I take in every position each guard is in, noticing where the vents are in each room, watching the security cameras aimed at the hallways. I force myself to remember every little detail of every room I enter. Who knows what we might need? 

We scout out the entire facility until I can navigate through it with my eyes close. It’s quite awkward with three of us since we have to remain invisible practically all the time or we’ll be caught. Sometimes, it’s just Jack and Alex exploring. Sometimes Jack and me. On the rare occasion, the three of us go together, doing a strange system of trading off with Jack while the last one of us hides. 

We explore every room, except one—the one next to the front door that’s always locked. No matter how much we try, we can’t open the door. We make a note of every vent shaft, every door, every room, drawing out a really crappy diagram that Alex hides under his mattress. There are not many possible options—the front, and the only, door is too well guarded. There are always at least four or five guards at all times. They must have upped the number after Jaime’s and my failed escape. The knowledge makes me feel sick, guilt burning in my mind.

We even try crawling into the vent shafts. It’s a quite stupid idea, but we are desperate. Jack swipes some tools and Alex flies him up so he can unscrew the grate. I wince every time a screw drops, but Alex catches it all without fail, dropping himself and Jack to the ground. 

“Ready?” Alex whispers. Jack stands at the end of the hallway, keeping watch over us. He gives us a thumbs up and Alex holds out his hands. I feel a strange push before I shoot up into the air. I can’t help but let out a yelp of surprise, clamping my hand over my mouth as I do so. My heart hammers in my chest as I grab onto the edge of the vent, wincing as the rough metal scraps against my hands. The air pushes up again, giving me enough of a boost to swing my legs over the side, climbing into the narrow vent. 

“You good?” Alex calls.  
“Yep,” I call back, my whole body shaking. There isn’t enough space for me to turn around and see him. I flick a flame into existence, peering down as far as I can into the vent. Alex said he’d catch me if I fell, but honestly, I’m not certain if he could react in time. 

The vent is narrow and dark. I can’t keep the fire going and crawl at the same time, so I feel my way through, my hands sliding through a thick layer of dust. From what I can tell, the vent only goes one way. I inhale, then regret it as my eyes water and I cough, the sound echoing through the vent. 

I feel air flowing past me and crawl out into an opening of some sort. Vents extend in three directions, one in front of me, one extending to my left, one to my right. There’s enough space for me to sit up slightly, glancing around me in the darkness. The vents to my left and right are covered by grates, but I can see that the vents are too small for me to crawl through, so I continue following the one ahead. 

It feels like I’m crawling forever before I see a faint light shining through the end. I peer through it, seeing just a concrete floor below.

“Hello?” I call out quietly. I can’t see Jack or Alex from the grate.   
“Vic?” I hear Alex as footsteps near. Alex comes into view, looking around. He scans the ceiling until he sees the grate, his eyes lighting up. “Anything?”  
I shake my head. “No. It’s a dead end. Just goes across the hallway. There are two vents branching off but they are too small for even me to climb through.”  
Alex sighs. “Guess we have to trash this plan too.”

It’s much more difficult crawling backward. I curse a few times as my shoulder hits the wall, the sound echoing through the vents. I freeze, but I don’t hear the guards. At last, I reach the junction where I can comfortably turn around, crawling as fast as I can toward the opening where the grate was. As I prepare to swing myself over the side, I hear footsteps. 

Alex looks up at me, his eyes wide. He puts a finger to his lips. “Guards,” he mouths at me. 

Jack grabs Alex’s hand and the two of them disappear just as the guard rounds the corner. I freeze, drawing back into the vent so I can see him walk beneath me. I tense as he stops, glancing around. Please don’t look up. Please don’t look up. I swear my heart is pounding so loud the sound must be echoing through the vents.

Finally, the guard shakes his head, ambling down the hallway away from us. I breathe out a sigh of relief, my arms shaking. Alex and Jack shimmer into appearance below. We don’t speak as I shakily move from where I’ve been crouched for the last few minutes. I swing my legs over the side and jump, feeling the air rush around me, gently lowering me the last few feet. 

I practically collapse, the adrenaline rushing through my veins, my whole body shaking. Somehow, the three of us manage to get to Jack and Alex’s room where we crash to the floor, gasping for breath and laughing.

“I’m never doing that again,” I gasp. “That was terrible.”  
“That was way too close for comfort,” Alex agrees.   
“He almost looked up at me,” I say. “I’m shaking so much.  
“Me too,” Jack says.   
“You weren’t in the vent!”   
“Speaking of being in the vent, Vic, you’re covered in dust.”  
“Am I?” I look down at myself to see the layer of dust and dirt caked to my clothing and skin. “Think there’s time to sneak into the showers?” I ask. “I might need to change.”   
“Oh my god,” Alex bursts out laughing again. “I didn’t even notice until now.”  
“How bad is it?” I ask as Jack starts laughing again. “Hey! It’s not my fault. You guys made me!”  
“Just ‘cause you’re so small,” Alex points out. “We wouldn’t have fit.”   
I cross my arms in front of my chest, frowning at them, but I can’t hold up the facade for long.   
“Jeez, what happened?” Alex asks, suddenly.   
I look down to see my hands and knees wet with blood. “I must have scraped them on the edge of the vent,” I say. “I didn’t even notice until now.”  
“Well, I guess we’re gonna have to steal a first aid kit now and get you to the showers,” Alex says. “Anyone up for more excitement tonight?”  
“C’mon,” Jack says, grabbing my hand as the three of us run toward the end of the hall. Despite the many failed ideas, we are still riding high on a wave of determination and energy. At least for now.


	35. Our Song Has Not Been Sung

“Does Kellin have any ideas about the escape?” Jack asks. I freeze at his words. To be honest, it had completely slipped my mind. Kellin had been so tired for the past few weeks. As soon as he came back from Study, he’d practically collapse and I’d have to catch him, carrying him to his bed. But that is just a stupid excuse. If I had actually wanted to tell him, I would have remembered in the last few weeks. The truth is, I don’t want him to know.   
“No,” I mutter, but Jack catches on quickly.  
“You haven’t told him?” Jack asks incredulously.  
I shake my head, fiddling with the pen in my hand, avoiding Jack’s questioning gaze.   
“Why not?” Jack asks.  
“If Jack kept something like that from me, I’d punch him,” Alex says.   
“I know,” I mutter. “It’s selfish, I know.”  
“Then why haven’t you told him?” Jack asks.   
“Because I’m scared that it will go wrong and we’ll get caught,” I burst out. “If we do, I want him to have at least some deniability. That way he won’t get punished with the rest of us. Yeah, maybe he’ll be trapped but at least he’ll be alive, right?”  
Alex shakes his head. “I still think you need to tell him.”  
I sigh. “I will, okay? Just not now.”  
“When though?” Jack asks.  
I shrug. “I don’t know. I just want to keep him safe.”  
“You can’t keep this from him forever,” Alex points out. “He could help us.”  
“I know,” I say. “But until we have a full plan out, I want to keep this from him. He hasn’t been here as long as the rest of us have. I don’t want him to get his hopes up, only for them to be crushed again.”

\---

“Where have you been?” Kellin asks as I slip back into the room. I freeze, looking over at where he’s lying in his bed. He’s awake for once, looking up at me.   
“What do you mean?” I ask.   
Kellin shifts so he’s propped up on one elbow. “You’re always gone every night after I fall asleep,” he says. “I wake up sometimes in the middle of the night and you’re just gone.”  
I’m not sure how to respond, so I just keep standing there, staring at him.   
“I know you’re keeping secrets from me,” he continues. “So, what’s going on?”  
“Nothing,” I say. “There’s nothing going on.” I hate lying to him, but I don’t want to tell him the truth either. That way, he can claim deniability in case this all goes wrong. I don’t want him to get hurt. I want to tell him all this. That he’s the reason we are searching for an escape. But if I tell him, he could get punished if it all goes wrong. It’s safer for him if he doesn’t know. So I keep my mouth shut.   
He just raises an eyebrow at me, telling me he can see through my fairly obvious lie. It’s hard to miss how his eyes travel to my scratched up knees and the bandages on my hands. Thankfully, he doesn’t press though.   
“Whatever.” Kellin shakes his head. “It doesn’t matter anyway.” I want to reach out and close the growing distance between us, but I don’t. It’s better if he doesn’t know. He’s safer that way. 

\---

The determination to get free has kept us going for so long. But at last, our energy has run out, our morales low. There really doesn’t seem to be any way for us to escape. 

“We’ve explored this whole place,” Alex sighs. “What if there really isn’t a way to escape?”   
“So we’re just giving up?” Jack tosses his pen across the room. “This is it, huh? We’re done?”  
“Jack—” I reach over, but he brushes my hand away.  
“No, really. You were the one who came up with the idea,” he fumes at Alex. “And now you quit? We’re just going to live here until we die?”  
“No,” Alex starts, but Jack keeps talking.  
“You were the one to drag the rest of us in,” he points out. “You can’t just give up.”

“What if we asked the guards?” I ask.   
Both of them turn and look at me.   
“I mean, what else do we have to lose?” I ask. “Some of them feel bad for us.”  
“If you’re talking about what I think you are,” Alex says, “He just felt bad because he had to stab you.”  
I roll my eyes at him. “C’mon. Seriously. They’re military, aren’t they? I don’t think they had the choice to come here.”  
Jack looks thoughtful. “Maybe,” he says. Alex gives him a doubtful look. “Lex, please? What else are we going to do?”  
Alex hesitates, then nods. “Don’t blame me if it all goes sideways,” he mutters.  
“I don’t think it will,” Jack says. “Between my awesomeness and the brains that you guys have, I think we’re gonna be okay.”  
“Did Jack just give us a compliment?” I wonder out loud, making Alex smirk.  
“Hey, it’s still probably gonna be because of my awesomeness,” Jack defends himself. “But fine. It was sorta a compliment.”  
“I’ll take that over nothing,” Alex grins. “Okay, let’s do this.”


	36. I Think It’s Time That We Believe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm gonna try to keep my upload schedule, but since my school is starting, it might get a bit chaotic. Sorry in advance lol.

It’s not hard to find the redhead guard. I quickly spot him, standing beside the front door, talking to two others. It’s strange to wonder what it might be like if our positions were switched. Maybe I shouldn’t be feeling bad for him, but I do. He’s human, just like we are. 

“That one,” I hiss at Jack. “The one with the red hair.”  
I don’t see Jack nod, but he tugs on my hand, leading me to the supply closet where Alex is waiting.   
“Found him,” Jack reports. He looks at me. “Ready?”   
“Why am I the one going out there?” I whisper back.   
“Cause you came up with the plan.”  
I roll my eyes at him but I can’t disagree. “Here goes nothing,” I mutter as Jack and I duck out of the supply closet, peering around the corner at the two guards.   
“Ready?” Jack hisses as we crouch behind the corner. I nod, taking a deep breath before I let go of Jack’s hand, becoming visible. We’re in a blind spot from the security cameras, but if I step around the corner, the cameras will see me. I wait until I see the faint shimmer of Jack heading back to the closet where Alex is before I step out.

Fishing the pen out of my pocket, I throw it as hard as I can at them. The clunk it makes when it hits the door right behind them makes everyone freeze, including me.  
“What the—” One of them mutters.   
“Where did that come from?” The red-haired one asks.   
“I don’t know,” the dark-haired one says.   
The radio crackles, making me jump.  
“We have someone on the loose,” the radio garbles. “Dawson, check the hallways. Mullins, the rooms. Radke, stay in position. Everyone, be prepared. We don’t know who this is.” I hold my breath as I duck back around the corner as the guard nears.  
“Hey,” I call. The guard spins around, his eyes wide. I know he can’t see me from where I’m crouched, but he steps closer to the dark corner, his hand reaching for his gun.   
“In here,” I whisper. A few steps closer and he’ll be out of sight from the cameras. The guard pulls out his gun, the sight of it making me tense. If he shoots now, then I’m a goner. He steps forward again.  
“That’s it,” I say again. He frowns, but heeds my instructions, stepping right out of sight. 

The next few things happen in an instant. He steps closer, his gaze falling on me. His eyes widen and he reaches for his radio, just as his eyes roll back and he slumps to the floor. I jump, my heart pounding, but something catches him before he makes a sound. I can hear Jack grunt at the impact, the guard going invisible as Jack drags him to the supply closet. 

I stand up, shaking my arms and legs out as Jack grabs my hand, dragging me to the supply closet. The guard is visible but unconscious, his radio crackling.   
I grab it just as the voice rings out. “Mullins, anything?”  
Alex gestures at me wildly, and I hold down the button. “Nothing here. Everything seems normal.” I wince as I hear my voice, hoping the audio is garbled enough by the bad connection that I sound like him.   
“Okay, clear then,” the voice says. “Return to your normal post.” I click off the radio, pushing the antenna down. 

“We probably have a few minutes before they notice he’s gone,” I say.   
“We’ll make it quick,” Alex says. “He’s waking up anyway.”

Sure enough, the guard is stirring, blinking confusedly at us. He reaches for his gun, but Alex is already holding it. 

“Don’t make a sound,” Alex’s cold voice cuts through the air as he holds the guard down. “Or I’ll slit your throat.” I raise my eyebrows at him, gesturing to the gun he’s holding. Alex shrugs.  
“I’ll find a way to do it,” he mouths at me.  
“Damn, Alex. Chill,” Jack says, reappearing. The guard’s eyes widen as he takes in the three of us. “You’re not gonna let me do it?”  
“If you insist,” Alex grins at Jack.  
“I’ve been waiting to for a long time,” Jack replies.   
“Okay, since these two are idiots,” I say. “Let’s start again. You know who we are.”  
“I was under orders,” he pleads. “I promise I wouldn’t have hurt you if I didn’t have to.”  
“I know,” I try to calm him down. “It’s okay. That’s not why we’re here.”  
He looks at me, confused. “Then why do you need me?”  
I take a deep breath. “We are going to escape.”

His eyes go wide. “Why are you telling me this?” he asks. “Don’t you know I could turn you in?”  
“You wouldn’t.” I’m calling his bluff. “I saw how you reacted when you had to stab me. You know what we go through here. You know what they would do to punish us if they knew.”  
He sighs. “Then why are you telling me this?”  
“We need information,” I say. “Please.”  
“I don’t think you have a choice,” Alex snarls. “You tell us or Vic will burn your face off.”  
“Jeez, Alex, chill,” I elbow him. “No one is burning anyone’s face off, especially not me.”  
“I can’t, I’m sorry,” the guard pleads. “Please, I would help you escape if I could.”  
“Please,” I say again. I’m practically begging now. “We really have no choice. We wouldn’t be doing this if we didn’t have to. You’ve seen how we’re treated. How we are tortured every day. Please help us. We’re not asking for much.”  
The guard hesitates, but I can tell I’ve won him over. “Fine,” he says. “What do you need?”


	37. Tear It Down, Break The Barricade

The guard’s name is Matty. I was right—he is only 22, just barely four years older than I am. 

“Most of us aren’t here by choice,” Matty explains. “A lot of us were drafted. After people like you were discovered—people with powers, the government became terrified. They drafted a lot of people. Some of us were sent here—to this facility.”  
“Are there more of us?” I ask. “Other facilities?”  
Matty shrugs. “Possibly. This is the only one I’ve heard of. But it might be that there are more of you who are just hiding out. No one is really certain of anything.”  
“Were you drafted?” Alex asks.  
Matty shakes his head. “No. I volunteered.” He sees the expression on our faces and laughs. “Not because of that,” he says. “I have—had a little sister. She was one of you. After she was taken away, I volunteered to try to find her and save her.”  
I exchange a glance with Alex, shocked.  
“She’s not here,” Matty sighs. “If she’s still alive, I’m not sure what happened to her.”   
“I’m sorry,” I say. I know exactly how it feels, the guilt and hopelessness. The feeling that I should have done more, even though there was nothing else to do. “My little brother disappeared—he’s not one of us but I never found out what happened to him.”  
Matty looks sympathetic. “If I can’t do anything to help her, I might as well help you,” he says.   
“So, do you think there is any way for us to escape?” Alex asks.   
Matty looks uncertain. “I don’t think so,” he admits. “There’s only one entrance and it’s heavily guarded. I’d have to check with the other guards. Don’t worry, I won’t say anything about you,” he adds hastily, seeing Alex tense up.  
“Really, anything you can do is helpful,” I say.   
“I can meet you here tomorrow night,” Matty replies.   
“Thank you,” I say. “I’m really sorry for all of this.”  
“Honesty,” he says. “I would’ve helped you anyway. I’d help you because that’s what a good person should do.”

\---

It’s not just Matty who feels this way. The next day, he brings with him another guard. The three of us freeze as we see the two of them enter. 

“Who the hell is this?” Alex growls, pushing himself up from the wall.  
“Relax,” Matty holds up his hands. “He’s a old friend.”  
“What kind of friend?” Alex asks. “The kind who will turn us in?”  
“Alex, chill,” Jack says, reaching over to grab his boyfriend. “Let the man speak.”  
“This is Rian,” Matty says. “And no. He wouldn’t. I trust him with my life.”  
“Hi,” Rian says. He gives us a small wave.   
“Why are you doing this?” Alex asks, his posture stiff.   
“Because it’s the right thing to do,” Rian says. “You didn’t do anything wrong to deserve being locked up. Anyway, I’ve known Matty for a long time. His little sister was practically like a little sister to me. When he told me his plan, I went with him, but you know how that turned out. So I might as well help you guys out.” Alex relaxes slightly as I nudge him, giving him a glare.  
“So, what do you need?” Matty asks.   
“If we could get you outside, you could make a break for it,” Rian says. “Across the field?”  
“It’s too risky,” Jack says. “I can’t turn that many people invisible at once. They’d spot us and start shooting immediately.” 

“How many people are in the control room at once?” I inquire.   
“At least four,” Rian says. “Matty and I couldn’t manage to hijack it.”  
“Could we get any other guards in on it?” Jack asks.  
Rian shakes his head. “Most of them are okay with what’s happening here,” he says somberly. “You were lucky you found us. Everyone else probably would’ve turned you in. To get a promotion and all.”  
“They would do that?” I ask.  
“You have too much faith in them,” Rian laughs. “Most of them think it’s right for you to be locked up in here. Especially Radke.”  
“Who?” I ask.   
“Black hair, silver pin,” Rian says. “He’s an officer. Got promoted a while ago.”  
“Oh, him,” Jack smiles proudly. “I’ve pissed him off enough times.”  
“You have,” Rian says, grimacing. “He’s ranted about you enough. He hates your guts.”  
“Well, I hate his.”  
“What did you do?” I ask.  
“Every so often I sneak into his room and destroy a few things,” Jack says. “I’m always back in my room before he knows though. He’s never been able to prove it’s was me.”  
Matty shakes his head. “You’re trouble, you know?”  
Jack winks. “I know. But he’s an ass. He deserves it.”  
“What did he do?” Rian asks.   
Jack grimaces. “He’s my half brother. And the one who turned me in.”  
Heavy silence follows as we process the information. Alex slips his hand into Jack’s squeezing it, comforting him. From the look on Alex’s face, he already knew.   
“I’m sorry,” Rian says at last. “Man, that sucks.”  
“Yeah.” Jack shrugs, then nods. He looks eager to change the subject. “So, did Matty fill you in?”  
“I think so,” Rian says. “You need a way out, right?”  
“We’ve tried everything,” I sigh. “There’s only one door. No windows. The vent shafts are too small and the ones that we can fit in don’t lead anywhere.”  
“How did you get into the vent shaft?” Matty asks, confused. “They’re on the ceiling. Not to mention screwed shut.”  
Jack holds up a screwdriver. “Alex can fly and Vic is small,” he responds. “I’m just good at stealing tools.”  
“We were determined,” Alex says. “But now we’ve run out of options. We’re stuck.”  
“There’s—” Matty looks over at Rian, silently confirming something before continuing. “I found this out last night. But there’s actually one window in this place.”  
“Really?” I ask, sending a glance at Jack and Alex, who both shrug. What did we miss? “Where?”   
“In Mr. Styles’ office,” Rian says.

“He has an office?” Jack exclaims.   
“I guess that makes sense,” Alex mutters. “But how the hell did we miss it?”  
“It’s the locked door,” I realize. “The one that we could never get into.”  
“Yeah, why couldn’t we?” Jack asks. “We got into the control room.”  
“Because that’s where Styles keeps his personal stuff,” Rian says. “Family photos and all.”  
“He keeps those in the Facility?” Alex asks.   
Matty shrugs. “Something about his son,” he says. “That’s why he’s so invested in this.” I frown, my thoughts whirling in my mind. I never knew about this. He’s never mentioned it.   
“So, tomorrow night?” Rian asks. “Matty can unlock the door and meet you out there. I monitor from the control room—that’s my shift tomorrow.”  
“Sounds like a plan,” Alex says, giving Rian and fist bump. “See you tomorrow, team.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Sighs*
> 
> Okay...so I know it's not true in real life, but just go along with it? Please? I promise it's necessary for the plot and characters and etc. :)
> 
> On a side note, Look!
> 
> A wild Rian Dawson has appeared.


	38. I’m Gonna Break Down These Walls

I’m shaking as my door opens. Jack and Alex are waiting for me on the other side. The three of us head off together. We don’t speak in fear of being heard. Rian is in the control room, monitoring the footage. He is watching over to make sure no one is headed our way, making sure the cameras don’t pick up any sign of us. But the three of us still stick to the shadows, crouching just out of view. 

We go through the lower hall, sneaking just past the Dark Room. The front door looms at the end of the hall, four guards surrounding it as usual. I peek around the corner as one of them lights a cigarette, breathing out a plume of smoke into the air. 

I look over at Alex, who nods and the three of us run across the hallway toward the door to Mr. Styles’ office. We duck into the shadows, crouching just out of sight. I press my back against the wall, holding my breath as one of the guards looks over toward where we are hiding. He doesn’t seem to see us, since he turns back to his companions, seemingly satisfied. 

Jack tries the knob, which thankfully isn’t locked. Matty kept his word then. The door swings open and the three of us hurry inside, shutting the door as quietly as we can behind us. Alex quickly pulls down the shade, shielding us from view.

“Clear,” a voice crackles and the three of us jump. I spin around, flames roaring to life in my hands.   
“It’s just me,” Matty says softly. “Rian turned off the camera in here.” I nod, relaxing, letting the flames go out.   
“So this is our exit?” I ask, tilting my head to the giant window spanning the top half of the back wall.   
Matty nods. “As far as I know, the only window and possible exit other than the front door.”  
“Is it locked?” Alex asks.  
Matty holds up a dark object which I recognize to be a pair of wire cutters. “There’s a grate across it. The window itself should be just a simple latch.”  
“You coming with us?” Jack asks.  
Matty shakes his head. “I’ll keep guard over here. Just be careful, okay? Don’t be seen.”  
Alex nods, taking the wire cutters. “Here goes nothing,” he mutters, holding his hands out in front of him. I watch as he zooms upward, balancing on the air next to the grate. I hear the quiet snip of the wire cutters as the wire is pried away. Alex curses as he wobbles in the air before he steadies himself.  
“You okay?” Jack calls.   
“Fine,” Alex says. He lets himself fall, catching himself just before he hits the ground. Alex hands Matty the wire cutters. “Shall we?” he asks. Jack doesn’t respond, just wraps his arm around Alex’s shoulders. The two of them rocket up into the air, balancing next to the sill. Alex holds open the grate so the two of them can climb through. He gives me a little wave as the two of them drop down, out of sight. I hold my breath, expecting to hear shouts and yells of guards, but there’s only silence. 

Alex suddenly appears in the window as he crawls through, dropping down to the ground. “Ready?” he asks me.   
I let out my breath. “Yep.”   
“Just hold on to me,” Alex instructs as I wrap my arm around his shoulders. He puts his arms around my waist and closes his eyes. We shoot up into the air until we’re next to the window. This time it’s a lot smoother than the time I climbed into the vents. The window is open just enough for me to get through. The cold air rushing through makes my teeth chatter, but it feels refreshing nonetheless. Alex holds open the grate as I crawl through quickly, my arm scraping against the wire. I sit on the sill, my legs dangling over the two-story drop on the other side. Jack waves up at me from where he’s pressed against the side of the building, directly below me.   
“Ready?” Alex asks, climbing next to me. He grabs my arms as he jumps, pulling me down to the ground with him. 

The mud squelches beneath our shoes as we land, the earthy smell rising to greet us. Jack grabs my arm, yanking me against the building just as a floodlight sweeps across the ground, the light barely missing us. 

I’m outside. It’s the first time I’ve been outside in over a year. I can’t help but smile, breathing in the fresh cold air as I take in my surroundings. The trees stretching their leafless limbs up toward the dark, cloud-covered sky. A breeze rattles the branches, the cold air making goosebumps prickle up our arms. Alex shivers next to me, his teeth chattering.   
“It’s so cold,” he mutters. It’s cold for me too, but manageable—probably my fire powers keeping me warm.   
“C’mon.” Jack motions us forward and we creep around the side of the gray concrete building, keeping our backs pressed to the wall. The ground is soggy with puddles and half-melted patches of snow, turning brown from the mud, dead grass poking up from the ice. 

We crouch in the shadows, peering around the corner. The front door is brightly lit in front of it. I can see the shapes of the guards standing inside. They look calm, not panicked. I breathe out a sigh of relief. That means they haven’t noticed our absence, at least not yet. 

“We could get everyone out through the window,” Jack says. “Get them to here?”  
“We’d never make it across the yard,” I point out. A giant barbed wire fence surrounds the desolate field, spiked wire pointing up at the cover of trees. “We’d have to go one by one, right? It’d take too long. They’d shoot us down.” Even from where we are crouching, we can see the shape of guards patrolling the roof.   
Jack sighs in frustration. “I’m trying to see if I can turn two people invisible,” he says. “It’s not working though.”  
“And even if we managed to get under the trees, Alex would be too tired to fly us over the fence. We’d be sitting ducks.”  
“Wire cutters?”  
“No, it’s electrified. Matty said that,” I say. “And since none of us have electricity powers—” my mind flashes to Jaime again. Not for the first time, I wish he was here. “Maybe if we asked Rian or Matty to turn it off.”  
“Maybe,” I say. “That might work. But it would still be very risky.”

Silence ensures, but we’re all content with staring at our surroundings. After being inside for so long, even the barren yard and the grimness of the Facility seems strangely beautiful. 

“We should go,” Alex mutters at last.  
“Yeah,” I respond, still unable to tear my eyes away from the still dark sky. 

We slink along the side of the Facility, one by one back to the open window. As Alex flies Jack up, I stare at the trees and the electric fence trapping us inside. For a second, I think I glimpse a flicker of red, but it’s gone before I can get a closer look.   
“Did you see something?” Alex whispers, dropping to the ground beside me.   
“It’s probably nothing,” I say. “Let’s go.”

As I climb back through the window, I can’t help but glance behind me one last time. I can still feel a whisper of the fresh air on my skin as I’m lowered to the ground. 

The grate rattles as Alex closes it, latching the window shut behind him. He looks exhausted as he lowers himself to the ground, his face pale. Flying everyone up and down must have taken a toll on him. He stumbles slightly and Jack catches him.   
“I’m fine,” he mutters just before his eyes roll up and he collapses into Jack’s arms.  
“Drama queen,” Jack sighs, lifting Alex up. I run over to support Alex on the other side as we carry him back to his and Jack’s room. 

As I shut their door, Matty is waiting to lead me back to my room.   
“Thanks,” I say. “You’ve done so much for us.”  
He shakes his head. “Don’t mention it. I’m just glad I could help in some way.”


	39. My Hopes Are Severed By The Downside

I sit on the edge of my bed, swinging my legs back and forth as I wait. The guards should be coming any minute to take me to Study. I look up as the door swings open, jumping to my feet. I stare at the doorway, expecting to see a guard, but there’s no one there.  
“Jack?” I call out gingerly. “What—” a hand clamps over my mouth. Jack shimmers into appearance, ducking behind the open door. I raise my eyebrows at him and he puts a finger to his lips. He holds up his hand, showing me the word scrawled there in messy permanent marker. 

Microphones.

I mime a look of confusion, and he grabs my hand, pulling me down the hallway. Surprisingly, there are no guards, even though it’s almost noon. I think he’s going to lead me to his and Alex’s room, but he opens the door of a supply closet instead, shoving us in. 

We don’t speak until the door is shut.   
“What do you mean?” I whisper.   
“I was snooping around the control room upstairs where they have the security footage. I usually delete footage of the doors opening,” he explains. “Usually, they just have footage of outside and the hallways. But I found a link to the audio in room five.” My blood runs cold.   
“How long have they been listening?” I ask.   
“I don’t know,” he says. “Not that long. I’m assuming it started when they first caught the two of you.”  
“Make sure there’s none for your room,” I say. “If they’ve heard our conversations—” I shudder at the thought. If they find out we are planning an escape, we’ll be dead before sunrise.   
Jack nods. “We don’t know how much they know.”  
“I have to get back to my room before they come for me for Study,” I say. “Be careful, okay?”  
Jack nods. “You too,” he says. He glances down the hallways, judging it to be clear before he pushes open the door. I move to step out, but I hear a shout and freeze.

“Stop right there!” The officer shouts. I pray that it’s either Matty or Rian, but it’s not. This officer has dark hair, a silver pin reflecting the light from the florescent lights.   
“Shit!” Jack looks at me wildly. We’re wondering the same thing. What now?  
“Hide or run?” I whisper.   
“M-52, I know you’re in there,” the officer says. Officer Radke. The new knowledge that he’s Jack’s half brother weighs heavily on me. Jack’s face pales as he glances at me.

The door is flung open wider, Officer Radke standing silhouetted by the bright lights in front of us.“What do you think you’re doing?” Officer Radke barks.  
“Uh, you know,” Jack raises an eyebrow. “The usual stuff.”  
Officer Radke doesn’t look impressed. “You know what the consequences for using your powers are, right?”  
I’m not even sure what it is, but it must be bad because Jack pales. “Yes, sir,” he mutters. I’m not certain if he says it ironically or not.   
“Well then,” Officer Radke has a smirk on his face. “We better get moving.”  
“Wait,” I say. “It was my idea. I was the one who suggested it.” Jack shakes his head at me, but I press forward. “I told him to. Leave him out of it. It was my fault.”  
“Ah,” Officer Radke says. “But it wasn’t you who used your powers, was it?” He grabs Jack by the arm, dragging him down the hallway. 

“No, I—” I raise my hand, ready to summon the flames, but someone grabs my arm, forcing me to turn.   
“Stop,” Matty says. “You’ll only make it worse.”  
“I can’t just let him hurt Jack,” I say, struggling to get away.  
Matty’s grip tightens on my arm as he holds me down the hallway toward my room. “Don’t fight me,” he warns. “There’s nothing you can do.” I give Jack a helpless look as the door is wrenched open and I’m thrown inside.


	40. Nightmares No Longer Wait For Sleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy frickkkkk Obey by Bring Me The Horizon with YUNGBLUD is really good. Also, the music video has me dying lmfao it's amazing. I didn't know I needed giant gay robots in my life until now.

I don’t hear anything from Jack or Alex all day long. What’s worse is that I don’t hear anything from the guards either. Everything seems completely normal. Neither Mr. Styles nor the guards mention anything about last night. I scan the hallways when I’m taken to and from the Study room, hoping to catch a glimpse of either Alex or Jack, but there’s no one. 

I stand in the center of my room, running a hand through my hair. What to do now? Kellin’s not back yet. I hope he’s okay. If I could somehow sneak out of my room, I’d go see if Alex and Jack are okay, but I can’t.  
“Crap,” I mutter. What do I do now? If Jack—no, they wouldn’t kill him for this. Probably just lock him in the Dark Room, right? But if he was in there, I would be able to hear it from my room. 

I hear a creak and spin around to see Alex sliding out from under my bed.  
“What the hell?” I hiss, forgetting for a moment about the microphones. “What are you doing here A—”  
Alex waves his hand frantically at me, and I catch myself. “Kellin, you scared me,” I cover quickly. “What’s going on?” I mouth at Alex. He hands me a piece of paper, and I unfold it. 

_Jack’s really injured, and I think he’s going to die. I really need your and Kellin’s help. I can unlatch the door for you guys to sneak out. I understand if you can’t, but please. I’m so scared he’s going to die. ___

____

____

____

Alex looks at me pleadingly. I pat down my pockets, fishing out a pen I swiped from the Study room before scribbling my answer. 

____

____

____

_I’ll try. I’ll talk to Kellin. Jack’s gonna be fine. ___

____

______ _ _

____

Alex looks relieved. “Thank you,” he mouths at me. 

____

______ _ _

____

“Be careful.” The words slip out before I can stop them. I’ve seen too many people I care about get injured because of me. If Jack—no. Kellin can save him. But that’s only if he agrees to help. I push the thoughts away. Jack is gonna be okay, I tell myself. He’s going to be fine. 

____

______ _ _

____

Alex nods at me before he slips out of the room. I hold my breath, waiting to hear a guard yelling, but there’s nothing but silence. 

____

______ _ _

____

\---

____

______ _ _

____

I scour my entire room for microphones. I run my hands along the frame of the beds, searching in the cracks and crevices of the walls. There’s nothing. Not for the first time, I wish Jaime was here. He would be able to sense where they were. At last, I give up, leaning against the wall as I wait for Kellin to come back. Jack’s life could be slipping away slowly

____

______ _ _

____

After what seems like forever, the door opens again and Kellin comes in. I don’t wait for him to speak before I grab him, pulling him with me. The guard gives me a confused look as I push past him, but I beckon to the towels in my hands, and he seems to understand. Usually, I’d be terrified about lying, but at this point, I really don’t care.  
“What’s going on?” Kellin asks after the door to the bathroom slams shut behind him. I don’t respond, just let go of his arm and drop the towels on the bench. He moves toward the other stall, but I grab his hand, pulling him with me toward the first stall. 

____

______ _ _

____

“What—” Kellin starts to say as I go to the next stall turning on the water at full blast. Cold water spurts out of the faucet, drenching me as I go back to the first one, yanking the curtain shut. I turn on the water here too, hearing Kellin gasp in surprise as the cold water hits him. I try not to focus on the way his wet shirt clings to his body, my face going red. I push the thoughts away, focusing on the task at hand.

____

______ _ _

____

“Vic, what’s going on?” Kellin asks.  
I brush my wet hair out of my face. “It’s hard to explain, but our room is bugged.”  
“Bugged?”  
“We’re being recorded. No cameras, though,” I add quickly.  
“Why?” he asks.  
I shrug. “I don’t know.” Kellin’s eyes narrow, and I wonder if he can tell I’m lying, so I push on. “Kellin, I need your help.”  
“With what?” Kellin asks.  
“There’s a lot I need to tell you, but you know the others that are here? I’ve been meeting with them. One of them is really injured and he really needs your help.”  
Kellin nods, processing the information.  
“Can you try to heal him?” I plead. “It’s my fault he got injured. He came to warn me that the room is bugged. He was punished for it and I wasn’t.” Kellin’s eyes widen, confusion in his gaze.  
“I know it’s risky and we could get caught,” I continue. “And really, I understand if you don’t want to do this.”  
“I will,” Kellin says.  
“Really?” I breathe out a sigh of relief. “Thank you.”  
“But Vic,” Kellin mutters. “What aren’t you telling me? ” I flinch at his words. A lot. That’s the truth. There’s so much I haven’t told him, I realize. So much I’ve been keeping hidden from him.  
“Their names are Jack and Alex,” I explain. “I first met them when you were injured. They were helping me try to help you with your powers.” It’s a partial truth, but I can’t quite bring myself to tell him the actual one.  
“Did you not want me to meet them?” Kellin asks. “I understand if that’s true. I was just wondering why.” He’s shaking slightly, and I want to reach out to him, but I don’t think he’d want me to. A small part of me screams inside my mind. Why am I not telling him? It’s stupid, isn’t it? Trying to protect him in case we fail? So he has deniability if something like this happened and everything went sideways? The whole reason I agreed to help was because of Kellin. It makes no sense that I’m keeping it from him.  
“We were planning an escape,” I say quietly.

____

______ _ _

____

The pain that flashes across Kellin’s face is like a stab wound to my chest, and trust me, I know what it feels like. He nods, avoiding my gaze as if he’s realized something.  
“Wow,” he says softly. “I shouldn’t have assumed you were different.” It honestly would have stung less if he had slapped me instead.  
“Kellin—” I start.  
“I’ll heal him,” Kellin interrupts me. “But I don’t know if I can trust you anymore.”

____

______ _ _

____


	41. Never Make It In Our Vicious Little World

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I just finished writing this book *insert confetti* yay! This is probably the most productive I've ever been (I can't believe I finished it in three weeks omg that's a new record for me)
> 
> After I finish uploading it, I'll be editing this and stuff. Hopefully, book 2 won't take too long to write! 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading/commenting/voting and everything! It means so much to me.

Surprisingly, the hallways are empty as Kellin follows me, keeping close enough behind, but staying far enough away. We slip past the empty rooms and up the stairwell. Our footsteps echo as we sprint down the hallway, skidding to a stop at Jack and Alex’s room, out of breath. I rap on the door three times softly, my heart pounding in my chest. I’m confident the guards have heard us—they’re probably just around the corner. Kellin watches me, but he doesn’t try to comfort me like he usually would.  
“C’mon,” I mutter, glancing around anxiously. If we get caught and Kellin gets hurt—I don’t know what I would do. I’m desperate and I know that this is stupid, but it’s my fault Jack got caught. I should have been more careful. 

A part of me knows I’m being unreasonable. He came to warn me about the microphones in my room. There was no way I could have predicted that. I tried to take the fall for it, but Officer Radke was intent on punishing Jack for it. I wonder what’s the story there—Jack did say they were half-brothers. I know that I wouldn’t stand having my brother trapped here, let alone injuring him. So there’s probably a story behind that. But I don’t want to force Jack into telling me—something hurtful probably happened, something he does not want to talk about and I’ll respect that. There’s a lot I don’t want to talk about—a lot that I still haven’t told Kellin, not like he would care now that he hates me. 

But still, a part of me wonders if it really was my fault. The microphones were only installed after Kellin and I were caught. If I hadn’t tried to get close to him—no that wouldn’t have worked either. It was only after they hurt me that he could use his powers. I’m caught in an endless standstill, wondering whether or not I should take the blame for something I had no control in.

I breathe out a sigh of relief as Alex unlatches the door, his face pale as he pulls us in. “Thank you,” he blurts out.  
“Where is he?” I ask instead of greeting him. The adrenaline and worry pulsing through my veins are getting to me. I’m shaking like a leaf caught in the wind.  
Alex leads us over to the bed where Jack is lying. I flick a flame into life on my fingertips, gasping in surprise as I see the state that Jack is in. 

His skin is marred with bruises and cuts, slashed across his face and arms. But the worst of it is a long gash that runs from his shoulder, down across his chest, ending just below his ribcage. It looks painfully deep, dark blood bubbling up around the sides. I wince as Jack gives another shuddering breath, but he doesn’t open his eyes.  
“I tried,” Alex says, wringing his hands. Blood-soaked gauze and bandages lie across the bed. I can see the blood crusted under Alex’s fingernails as he wrings his hands together.  
“It’s going to be okay,” I tell Alex as Kellin approaches Jack, examining his wounds. “Kellin, can you—”  
He just nods, not looking back at me. Alex sends me a questioning glance but I shake my head. I don’t want to talk about it, not now at least. 

Kellin closes his eyes, resting his hands on Jack’s chest, carefully avoiding the gash. Alex and I stand there, watching as the cuts and bruises and Jack’s face and arms slowly fade, the skin healing over. The gash shrinks, slowly closing as Jack lets out a soft sigh. It’s a strange sight to watch—the purple and black fading away into his skin. I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding as Kellin finally opens his eyes. I catch sight of a small smile on his face before he collapses. 

I move forward, catching Kellin as he sinks to the floor. His head lolls against my shoulder as I maneuver him to the ground, so he’s resting in my lap. I press my fingers to the inside of his wrist, feeling a faint, but thankfully steady heartbeat. He’s unconscious now—healing Jack must have taken too much out of him. I wince, knowing he wouldn’t want me to touch him. But what else do I do? 

Alex sits on the edge of Jack’s bed, doing the same. “He’s gonna be okay,” I tell Alex. “Just let him sleep. He’ll be fine in the morning.”

Kellin’s surprisingly light as I lift him into my arms, bridal style. He doesn’t stir, his head resting against my shoulder, his breath warm against my neck.  
“I can help carry him,” Alex offers.  
“It’s fine,” I say. “Can you just open the doors?”

Alex nods as I carry Kellin into the dimly lit hallway. “Thank you,” he whispers as he shuts the door.

My footsteps echo through the hall as I carry Kellin. He stirs slightly, shifting in my arms, but he doesn’t wake. I tense as a guard comes around the corner, squinting into the glare of the flashlight. I expect to hear the guard shout, but there’s nothing, and the beam of the flashlight is lowered.  
“What happened?” Relief fills me as I hear Matty’s voice. “Oh my god.” He jogs over toward me.  
“Just help me get to our room,” I say.  
Somehow we manage to get to our room without seeing any other guards. I hear the click as Matty pulls back the lock, opening the door to our faintly lit room.  
“Do you need anything?” Matty asks as I lower Kellin onto the bed as gently as I can.  
I shake my head. “You’ve done enough,” I say. “You should go before they realize you’re gone.”  
He nods. “I’ll make sure no one else saw. Delete the microphone and camera footage, ya know.”  
“Thank you,” I call after him as the door shuts. Just before it does, I swear I see a black-haired guard standing in the hallway, the silver pin glowing on his lapel, but it locks before I’m certain.


	42. We’ll Turn To Ashes

Kellin is so cold. I’m afraid that he’s just going to stop breathing any minute now. His pulse is faint, his breaths shallow. I curl myself around him, trying to keep him as warm as I can. I will heat to rise to my skin, trying to summon the warmth but not the flames. I feel so helpless right now. I don’t know what to do or how to help him. 

He shifts a little against me, letting out a small noise as I hold him tighter. He’s shivering, yet he’s soaked in sweat, his dark hair clinging to his pale skin. Kellin hasn’t woken up, not since this morning when he opened his eyes briefly. Even then, I’m not certain if he was fully conscious then. He had been mumbling something to himself as he stared straight ahead, not registering when I spoke. 

“Please wake up,” I say again into the dark room as I brush his hair away from his face. If he doesn’t—no. I can’t lose him too. “Kellin, please.” Guilt pangs my stomach. It is my fault, isn’t it? Jack got hurt because of me, and because of that, Kellin got dragged into this whole mess, even though I tried so hard to keep him out of it. 

It’s almost noon. I haven’t gotten a wink of sleep, but I couldn’t care less. All I want is for Kellin to wake up. 

“Kellin, please wake up,” I whisper. “I love you. Please wake up for me.” The words slip out before I can stop them, but they’re true, aren’t they? I would do anything for him, just to know that he’s alive and safe. “Kellin, please wake up. I don’t know what I will do if you don’t. Please, please wake up.” It hurts me even more to know that if he were awake, he wouldn’t want me to be here. But I can’t leave him alone, not right now. Not when he’s unconscious and unresponsive. 

I hear a knock at the door and glance over as the door opens, hoping it to be Alex or Jack. But it’s just Rian, poking his head in. 

“Holy—” he catches himself as he stares at the two of us. “What happened?” he mouths at me.  
“Matty didn’t tell you?” I mouth back at him.  
He shakes his head. “I haven’t seen him all day.”  
I frown. That’s strange. I saw him last night. Worry pricks my mind, but I push it away. He’s probably fine.   
Rian clears his throat awkwardly. “M-49 is needed in Study,” he says, but his eyes wander over to where Kellin is lying.   
“He’s sick,” I say. “I don’t think he can go today.”  
Rian nods, his eyes filled with worry. “I’ll see what I can do,” he mouths to me as his radio crackles. Rian picks it up, listening for a few moments. I catch a few words before Rian puts it back down.   
“He has the day off,” Rian says. I breathe a sigh of relief. Thank god. “But Vi-” he catches himself. “M-37, you’re needed there instead.”   
I give him a short nod, leaning over to check on Kellin before I follow Rian out the door. If Kellin doesn’t wake up—no, I can’t think about that. 

\---

Kellin’s more awake when I get back from Study. I immediately go to his side, checking his pulse. His skin is still ice-cold against my fingertips. 

“Kellin,” I call out softly. “Kellin, can you hear me?”   
Kellin’s eyes fly open and he struggles against to get away from me for a few moments before relaxing when he realizes that it’s me.   
“Hey,” I brush his hair away from his face. “How are you feeling?”  
“Everything hurts,” he coughs, trying to sit up. I push him back down onto the bed.   
“Don’t,” I say. “You’ve been unconscious for over a day.”  
“That long?” He stares at me.  
I nod. “I’m so sorry,” I say. “I shouldn’t have asked you to help. Gods, I was so worried.”  
He shakes his head. “It’s okay,” he rasps.   
“Okay?” Anger pulses through my veins. “Kellin, you nearly died.”  
He gives a small shrug, pulling his hand from my grasp as he seems to remember something. “Like you care,” he mutters.   
I just stare at him. “Of course I care,” I say incredulously. “What would make you believe that I didn’t?”  
Kellin looks at me, and his expression is heartbreaking. He doesn’t have to say anything—I know what he’s thinking about. The escape plan. And what I didn’t tell him.  
“Kellin, I’m sorry about—”   
“Just stay away from me,” he whispers, so I do.


	43. I Hate Myself For The Things That I’ve Done

Kellin’s not talking to me—that’s understandable. I almost got him killed. I almost got Jack killed too. How could I have been so stupid? 

The awkwardness hangs heavily in the air between us. He avoids my gaze, keeping his eyes trained on the floor as we wait for the guards to take us to Study. 

It only grows worse as the minutes turn into hours as the day drags on. I pace back and forth by my bed, my eyes fixed on the door. Any minute now, it should be opening, right? It’s not like them to be this late. Unless something bad has happened. 

I can feel Kellin’s eyes burning into my back as I pace, but when I turn to look at him, he drops his gaze, immediately becoming fixated with the ground. I desperately want to talk to him, but I don’t, knowing I’ll be rejected. My heart is pounding though, my chest tightening. I’m forced to sit down before I fall, putting my head in my hands. Breathe, I tell myself. Just breathe. 

The door opens without warning. I look up, seeing Kellin do the same from out of the corner of my eye. I expect it to be Rian or Matty, but it’s not. It’s some guard I don’t recognize.  
“Come with me,” he says, gesturing to both Kellin and me. I glance over at Kellin, meeting his gaze before he looks down, remembering that he’s ignoring me. He brushes past me, following the guard out. I sigh, trying to push away the growing pit in my stomach, following the two of them. 

We head toward the Study rooms, like I expect us too. I’m surprised to see the number of guards standing in the hallway. It seems as if the entire force is packed into the hallway and the second Study room. The guard pushes us through the crowd. I catch sight of Jack and Alex heading down the hallway toward us. 

Jack raises his eyebrow, mouthing, “What’s going on?” to me. I shrug as the guard pushes me forward to the entrance of the room. I stumble as I’m shoved into Kellin.  
“Sorry,” I mutter, but he doesn’t react, standing stiffly in the entrance of the door. He turns to look at me, his face pale.  
“Keep moving,” the guard barks from behind us. Kellin doesn’t seem to be able to move, so I gingerly reach out, taking his wrist, pulling him forward with me. I get about two steps into the room before I freeze as well, horrified by the grotesque sight before me. 

I almost don’t recognize the body tied to the stake. The body is horrifyingly disfigured, the face mutilated and mangled. Dark blood is pooled on the floor beneath, dripping off the soaked guard uniform. The stench of rotting flesh and the metallic tang of iron is so strong I almost throw up right then and there. Kellin makes a small noise in his throat, stepping backward into me, his eyes squeezing shut as if he’s hoping he’ll wake up from a nightmare.

The worst part? I’m almost able to pass it off. Maybe it was a guard caught deserting. Or an intruder. I’m almost able to pretend that I don’t know who it was. Except for the familiar head of red hair. 

The world seems to drop from under me. I don’t register moving, even as I’m shoved roughly, moved over to the back wall. Kellin sends me a glance but I hardly comprehend it through the blood pounding in my head. How did this happen? My whole body feels numb. I can’t seem to move, with the ice forming in my veins, freezing me to the ground. I can’t do anything, can’t even take my eyes off the body. Maybe it’s some sort of morbid curiosity or fear. Does this mean that we’ve been caught? Does Mr. Styles know? The knowledge that even if Jack, Alex, and I are caught, that Kellin will be safe sends a bit of relief through my churning thoughts. 

I look up, meeting Jack’s horrified glance from across the room. Alex looks like he’s about to be sick, and I don’t blame him. It’s like all the air in the room has vanished. I try to inhale, but the world is closing in around me. He’s dead. It’s all my fault. 

The arrival of Mr. Styles startles me from my thoughts. I look up to see him standing beside the body. A silence falls over the room as he begins to speak.  
“Guard Mullins is dead,” Mr. Styles says. “Last night, he was caught by Officer Radke, trying to plot an escape for our subjects.” So Matty lied. He lied to protect us. The knowledge makes my stomach twist and I stumble backward. I don’t even register Kellin’s hand sliding into mine through the haze in my mind.  
I look up to see a commotion on the other side of the room.“You asshole!” Jack screams, lunging for his half-brother. He’s tugged back by the guards, but he doesn’t stop fighting, twisting desperately to get away from them. “You’re a murderer!” Alex reaches over, pulling Jack back. I can’t catch what he says, but he whispers something into Jack’s ear. Whatever he says, seems to calm Jack down because he sinks to the floor, resting his head in his hands.  
My gaze travels over to Craig, standing a few paces away, watching the scene. I can’t quite discern the emotion on his face. Is it pity? Maybe smugness? Anger? Disgust? It’s hard to tell.  
“We have no evidence that any of you would try to escape,” Mr. Styles’ gaze narrows on me. “But if you do, any attempts to escape will be severely punished. Some of you know what happens to those of you who try to escape.” I raise my head, meeting Mr. Styles’ stare with a firm one of my own. Finally, he looks away.  
“You all are dismissed. Duties will be cleared for today, except for Team Y. Go now.”

I’m still frozen in place as the guard starts to herd us out. Kellin tugs on my hand, dragging me back to the room. Jack lifts his head, giving me a little nod before I’m taken out of sight. 

As soon as we’re shut in our room, Kellin seems to come to his senses, dropping my hand and stepping away from me. I try not to feel hurt by it, pushing my thoughts away as I sit on my bed, waiting for Jack to come. 

At last he does. After Kellin is snoring softly in his bunk, the door creaks open slightly. I’m awake in an instant, jumping off my bed. Jack grabs my hand, tugging me into a storage closet. We’re careful that we’re not seen, after what happened last time. 

I lean back against the wall, shrouded by the darkness. “Matty’s dead,” I say, my voice sounding haunting, even to my ears.  
Jack bites his lip, looking at the ground. “I can’t believe it,” he whispers. “Maybe you were right. There isn’t a way to escape after all.”  
“We’re still gonna keep trying,” I say fiercely. “We’re not gonna stop until we’re free, okay?”  
“But is there a way?” Jack asks. “You said it yourself. We’re never getting out.”  
“We have to,” I say. “For Matty and for ourselves. We’re not going to let them win.”

\---

“Rian,” I hiss. I see Rian look up, scanning the hallway until he sees me. He jogs toward me, sliding into the closet in front of me. He looks terrible, his eyes swollen and puffy as if he had just been crying.  
“I’m so sorry,” I say.  
“He’s dead,” Rian mutters. “He’s dead because of you.” The words hurt, but they’re true.  
“I’m sorry,” I say again. “Rian, I—I’m so sorry.”  
“How did Radke find out?” Rian asks. The anger is taken out of Rian. He slumps over against the wall, his face in his hands.  
“I think he saw Matty helping Kellin and me,” I say.  
“He should’ve been more careful,” Rian mutters. “Vic, I’m sorry for taking it out on you.”  
“It’s okay, I get it,” I try to soothe him. “I’m really sorry.”  
“Vic, I’m sorry, but I don’t think I can do this anymore,” Rian says. “After seeing Matty die, I can’t.” He must see the alarm on my face because he continues quickly. “I’m not going to turn you in. I won’t tell them anything. But I’m getting out of here. I wish I could be more help.”  
“You’ve done plenty,” I say. “I understand. Thank you.”  
“I wish I could help you or bring you with me,” Rian says.  
I shake my head. “I’m not leaving until everyone else is out.”  
“That’s very brave,” Rian says. “Wish I could be that brave.”  
“You are brave,” I reassure him. “You and Matty. You both were willing to risk everything to save us.”  
“He was the only friend I had here,” Rian says.  
“He was a great person,” I say. “He was willing to do anything to help us escape.”  
Rian lets out a soft laugh. “He died a hero.”  
“We won’t forget him,” I say.  
Rian hesitates, then pulls a flask out of his pocket. Unscrewing the top, he raises it. “To Matty,” he says, passing it to me. “A friend and a hero.”  
I hesitate, then raise it to my lips. The liquid is lukewarm and bitter, but I drink anyways. It warms me as it goes down, my body relaxing as it does so. “To Matty,” I say as I hand it back to him.  
“Goodbye Vic,” Rian tells me. “Tell the others I said so okay? And good luck. I’ll see you again. Hopefully outside.”  
“Goodbye, Rian,” I say. “And I hope so.”

Rian’s gone by morning. His usual position is filled by a guard I don’t recognize. There’s no stir, no message from Mr. Styles, no body to be put on display, so I hope he left okay. 

The thoughts plague me throughout the day. It’s all my fault. Matty would still be alive if I hadn’t come up with the plan to involve the guards. How many people are going to die because of me? First Matty, then Jaime. What if Alex and Jack die because of me? What if Kellin does? 

As I’m standing in Study, the decision comes to me. I need to talk to Kellin. I need to finally tell him the truth about everything, before it’s too late.


	44. Can You Hear Me Now?

I grab his arm as we enter the showers, yanking him with me toward the first stall, turning on the water. Cold water splashes over both of us, soaking us through.  
“Let go of me.” He tries to tug his arm away, but I grip him tighter. “Vic, please.” I let him go as soon as I pull the curtain shut, turning to face him, blocking the entrance so he can’t leave.  
“I really need to talk to you,” I say.  
“I don’t want to talk to you,” he spits.  
“I didn’t want to drag you into all of this,” I plead.  
“I almost died,” he says. Guilt digs into my stomach. It’s true—he almost did.  
“I’m sorry,” I say. “I’m so sorry for keeping everything from you. Kellin, please. Just hear me out, okay?” 

Kellin holds my gaze for a minute before dropping it. “You didn’t tell me you were planning an escape?” he asks. I wince at the hurt in his voice. “Did you just not want me to come? Were you just gonna—”  
“We weren’t going to leave you behind,” I say quickly. I guiltily remember how he said he hates being alone.  
“Then why didn’t you tell me?” he asks. “You’ve been meeting with Jack and Alex for a while. Why didn’t you tell me?”  
I sigh. “It’s complicated.”

He just looks at me for a few moments before pushing away from the wall. “I’m gonna go,” he mutters.  
“No,” I grab his arm, forcing him to look at me. “Kells, I just didn’t want you to get your hopes up. I wanted to make sure you were safe, even if Jack, Alex, and I were caught. It’s just that—I know what could happen. There’s a lot I haven’t told you about my past.”  
He looks confused. “What do you mean?” he asks.  
“Because I tried once and it didn’t end well.”

Kellin’s eyes go wide, and he seems to put two and two together. “Your roommate,” he breathes.  
I nod, biting my lip. Tears spring into my eyes, but they’re hidden under the spray of the water.  
“I’m sorry,” he says.  
“It’s okay,” I take a deep breath. “It was six months ago.”  
“You don’t have to tell me,” Kellin says.  
“No. You deserve to know. So that you know what we’re getting into if you want to try to escape with us. I’ve kept too much from you.” I take a deep breath, wiping the water out of my face before continuing. “It started when they tried to make me kill someone.” Kellin’s eyes go wide, and I hurry on. “I refused, and they got mad. Like the maddest I’ve ever seen them. I don’t exactly remember what happened, but I was stabbed.”  
“Holy shit,” Kellin whispers. His hand slides into mine, squeezing my hand gently.  
“I almost died. Jaime, he is—was my old roommate—tried to heal me the best that he could, but obviously, I was going to die. So we decided to make a break for it. He had been there for a year, and he had been preparing for an escape, even before I came. We tried to run. Jaime knocked out the cameras—he had electricity powers, and we were going as fast as we could.” My voice breaks, and Kellin squeezes my hand again. “I was slowing us down. And we got caught.” Pain floods me as I remember that night, tears rolling down my cheeks. “He—he told them I had nothing to do with it, and he had been taking me as a hostage. He saved my life.” 

Kellin doesn’t say a word, and for a moment, I fear he’s horrified by me. Then he moves, wrapping his arms around my neck. He doesn’t say anything, but his presence alone comforts me. I put my arms around his shoulders gingerly, waiting for him to move back. When he doesn’t, I pull him closer, letting his head rest against my shoulder. I can feel his heart beating, light and fast against my chest as I trail my fingers up and down his back as I calm down. Kellin is shivering slightly—probably from the frigid water, but he doesn’t complain, leaning in closer to me.  
“I know I shouldn’t have,” I whisper. “I just—I don’t think I could see another person dying because of me. Especially not you. I needed to keep you safe. I’m sorry.”  
“It’s okay,” Kellin says. “I forgive you.”  
“Thank you,” I whisper, but I’m not sure he hears me.

“So, whatcha doing in there?” Jack’s voice calls out. Kellin and I jump away from each other in surprise, my shoulder hitting against the wall of the shower stall. Jack shimmers into appearance in the doorway, leaning against the door frame. He raises an eyebrow at me, prompting me to answer.  
“Talking,” I say, exasperated. “Go away.”  
“Ooo, okay,” Jack says. He makes a kissy face at me. I know Kellin can’t see him, but my face still goes red.  
“You’re annoying, did you know that?” I sigh.  
“Well, I came to tell you,” Jack says. “That I disabled the microphones in your room.”  
“What?” I gasp. “How?”  
“Wasn’t that hard,” Jack says. “We just snuck in and turned them off. Broke a few things and all. Hopefully, they won’t notice.”  
“Hopefully?” I groan. “You mean they will find out in two hours?”  
“Do you have that little trust in us?” Jack asks, pretending to be offended. “We were sneaky. I promise.”  
“Well, thanks,” I say. “Really. You didn’t have to.” After so long, it’s a strange feeling to know that we’re not being listened to every second of the day.  
“Wouldn’t want them listening on the stuff you two are doing,” Jack smirks at me as I glare at him.  
“Shut up,” I try to push him away but he ducks, sliding just out of reach.  
“Hey! I did you a favor,” Jack exclaims. “How am I still annoying?”  
“I don’t think you can stop being annoying,” I say. “Though I wish you could.”  
“So Rian’s gone?” Jack asks, ignoring my comment completely. I slipped them a note last night after I talked to Rian.  
I nod. “He left.” Kellin looks confused so I elaborate. “Rian was a guard here. He helped us develop the plan.”  
“That’s good,” Jack says. “At least he got out okay. They would’ve said something if he ran, right?”  
“That’s what I thought,” I say. “He must’ve convinced Mr. Styles to let him go.”  
“Wish it were that easy for us,” Kellin says.  
“We haven’t formally met, have we?” Jack asks. “Hi Kellin. I’m Jack. Thanks, by the way. You saved my life.”  
“No problem,” Kellin responds. “Anyone would have.”  
“You can thank us by getting out of our faces,” I say. The timer clicks behind us, the water spluttering. Any moment, the spray will shut off. 

Of course, Jack ignores me, choosing instead to slide into the already cramped stall and leaning against the wall next to me.  
“Meet us tonight,” he whispers. “I think I might have found a way.”


	45. Do You Wanna Know How The Story Ends?

“Do you want me to come?” Kellin asks as we’re toweling ourselves off. He’s still shivering slightly from the cold shower as he   
“No,” I shake my head. “You should get some sleep. We’ll probably be back late.”  
He looks like he wants to argue, but the door opens as the guard comes in. We walk in silence back to our room, but I can’t help but sneak glances at him. 

The door slams shut, the lock clicking in place. I sigh, turning to say something to Kellin, but I don’t get a chance to cause he kisses me before I have a chance to speak. I freeze at his touch, shocked. It’s over just as soon as it begins, leaving me in stunned silence. 

Kellin’s face is red as he steps away. I can only stare at him. Part of me screams, I told you so at me, the other part of me tells me to shut up because Kellin just actually kissed me.   
“Sorry,” he mumbles.   
“Don’t be,” I gasp, my heart still pounding in my chest.   
“I really like you, Vic,” he mutters, embarrassed.   
“I really like you too, Kells,” I say, making him blush even more.   
“Ever since you kissed me the first time,” he admits. “I just wanted you to—.” 

I kiss him before he has a chance to finish. This time, the kiss is softer, sweeter as we explore each other. His lips are soft against mine as he tangles his hands in my hair. I pull him closer to me, wrapping my arms around his waist, not wanting to break away, not wanting to stop the bubbly feeling rising in me as if I could float away and fly right now. We finally break apart, panting slightly. 

“Wow,” Kellin breathes.   
“You have no clue how long I’ve wanted to do that,” I say.

“Do you want to be my boyfriend?” Kellin asks. He drops his gaze immediately, his face going red. “Or, uh, whatever. I mean—”  
“I’d love to,” I say, kissing him again. He immediately wraps his arms around my shoulders, pulling me closer.

The door creaks open way too soon. Jack shimmers into appearance, raising his eyebrows at us.   
“Am I interrupting something?” He asks, motioning to how close we’re standing.  
“No,” I say, as Kellin flushes bright red. “Let’s go.” I squeeze Kellin’s hand once before I push past Jack, not wanting to see his expression. 

Jack just lets out a low whistle as we walk through the dark hallways. Sneaking out isn’t going to be the same without Rian helping us, but we manage okay. Jack grins at me as he picks the lock to Mr. Styles’ office, opening the door.   
“Shut up,” I mumble.   
“I told you, didn’t I?” Jack says as the door opens and he walks in, greeting Alex.   
“Told me what?” I ask, crossing my arms.  
“What happened?” Alex asks at the same time.  
“That he loooooves you,” Jack says, drawing out the word unnecessarily.   
“Let me guess,” Alex says. “You proclaimed your love for Kellin?”  
“Why am I friends with you?” I ask, my face going red. Alex just smiles as he floats up. It takes a few tries, but he cracks open the window, blasting us with freezing air.  
Jack just grins. “Cause we’re awesome and you need us.” I move to argue back, but Alex floats down, grabbing my hand, dragging me out into the cold night air.


	46. The Future Is Bulletproof

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can probably guess who *finally* shows up.

I shiver, wrapping my arms around me. It’s hard for me to get cold—that’s one upside about having fire powers. But I’ve been standing knee-deep in snow for the last half an hour. 

It’s the longest time I’ve been outside in what feels like forever, and I have to admit how much I’ve missed feeling the fresh air against my face. Even though it’s miserable out—snowy and windy, I have to admit how beautiful it is. From where I’m standing at the edge of the forest, I can see the snow falling in the floodlights. I look up, catching a few snowflakes on my tongue as I stare at the pine tree branches stretching overhead like a thick canopy. 

“H-having f-fun?” Alex appears next to me, his teeth chattering. He lets go of Jack’s hand as he stomps through the snow toward me.  
“Your lips are blue,” I say, even though it’s quite apparent.  
“W-well it-t’s f-freezing,” Alex points out unnecessarily. “A-and t-this idiot over h-h-ere t-though i-t was a g-good idea t-to meet in the m-middle of a snow st-torm.”  
I roll my eyes, grabbing Alex and Jack. “Come here before I have to drag your frozen asses back inside.” I hold out my hands, letting fire wreath over them. Heat radiates from around me, causing the snow to melt around us, soaking through our sneakers.  
“We should have stayed inside,” Jack complains.   
“You were the one who chose to meet today,” Alex points out.  
“How was I supposed to know it was gonna snow?”  
“It’s winter.”  
“So?”  
“I thought you were soooo amazing,” Alex says. “Now what?”  
“I am amazing,” Jack shoots back. “I’m literally the best. I just can’t predict the weather.”  
“Stop bickering. You sound like two-year-olds,” I complain.

“I agree,” a voice says from the forest behind us. We spin around, seeing a man appear from the darkness. His face is shielded by a hood, and he’s wearing a winter jacket. I realize how laughable we must look—three teenage boys standing in a melted circle of snow, wearing nothing but blue sweatpants and t-shirts, a fire roaring in the middle. I move to extinguish the fire, but the man just chuckles.   
“Don’t be afraid,” he says.   
“I’m not,” I say.

Alex looks at me, a confused expression on his face. “Vic, what?”  
Jack just laughs. “Way to show off,” he says.   
“Couldn’t help it,” the man says. I realize his voice sounds different now—less echoey and softer. He nears our circle, pushing off his hood to reveal a head of bright red hair. He looks familiar—but I’m not sure how. Now that I get a better look at him, he’s not that much older than we are, maybe around twenty one or two. “Good to see you, Jack. Nice to meet you, Vic and Alex.”  
“How did you know—” Alex starts, but Jack elbows him.  
“He can read minds,” Jack explains. “Everyone, meet Gerard Way. He’s one of us.”


	47. Got To See What Tomorrow Brings

M-07. That was Gerard’s number, when he was in the Facility. His hair is different—it’s bright red instead of black. I can’t quite believe that he was locked up there. From the way he stands, the confident way he holds himself, it’s hard for me to believe that he was bent and broken by the same place the three of us are trapped by. 

“I ran into Gerard last night when I was sneaking around out here,” Jack explains. “It was right before—the whole thing with—Matty.” He shifts uncomfortably, the memory still weighing heavily on all of us. “He saw me use my powers and knew instantly. He wanted me to sneak away and join him, but I explained that I needed to get all of you out too.”  
“So I offered to meet with you guys so we could discuss how to pull this off,” Gerard says. “I was at the Facility too, two years ago.”  
“How did you escape?” Alex asks. The four of us are sitting cross-legged in a circle on a melted patch of snow. “There were two of you, right?”  
Gerard nods. “Me and my boyfriend, Frank,” he says. “He got assigned to my room and we started planning an escape as soon as things got bad. I can read minds, as you know. He can create force fields. So it wasn’t that difficult to get out of our room. They noticed we were gone after a few seconds and came after us, but using our powers, we managed to get away.”  
“Can you help us escape?” Alex asks.  
Gerard nods slowly. “Yes,” he says. “But it’s going to be dangerous,” he warns. “If they see you trying to escape, they won’t hesitate to shoot.”  
“We know,” I say.   
“Why are you telling us this?” Alex asks.   
“Because,” Gerard says, looking directly at us. “If you stay, you’re forced to do what they tell you to, but you won’t die. You have the security of knowing you’ll be alive. If you leave, they’ll do all they can to kill you. And it won’t stop them from trying to hunt you down. Frank and I have been running ever since we got out.”  
“Living a life trapped isn’t living at all,” Alex says firmly. “I’d rather die trying to escape than be trapped forever.”  
“Anyway, who knows what happens when they’re tired of us?” Jack points out. “It’s not like they are going to let us go. They are probably just going to kill us.”  
I nod. “That’s true. After seeing what it’s like to be free after so long, I don’t think any of us can go back and live like we did before.”

“So you’re willing?” Gerard asks. “If we go through with this, I need everyone to be completely on board with the plan. It’s all or nothing. We get one shot at this. No redos.”  
“I’m in,” Alex says immediately. Jack and I follow, echoing his words.   
“We all are,” I say. “We are all ready to be free.”  
“Don’t let them catch any hint that you are planning an escape,” Gerard warns. “If they do, then we all are going to be in trouble. A lot. We probably won’t make it out alive if they do catch on.”  
“Got it.” I suddenly feel cold. What am I doing? Memories of the last time flash through my mind. What if it all goes wrong? I push away the nagging doubt. I’m doing this for Kellin. For Alex and Jack. We all deserve to live. We have been trapped inside the Facility for far too long. We are going to be free and that’s final.   
“It’s going to be more difficult,” Gerard says. “It was easy for Frank and I, since Frank could shield us from the bullets, but there are four of you?”  
“Five,” Alex corrects. When Jack and I look at him in surprise, he raises his eyebrows. “Craig?” Oh right. I had forgotten. It’s evident Jack did too, from the way he screws up his face. “He deserves to be free just as much as we do,” Alex points out. “No matter how much of an asshole he is.”  
“That’s fair,” Jack admits. “So, why would it be more difficult?”  
“Because there are more of you,” Gerard responds simply. “They’ll be more prepared after last time. And Frank’s good but he can’t protect that many people. It’s probably impossible to shield that many at one time.”  
“You can’t just mind control the guards?” Alex asks.   
“It doesn’t exactly work like that,” Gerard sighs. “More like I can see what you’re thinking and talk to you in your mind. I can’t control you. It’d be nice, though.”  
“It would make things easier,” Alex agrees. “Can’t win ‘em all I guess, though.”   
“So how do we do this?” I ask. “Do you have any ideas on how to escape?”  
“We’re not going to just get you out,” Gerard says. “We are gonna do it right. By destroying the facility once and for all.”


	48. We’ll Never Surrender

“Destroy the facility?” I echo.   
Gerard nods. “We need to fight back for once. Not just run. We need to show them that we are strong. A force to be reckoned with. Otherwise, they’ll never leave us alone.”  
Alex leans forward. “I like the sound of this,” he says.   
“Of course you do,” Jack mutters.  
“Frank and I have been planning this ever since we escaped,” Gerard says. “We obviously haven’t had much luck, but we did manage to rescue one of us before he was sent to the Facility.”  
“How many of you are there?” I ask.   
“Three of us,” Gerard replies. “We didn’t think we would have much luck, but if the three of you also are in on the plan, I do think that we might have a chance.”  
“So, what’s the plan?” I ask.  
“What powers do you all have?” Gerard asks. “Alex, you are telekinetic, right?”  
“Yep,” Alex says. “Jack can turn invisible. Vic can make things catch on fire.”  
I wrinkle my nose at him. “That’s a weird description,” I say. “It makes me sound like I play with matches or something.”  
“You have matches in your hands. That’s how it works,” Alex says without missing a beat. “Anyway, Kellin has healing and Craig has power manipulations.”  
“Basically he can steal our powers,” Jack mutters. “Useless.”  
Alex elbows him. “He can kinda copy them,” Alex elaborates. “Not just stealing them. But he can only do one at a time, from what I’ve seen.”  
“Limitations suck,” Jack groans. “I wish I could just turn the whole population invisible.”  
“Seven billion people?” Alex laughs. “I think you’re aiming a bit high, Jacky.”  
“Anyway,” I cut in before they can drag on the tangent even further. “You said there are three of you? You, Frank, and who is the last person?”  
“Oli. He’s water. Well, water and ice,” Gerard says. “He’s kinda new though. We rescued him around two weeks ago. Frank’s training him right now, trying to get him good at his powers. By the time the escape rolls around, he’s gonna be a pro.”  
“So do I just unlock all the doors and we charge out?” Alex asks. “You and Frank go from the outside, we attack from the inside.”  
“That wouldn’t end well,” I grimace. “I can just picture that.”  
“Jack, what if you cause a diversion and trigger the alarm system? Keep yourself and Alex invisible while they checked your room. They’d send a lot of the guard force there. Then Frank and I will be able to sneak in,” Gerard says. “You just have to keep them up on the top floor, away from the Dark Room.”  
“The Dark Room?” I ask. “Why that?”  
“They would never leave the front door unguarded,” Alex points out. “Not for escaped subjects. I guess Frank would be able to get you past the snipers on the roof, right?”  
Gerard looks confused for a moment. “We wouldn’t get in through the front door,” he says.   
Alex shakes his head. “They’d see you coming out of Mr. Styles’ office from the front door,” he points out. “If Jack wasn’t there to keep you invisible.”  
Gerard’s face clears. “Oh,” he laughs. “There’s a backdoor, hidden under the padding in the Dark Room.”   
“Really?” Jack exclaims. “You mean all that time sneaking out the window was for nothing?”  
Gerard laughs again. “Yeah. We found the blueprints to the building a while back a bit after we escaped. Thought they might come in handy. But yes, there’s a backdoor. They always keep it locked and bolted. An alarm is rigged to go off as soon as it’s opened, but if Jack’s already set off the alarm, it should be no problem. ”  
“Do you need me to melt through the locks?” I ask.   
Gerard shakes his head. “We can do it,” he says. “Well, Oli can. He’s pretty good at that.”  
“After that, we’ll get into the control room. You all need to hold the guards off and try to get through to the front door. I’ll be listening in on the guards’ thoughts. If they are alert or if anything needs to be changed, I’ll tell you.”  
“Sounds like a plan,” I say.  
“I’ll meet you here tomorrow night?” Gerard says. “We need to make sure the plan is foolproof. Remember, we only get one shot.”  
“We’ll try,” Alex replies. “And yes. We’ll take all the time we need.”  
He nods at us. “Good night and good luck,” he calls as he disappears into the darkness.

I stand alone in the darkness as Jack and Alex disappear. The cold doesn’t bother me as much anymore as I stand, staring at the Facility from the edge of the field. Snow is falling more thickly, obscuring most of the concrete building from view, but I can still see the floodlights shining, aimed at the perimeter of the field, the glow stopping short from where I’m standing. Pine trees stretch overhead, the dark cover of clouds blocking the stars from view. But it’s still beautiful. We’re going to do this. We have finally have a way out.

“Ready?” Jack asks, startling me as he appears beside me. I nod, taking his hand, feeling the familiar sensation creeping through my skin as we disappear from view.

Now that I’ve tasted freedom, I know there’s nothing that will stop me from reaching it.


	49. I’ll Fight For You Till Then

As soon as I get into my room, I head toward Kellin’s bed. I’m not certain if he’s asleep or not, but I lie down next to him, putting my arms around him. He shifts against me at my touch. I can feel the gentle rise and fall of his chest. I see his eyes open in the darkness as I kiss him softly. Wow, I could really get used to kissing him every day. 

“I missed you,” he whispers as I finally pull away.   
“It’s only been a few hours,” I can’t help but smile at him.   
“How did it go?” He asks, his breath warm against my neck.   
“Fine.” I wrap my arms tighter around him. “We came back in one piece.”  
Kellin sighs, resting his head against my shoulder. “You’re cold,” he mumbles.   
“So are you.” I poke him.   
“No, but you’re usually so warm,” he says, tapping my chest. “You warm me up.” I roll my eyes and pull him closer, so he’s cradled against me. I kiss the side of his head, breathing in his familiarity.   
“You warm now?” I ask as I kiss his cheek.   
“Better.” He snuggles against me, his hand slipping into mine. He’s right—he is warmer now.   
“You’re so cute when you’re sleepy,” I murmur, kissing the soft skin on his neck. “Actually, scratch that. You’re so cute all the time.”   
“Don’t be annoying,” he mutters, but I can tell he’s blushing.   
“What? It’s true,” I say, kissing him again. 

He lets out a soft sigh as he curls up closer to me.   
“Kellin?” I say, breaking the silence.   
“Hmm?” He asks sleepily.   
“I don’t want to get your hopes up,” I say, tracing circles on his hip. “But we might have a chance to escape.”  
“Really?” He twists around, so he’s facing me, now wide awake.   
“We met someone,” I say. “Gerard. He escaped from here a long time ago. He’s gonna help us do it.”  
“That’s great,” Kellin breathes. “Do you think we have a chance?”  
I nod as I run my hand down his arm, pulling him closer to me. “I do. I really think we do.”  
“Thank you,” he says. “For everything.”  
“I’d do anything for you,” I tell him. “Anything.”

I’m still wide awake, even after he’s drifted off into sleep. I lie there, trailing my fingers up and down his spine, listening to the sound of his steady breathing. It’s the only sound I ever need to hear, the sound of him alive.   
“We’re getting out of here,” I whisper. “I promise you.”

This is how I want to fall asleep every night—with him next to me. I want to wake up to him every single day. I just want him. He’s all that I will ever need. 

\---

“How is it going?” Mr. Styles asks as I walk into Study. I frown, confused to see the room empty besides two folding chairs facing each other, Mr. Styles seated in one. “Take a seat,” he says, motioning to the chair across from him.   
I cross the room, sitting down in front of him, folding my hands in my lap. What is this all about?  
“You’ve been a great asset,” he says. He does sound sincere. “You’ve been with us for so long, yet you’ve always had outstanding results.” Thanks for the reminder, I think bitterly. I’ve been here way too long.  
“Did you need me here for a reason?” I ask stiffly. Unsurprisingly, making small talk with Mr. Styles is not high on my bucket list. I’d rather be back with Kellin, in our room.   
“I’m sorry about Guard Mullins,” he says. I look up, shocked. He can’t know, can he? If he does—No. He can’t. Otherwise, I’d be dead by now, right? “He—the two of you knew each other, is that correct?”   
Is he looking for information? Maybe is he trying to confirm his suspicions? “We talked once or twice,” I respond. “Obviously, we never knew much about each other, with the rules and all here.” I can’t help but let bitterness seep into my voice.   
Surprisingly, Mr. Styles flinches at my words. “I’m sorry you had to see that,” he apologizes. “But I needed to set an example. You know that, right?” I wonder if he’s talking about Jaime or not. Does he know about the escape plan?  
“I’m not certain why you would need to,” I respond. “I don’t think anyone here is trying to escape.”  
He meets my gaze, staring at me until I start to get uncomfortable. Is he testing me? Does he know I’m lying through my teeth? “Right,” he says finally. 

The silence stretches on as he watches me.   
“If there’s nothing else,” I say awkwardly. “Can I go back to my room?”  
“Oh, yes,” Mr. Styles blinks as if he’s snapping out of whatever daze he’s caught in. He motions to the guard standing outside the room. “Take him back.”  
“M-37,” Mr. Styles says hesitantly as I follow the guard out. I look back to see him standing, watching me. “I know you don’t believe me, but I do care about all of you.”  
“Thank you, sir,” I say. “It means a lot to me.” It really doesn’t. I can’t give less of a shit about his lies.   
He nods, breaking his stare. “Go now.”

Even as I follow the guard down the hallway, away from the Study room and down the stairs, I can feel his gaze still trained on me, as if he can see right through me.


	50. A Thousand Stars Burning In The Sky Up Overhead

We quickly settle into a routine. I keep my head down, following every instruction during Study. I’ve stopped meeting with Jack and Alex after lights out in fear we might get caught. We can’t let them know what we’re planning. Not when we are so close to our goal.

After dark, Jack sneaks me out, and the two of us go and meet with Gerard. Alex meets us to fly us in and out, but he stays inside, keeping watch in the office. Kellin wanted to come too, but it’s too dangerous. A month of finalizing plans and running through actions pass. I can see the weather changing slowly around us. The heavy snows become lighter and more frequent. Small green shoots poke their way up from the damp ground, fresh and green. Everything seems so new to me, so fresh. It brings a smile to my face as I see the tiny buds on the trees around us. Even the dirt feels amazing, the sun’s rays feel like a kiss against my skin. Spring is coming soon, the days becoming longer and the nights becoming shorter. The weather is warmer now—we don’t have to shorten our meetings in fear of getting frostbite. We aren’t going to rush this. We are getting out of here. 

I’d usually be tired, considering how little sleep I’ve been getting, but I’ve never felt more awake, every nerve in my body excited. Energy pulses through my veins. All I can do is think of the escape.

“If something goes wrong,” Gerard says. “We need to be prepared to run. Leave in any way you can, get away from the Facility and the guards. So we’ll get you out through either the window if Alex is near, or the backdoor. Use your powers in any way you can to protect yourselves.”  
I nod. I know how dangerous this could potentially be. The guards will do anything they can to stop us.  
“In case we get separated,” Gerard continues. “You need to know how to find us. Get out of the Facility and get into the trees. The house is about a mile out. There’s a path you can pick up a few hundred meters straight past the fence. Follow the left path across the stream and that’s where the house is.”  
“What if they follow us?” Jack asks. “Shouldn’t we meet up somewhere farther? Try to make them lose our trail?”  
“This isn’t our only safe house. There are others too,” Gerard explains. “We’ll regroup there, then head out to other ones.”  
“Should we split up?” I ask. “Might be safer. At least some of us will get away.”  
Gerard shakes his head. ‘We’re stronger together. All of us fighting together. That’s how we will beat them.” He must feel the doubt creeping in my mind because he nudges me. “Hey, that’s only assuming it goes wrong. If not, we are walking out of the front door, heads held high, the Facility burning behind us.”  
I can’t help but smile at him.  
“But remember, our goal is for you to escape and us to destroy the control room and documents,” Gerard says. “Try not to kill anyone. Sometimes, it’s inevitable. But the less we kill, the less justified they are to pursue us. I know most of them have treated you like shit. Most of them have hurt you in some way. Most of them think of us as nothing. But they are people too. If we kill them, they have a reason to chase us to the ends of the world. So as hard as it may be, keep that in mind.”  
“I think Alex is gonna have the worst time with that rule,” Jack mutters.  
“It’s important,” Gerard holds my gaze. “If we blow it, our chance of being completely free and safe might be gone too.”  
I nod. “I know,” I say. As tempting as it is to take it out on the guards, I have to remember. Matty and Rian flash through my mind. They were guards too. Just caught up on the wrong side of the fight and looking for a way out.  
“We should tell Craig,” I realize. “Just to let him know what’s going to happen. If he’s going to escape too, he needs to know.”  
Jack rolls his eyes at me. “Fine,” he mutters.  
“He deserves to be free as much as we do,” I point out.  
“I guarantee you he won’t want to come,” Jack says. “He’s happy here. They love him.”  
“We should at least give him a chance.”  
“I know,” Jack sighs. “He’s still an asshole though. Mr. Styles adores him and it got to his head.”  
“Oh, that reminds me,” I say, the strange conversation I had with Mr. Styles flashing through my mind. “Mr. Styles talked to me around a month ago. It completely slipped my mind. He never spoke about it again.”  
“What did he say?” Jack asks curiously.  
“He said something about how he cared about us and how he was sorry for—for Matty,” my voice wavers at the end. It still pangs me that another person died because of me. _All my fault_. I push the thoughts away, seeing Jack and Gerard frowning.  
“I call bullshit,” Jack says immediately. “You know the man. I don’t think he has a heart.”  
“That’s weird,” Gerard mutters.  
“I think he was trying to figure out if he—Matty was helping us develop an escape plan,” I say. “I hope I didn’t give anything away.”  
“Not like he actually cares about us,” Jack snorts. “He was just saying it to get an answer out of you.”  
“I wouldn’t be so certain about that,” Gerard says. Both Jack and I stare at him, so he continues. “He had a son, you know.”  
Jack shudders. “I can’t imagine that,” he says.  
“Had?” I ask. Matty and Rian mentioned he had a son, but I had assumed he was still alive.  
Gerard nods. “I don’t know the whole story,” he says. “But his son died and somehow he ended up at the Facility. It’s all connected somehow. I’m not quite sure how though.”  
“One mission at a time,” Jack groans. “We’ll deal with the weird family thing later. Let’s get the hell out of here first.”  
I can’t help but grin at him as he grabs my hand, pulling me toward the Facility.  
“We have to talk to Craig,” I remind him.  
“Yeah, yeah,” Jack says. “Let’s just get it over with.” He looks over at Gerard. “When you have the time, can you meet me here?”  
Gerard nods, smiling at us. “You got it. Next time we meet. You’ll be free.” 

I do hope it’s true.


	51. Catch Hold Of The Madness

Room four is located at the end of the top floor, a few doors down from Jack and Alex’s room. It’s practically just above the Dark Room. Other than the giant black four painted across the door, it looks identical to the other rooms. I take note of the locations of rooms one and two, located on the top floor as well. We don’t go in them, but I assume they look exactly the same as all the other rooms. 

Jack knocks three times on Craig’s door before he unlatches it. The door squeaks a bit as he yanks it open. Unsurprisingly, Craig’s room looks just like ours, though considerably better furnished. There’s a small crate of books near the door and a half-done puzzle lying on the floor. Craig himself is sitting on his bed, reading a book from the dim light of a lamp. He looks up as the door shuts, confusion, then annoyance flickering across his face. 

“How many times do I have to tell you?” he grumbles. “Leave me alone.” Jack lets go of my hand and the two of us shimmer into appearance.  
Craig looks at me in surprise. “Well, wasn’t expecting you,” he says. “If you’re here to get revenge, I’d think twice.” He holds up his hand, a flame flickering on his fingertips. The pressure tightens in my skull, my powers slipping away from my grasp. I struggle to keep my face neutral, even through the pain.   
“Stop being a dick,” Jack says. “We’re not here for that.”  
Craig looks me over, then relaxes his hand, the pressure vanishing from my skull. I breathe out a sigh of relief, feeling the flames flicker on my hands again. “Let’s start over, shall we?” I ask, extending a hand out to him. “I’m Vic.”  
“You already know who I am so I won’t bother explaining,” Craig says, ignoring my gesture completely. “So you’ve joined up with those two?”  
I shrug, dropping my hand. “What else was I supposed to do?”  
He lets out a short laugh. “Not much, I suppose. Though I didn’t expect for you to be as foolish as they are, seeing as you’ve seen firsthand what happens if we try to escape.”  
The words sting, but I push them away. There’s no time for doubt, not now. Not when we’re so close. “Can we trust you?”  
“No,” Jack mutters.  
“That depends,” Craig says. “On what secret you want me to keep.”  
“It’s gonna happen soon.”  
He shakes his head. “You guys are insane.”  
“Why?” Jack asks.   
“You’re never gonna make it out,” he says. “They’ll kill all of you. Just like they did to—what was his name again? M-26?”  
I force myself to breathe out slowly. I refuse to be baited by him. “His name was Jaime,” I say, as calmly and slowly as I can. “And no. Not this time. We’re prepared.”  
Craig looks me over, a strange expression flitting over his face. Maybe respect? “Well, count me out,” he says. “I’d rather not die on a suicide mission.”  
“You see why I hate him?” Jack mutters to me. “Selfish prick.”  
“Craig, we could really use your help,” I say. “You’re powerful. We’re gonna need all the help we can get if we are going to destroy this place.”  
“Why would I help you?” Craig asks “They’ve done nothing but help us here.”  
“Help us?” Jack splutters.   
“They give us food and water. A roof over our heads. What more could you ask for?”  
“We’re tortured and forced to use our powers.”  
“See, that’s the difference between you and me,” Craig says. “You resist. As if using our powers for them is bad. They praise us and teach us to be stronger. I’m appreciated here. What more could we ask?”  
“Freedom?” Jack asks. “Freedom to do as we please? A life as a normal teenager?”  
“But we’re not normal, are we?” Craig replies. “We have powers, powers that make us special.”  
“But we could do so much more outside of this place,” I say. “We could do so much more, all of us together and free to do as we please.”  
“You don’t understand! For the first time in my entire life, I have people here who care about me!” Craig shouts.

“You think they care about you?” Jack bursts out. “No, they don’t. They want you to be their good little circus animal. Have you turn tricks or play fetch. They don’t actually care about you.”  
Craig shakes his head. “You’re wrong, you know that?” his voice breaks. “They care about me. Mr. Styles cares about me.”  
“Do they?” I ask softly, elbowing Jack as he tries to respond. “Mr. Styles stabbed me once, you know. He got mad when I refused to kill someone, so he stabbed me.” Craig stares at me, not responding so I continue. “They shot Jaime without hesitation when he tried to escape. You told me it would be a suicide mission to escape, right? Well, I was going to die if we didn’t try—I needed medical help—my wound was infected. At least he tried.” I’m crying now, tears rolling down my face as I brush them away. “He tried to save my life and he was willing to die because of it.” 

Jack and Craig are both staring at me, Jack in sympathy, Craig in horror. Jack reaches over, wrapping his arm around my shoulder as I struggle to control my breathing.

“And I know we’re not much,” I say softly. “But I’m willing to bet that we can put aside our differences. All of us. We could be your new family, Craig. We understand and appreciate you, more than anyone else will, because all of us are just like you.”   
Craig just stares at me speechless as I tug Jack with me.   
“Think it over, okay?” I say. “We’ll tell you when it’s time. It’s your choice whether to come or not. We won’t make you; we’re not like they are.”


	52. I’ll Take You Down In Flames

“How’d it go?” Kellin asks as I slip into our room.  
“Not great,” I sigh, sitting down next to him. He shifts, swinging his legs over mine so his head rests against my shoulder. I rest my chin on his head, my fingers tangling in his dark hair.  
“Do you think he will escape with us?” Kellin asks.  
“I’m not sure,” I say. “He might. It’s hard to tell though. He sees this place as a kind of home, not a prison.”  
“Will he tell on us?”  
“I hope not,” I sigh. “I don’t think he will though.”  
“I wish we didn’t tell him,” Kellin says. “It would have been safer that way.”  
“But it wouldn’t have been fair to him,” I counter. “No matter how much of an asshole he is, we can’t just abandon him here.”  
Kellin makes a face. “I don’t like him,” he mutters. I know he’s referring to the time we first met Craig.  
“Me either,” I say. “But I can’t blame him either. He was just doing what he was told to.”

We sit in comfortable silence, neither of us feeling the need to talk. I absentmindedly run my hand through his hair as he leans against my chest. 

“Kellin, can you promise me something?” I ask, breaking the silence.  
“Yeah?” He looks up at me.  
“If things go wrong,” I hesitate.  
“No,” Kellin says immediately, pulling away from me. “No way.”  
“You didn’t let me—”  
“No,” he repeats. “I’m not leaving without you.”  
“Kells—”  
“No!” Kellin exclaims. “We’re in this together. We’re both leaving or neither of us is.”  
I sigh, knowing I’m never going to convince him otherwise. “I just need you to be safe,” I say softly. “I need to know that you will be alive and safe.”  
“I need to know that you’re alive,” Kellin counters. “How do you think I’ll be if you die?”  
I reach over, taking his hand. “Kellin, just promise me that—”  
“No,” Kellin says. “We’re leaving together and that’s final.” 

He kisses me before I can protest, tangling his hands in my hair. I try to push him away to continue talking for a few moments, but eventually give up, letting him win. He kisses me desperately, as if it were the last time he would be able to. I cup his face in my hand, pulling him closer to me, though I don’t think that’s physically possible. He shifts so he’s sitting in my lap as he pushes me over onto my back on my bed, pinning me down. 

I freeze for a moment, fear coursing through my body suddenly. Kellin instantly sits up, pulling away from me.  
“Sorry,” he mumbles.  
“No, it’s fine,” I say, my heart still racing. It’s just Kellin, I tell myself. It’s okay.  
“Did I do something wrong?” Kellin asks. “I can get up.” He moves to climb off of me but I pull him back down.  
“It’s okay,” I say. “With you, it’s okay.”  
He smiles at my words as I shift, sitting up so I’m at eye level with him.  
“What would I do without you?” I ask.  
He blushes at my words, looking away for a moment.  
“I love you,” I tell him, reaching to tilt his chin so he has to look at me. “I really do.”  
“I love you too,” he says. 

I kiss him softly, my hand sliding up his shirt. “Let’s get rid of this,” I mumble, slowly pulling the fabric up. He nods, moving my hand away so he can strip off his shirt. I pull mine off too, tossing it to the floor beside my bed before I kiss him again. He kisses me back hungrily as I pull him back down with me, kissing him over and over again. We’re both breathing heavily, our hearts racing, but I don’t think I’ve ever been happier. 

I wince as something digs into my back, something crinkling on the bed.  
“What the—” I mumble, breaking the kiss for a moment so I can reach under the blankets. My finger brushes against the edge of something as I pull out a crumpled up piece of paper.

“What is that?” Kellin asks.  
“I don’t know,” I say as I unfold it quickly, recognizing Jack’s messy scrawl. It’s just two words, but it’s enough to make my heart pound. _Three days. ___

____

“What does it say?” Kellin asks.  
I wordlessly hand him the note, my mind whirling too fast for me to speak. He reads the note, looking at me speechlessly. It’s really happening. We’re getting out of here. Three days. That’s all we have to get through before we’re free. 

____

\---

____

All of the next day, all I can think about is the escape. I can practically taste the freedom, though the worry keeps me grounded. What if everything goes wrong? I keep expecting to see Gerard and Frank hauled in or for Mr. Styles to inform us that we’ve been caught. 

____

“Are you okay?” Mr. Styles’ voice snaps me out of my daze. I look up at him confused.  
“Of course,” I respond. “Why wouldn’t I be?”  
“You have just seemed tired lately,” he says. “I was wondering if you were okay.” I frown, confused. Why does he keep pretending he’s concerned about me? The worry on his face does seem quite real though, but I’m pretty sure it’s all an act.  
“I guess I haven’t been sleeping well,” I say cautiously. He doesn’t have to know that it’s because I sneak out every night to meet with Gerard. “Nightmares and stuff.” I wince at my own lie. It seems feeble to my own ears.  
Mr. Styles seems to buy it. “What are they about?” he asks, his voice softening.  
I cringe, trying to keep a straight face. Even if I was having nightmares, Mr. Styles would be the last person on this planet I would want to talk to about them. Probably because he’s the cause of all of them. “The usual stuff,” I mutter.  
“What kind?” Annoyance spikes in me. Why is he keeping up this act? Ever since he killed Matty, he’s been acting strangely around me, as if I’m about to break into pieces.  
“Why do you care?” I ask. “Not like you ever have.”  
He frowns. “I do care about all of you,” he says. Not for the first time, a part of me wonders if he’s actually not lying, but I push it away. If he really cared, then why are we trapped in here? Why would he hurt us one moment then pretend to care in the next? For some reason, my conversation with Gerard flashes in my mind. _He had a son. It’s all connected somehow. I’m not quite sure how. _It just makes me even more angry.  
“I’m not your son,” I spit at him. “You don’t have to pretend to care.”  
Mr. Styles’ eyes flash and for a moment, I think he’s going to hit me, but he merely sighs. “You’re right,” he says. “I’m sorry for everything. But I never lied.” He leaves the room with another word, leaving me standing there, stunned.__

____


	53. I Don’t Wanna Leave Without You Buried By My Side

We have the day off from Study today. I’m not certain whether to be worried or grateful. At least we’ll be able to conserve our strength for the escape tomorrow. But they’ve never given us a day off before. That’s what worries me. 

The one good thing that comes from this is I get to spend the whole day with Kellin.  
“What do you think is going on?” Kellin asks from where he’s lying next to me.  
“I don’t know.” I prop myself up on one arm so I can look at him better. “This has never happened before.”  
“Do you think they have—” he stops.  
“I don’t think so,” I say. “Otherwise, they’d be more panicked.”  
He nods, but he still looks worried.   
“We’re gonna be fine,” I reach over, running my thumb along his hand.  
“I know,” he says. I lean over, kissing him lightly. Kellin smiles as I do so, wrapping his arms around my neck and pulling me onto him. I trail my lips down his neck, my hand sliding up his shirt, feeling his heart beating light and fast. 

“Oh, don’t mind me,” a voice says. “Make this R rated. I don’t mind.” I jolt up quickly, staring wide-eyed around the room  
“What the—Jack?” I call. Kellin turns red from where he’s lying under me.   
“Fancy meeting you here,” Jack says.  
“Fuck you,” I mutter. “Actually, no. Alex will do that for you.”  
“Ouch,” Jack laughs, appearing next to the bed. He’s watching us with an amused expression on his face. “Someone’s pissed.”  
“You’re in our fucking room,” I say as I climb off of Kellin, opting to sit on the floor instead. “How long have you been here?”  
“Long enough to see your make out session,” Jack says.  
Kellin blushes again, and I roll my eyes. “Did you need something?” I ask. “Or just get out, please.”  
“Wow, you really just want to keep making out with your boyfriend,” Jack laughs, ducking as I elbow him. “No, but seriously. We think they’ve caught wind of an escape.”  
“Rian wouldn’t have told them,” I say immediately.   
“I know. It had to be Craig,” Jack fumes. “Now they’ll have double the resources. I knew we shouldn’t have told him.”  
“We weren’t just gonna leave him here,” I argue.   
“Should we wait?” Kellin asks.   
“No. I’ll try to get out and tell Gerard and Frank. But if I can’t, they’ll be coming tomorrow so we have to be ready.”  
“I guess the only thing we can do is just hope it works out,” I shrug. “They don’t know for sure, right?”  
Jack shakes his head. “Alex is trying to figure out how much they know. I don’t think they know much, just that an escape is being planned. If they knew it was happening tomorrow, they’d be more freaked out.”  
“So, we’re continuing?” Kellin asks.  
Jack nods, chewing on his lip. He looks nervous, and I don’t blame him. I can only remember how badly it went the first time for me.   
“It’s gonna be fine,” I tell Jack. “We’re getting out of here tomorrow.”  
“I hope so,” Jack says. “We just have to be careful.”  
“Save your energy. We don’t know what will happen tomorrow,” I call to him as he leaves. “And be careful!”  
He nods. “You too, okay?”  
“We are getting out of here,” I say, more to comfort myself than him. “We have to.”

\---

There are two guards standing in front of Mr. Styles’ office. The sight of it sends chills down my spine as I’m hurried down the hall toward the showers. Does that mean they found out?

“M-37.” I flinch as I hear Mr. Styles’ voice from down the hall, our last conversation flashing in my mind. Kellin squeezes my hand once before he’s ushered away by the guard.   
Mr. Styles nears me and panic thrums through my mind. Every nerve in my body is screaming for me to run. It would be too suspicious if I sprint away now, wouldn’t it?  
“What do you need?” I ask, keeping my eyes trained on the floor.  
He seems as if he wants to say something, then thinks better of it. “Never mind. Continue with your day.”  
I hesitate, wondering if it will get me into more trouble if I say it. “I noticed the new guards,” I say, trying to keep my voice light. Jack’s warning flashes in my mind. They know about the plan. “I was wondering what that was for.”  
Mr. Styles narrows his eyes, but he doesn’t comment. “Possible security breach,” he says lightly. “Why? Are you concerned?”  
I force myself to remain calm. “Yes, I was worried that someone might try to escape.” I’m testing him now, seeing what his response is.  
Mr. Styles nods. “We heard possible rumors of an escape,” he says. “But nothing that you need to be concerned about.” Is that good or bad? I wonder exactly how much he knows.   
“That’s good,” I decide. “Who were the rumors about?”  
“No one you would know,” he brushes off my question. “You know we are just trying to keep you all safe.”  
“Thank you, sir,” I force a tone of sweetness into my voice. “It means a lot to me.” It really doesn’t. I couldn’t care less.


	54. We’re Too Far Gone To Turn Back Now

I don’t get much sleep. All I can think about is what might go wrong. Every noise during the night makes me tense. I don’t know if I’m expecting it to be Mr. Styles and the guards, coming in to tell us we’ve been caught or it to be Jack, telling us he’s met with Gerard and Frank and we’re waiting for a different day. 

But no matter how long I wait, no more messages come during the night. It worries me even more. What if Jack was caught? What if Gerard and Frank were? If that happened, then we really are screwed. 

I’m caught in a daze in the morning, half from lack of sleep, half from worry. I probably flunk everything in Study—but I don’t really care. 

As I’m led back, Jack catches my eye as we pass each other in the hallway. We don’t dare speak since the guards are right there, shepherding us to and fro. But he nods and gives me a little smile. 

I try to hide my grin as I follow the guards down the hallway away from Jack. We’re on for tonight. This is the last day I’ll spend here. 

For the rest of the day, I can barely concentrate. Everything looks different now. Our room suddenly seems so small, yet so large at the same time. Strangely, the familiar walls aren’t so empty anymore, the grays less foreboding. The hallways don’t seem as unfriendly anymore; the showers more welcoming now that I know that this is our last day here. Somehow, everything is more colorful. The almost year and a half I spent calling this place home is coming to an end. Freedom is so close. I can practically taste it.

So much as changed in the last three months. I found a will, a reason to escape. Meeting Kellin brought color into my life, a color that hadn’t been there for a long time. He gave me a way out, a way out of the gray and the darkness and into the vibrant colors. 

“You’re in a good mood,” Kellin remarks as I lie down next to him.  
“Well, I’m just happy,” I pull him close to me, entwining my fingers with his. He instinctively curls toward me, his skin cold against mine.   
“For once,” Kellin mutters.   
“What did you say?” I poke him gently.   
“Nothing,” he says.   
“Liar.” I kiss his forehead, making him smile.  
“You’re the one smiling like an idiot,” he says.  
“You’re lucky this idiot loves you,” I say. “Cause you’re smiling like one too.” I kiss his forehead again, lightly.   
“Am not,” he protests, but I roll over, trapping him beneath me.   
“Really?” I whisper as I trail my fingers down the side of his neck, hooking on the collar of his shirt. “Cause I think you are.” I press my lips to his skin, kissing slowly down his neck as he lets out a quiet sigh.   
“I’m not,” he complains, but he really is. His fingers trace along the hem of my shirt, sliding over my warm skin.   
I lean over, kissing him on the lips softly. I roll over, so I’m on top of him, pressing him down onto the bed. He shifts, wrapping his legs around mine, not breaking the kiss as he does so. He lets out a small moan as I kiss down his neck, the friction between us building. My fingers roam under his shirt against his bare skin as I tug his shirt off, tossing it behind me. I kiss down his chest, feeling him breathing heavily beneath me. Kellin slides his hand under my shirt and I pull away for a moment, pulling off my shirt and tossing it to the ground. The cold air hits my bare skin as I kiss him again and again. My fingers play with the fabric of his pants before I slowly start to pull them down. He freezes at my touch and I stop instantly, pulling away from him. 

“Not yet,” he mumbles. His face is slightly red as he struggles to catch his breath.   
“It doesn’t have to be more than this,” I say. “Whenever you’re ready, okay?”   
He nods. “How did I manage to get you?” He whispers.   
I kiss him gently again. “How did I get so lucky as to find you?” I counter.   
I can see him blushing in the dim light, and it only makes him cuter. I kiss every bruise and faded scar. In time they will fade, but I know he will still remember. I make a promise to myself. These are the last bruises and cuts he’ll ever have.   
“We’re getting out of here,” I tell him. “We’re going to be free.”


	55. I Can See A New Light

As the night goes on, I get more and more anxious. Any second now, we have to be ready to move. I pace back and forth across the room, running my hands through my hair.  
“It’s okay,” Kellin says, from where he’s been watching me for the last hour or so. “Vic, calm down.”  
I nod, trying to force myself to breathe. I can’t stop pacing though, nervous energy filling me. What if it all goes wrong? What if Frank and Gerard got caught? My heart pounds in my chest, my whole body shaking as I pace around the room again. The bed creaks as Kellin walks toward me, grabbing my arm and forcing me to stop.  
“We’re going to be okay,” he says, pressing his forehead against mine. “Really. Everything is going to be okay.” I close my eyes, holding him tighter, forcing myself to breathe. Everything is going to be okay. It all is going to work out just fine. I just have to believe, right?

The alarm blares suddenly, the shrill wail cutting through the silence of the night. I tense, scanning the room. That means Gerard and Frank must have gotten in. Step one was completed. The door should be opening any minute now, releasing us.  
“Now?” Kellin asks.  
I shake my head, my heart racing in my chest. “We can’t get out yet.” The door is still firmly locked. If it doesn’t open, then we are—we will be—  
“Breathe,” Kellin whispers, running his thumb over my hand. “It’s okay.”  
I nod, shakily taking in a deep breath. All I can remember is the last time, the hallway—Jaime—then too much blood.  
“We’re gonna make it,” I whisper. “We’re gonna be okay.” I repeat it over and over again, like a mantra. 

The door swings open suddenly, slamming against the opposite wall, making us both jump. No one’s there, but I know it was Alex. Time to move. I untangle myself from Kellin, taking a deep breath. This is it. We’re leaving. 

“Are you ready to get out of this hell hole?” I ask him.  
“Never been more ready,” he smiles at me.  
“C’mon.” I grab Kellin’s arm, pulling him with me as I step through the doorway.  
We make our way down the hallway as quietly as we can. It’s eerily empty. At any minute, I expect to hear a shout from a guard, but there’s nothing as we make our way toward the front entrance. 

A figure steps from around the corner, his gun aimed at us. Kellin tenses and I push him behind me, ready to fight. My hands spark with flames as I take a step closer. 

But it’s only Jack. He sees me, lowering his gun. “Nice of you to join us,” he calls.  
“Sorry, the door was locked,” I roll my eyes, extinguishing the flames. “Where are you heading to?”  
“Well, the rest of us are heading toward the front. I’m going to help Gerard in the control room. The plan’s in motion.”  
“Got it. How’s it going up there?”  
“We’re fighting,” Jack shrugs. “Nothing much has happened yet. We’re holding our own, but they could definitely use your help.”  
I let out my breath. “Got it.”  
“Vic,” he catches my arm. “We’re going to be okay. We’re getting out of here.”

I can hear the commotion from down the hallway as I pick up my pace, Kellin at my heels as we run out into the front hall. The sound of rapid gunshots echoes throughout the whole building. It seems like every guard is there, fighting against us.  
“Stay here,” I tell Kellin. “Hide, okay?”  
“I can help,” he protests. “If anyone gets injured, I can heal them.”  
“I know you can. Just promise me you’ll stay safe and be careful,” I tilt his chin up, kissing him lightly. “I can’t lose you.” He nods, looking dissatisfied, but I don’t give him a chance to argue before I summon flames into my hands, running toward the guards.

Alex sees me and waves. “About time!” he yells, fighting his way over to us.  
“Someone forgot to unlock our door,” I point out.  
He just shrugs, laughing. “C’mon. We’ve got guards to fight.” With that, the two of plunge into the fray.


	56. Color In The Darker Side Of All My Brightest Hopes

For a moment, I’m on top of the world. Flames crackle around me as I fight, setting the walls ablaze. Alex is right beside me, guards crashing into walls with a flick of his hand as we push forward. We’re trying not to kill anyone—just injure them enough so they’re put out of action. A purple force field glows around us, probably Frank’s—bullets glancing off of it. A brown-haired boy, probably Oli, fights on the other side of the hallway, water and ice levitating in the air behind him. Glee rushes through me as we move forward. We’re winning. We’re actually doing this. 

We just have to hold out, until Jack and Gerard finish with the control room and documents. But I’m not sure if we even need to. The guards are scrambling backward now, realizing that they’re in trouble. We chase after them in pursuit, knocking through their lines. It feels so good to be in power, to be in control for once. We’re not scared, not cowering, not hiding. It’s their turn. 

Alex says something in my ear, something about going to help Gerard. I just nod, watching him go as I keep fighting, covering the position where he just was. 

I lose sight of the others as we charge forward, pressing into the guards’ line. The world becomes a whirl of smoke and flames as I summon the fire, letting it burn. We’re in power for once. We’re the strong ones. 

But it doesn’t last long. 

I hear a shout and see the force field around me shimmer as bullets ping against them, clattering to the ground. New guards are rushing in, lines and lines of them, guns aimed at the five of us. My shield is starting to crack—I can tell the others are too. Frank must be tiring—I am too. It’s exhausting, using our powers for this long. Even with all the training we do, I can tell I’m weakening. 

As if reading my mind, Frank calls out. “Fall back!” We’ve pushed too far into their line—they’re starting to rally around us again. I summon one last burst of energy, fighting out until I’m standing shoulder and shoulder with them. 

“Are you okay?” Kellin calls, running up to us. He’s followed by Jack.   
“Where’s Alex?” Jack asks.   
“He said he was helping Gerard with something,” I pant as I lean against Kellin for support, dark spots dancing in front of my eyes. Frank and the other boy don’t look so good either, standing unsteadily as we watch the guards through Frank’s force field.  
“We’re gonna have to fall back,” Frank says. There’s blood running from his nose—that can’t be good. Kellin notices, immediately slipping over to Frank’s side, grabbing his hand. When he lets go, Frank looks more steady, less pale. He wipes the blood away on his sleeve. “Just keep them at bay, okay?”  
“Great,” the other boy—Oli, says in a heavy British accent.   
I nod, following him, summon fire into the hallway, seeing him do the same with water and ice. I can tell we’re all drained though, our attacks weakening as the guards press forward. Frank’s force field is weakening too. I feel a bullet whiz by my ear, slamming into the wall right behind me as it gets through. 

A hand grabs my shoulder, and I whirl around to see Gerard standing behind me. “Alex was shot,” he gasps.   
Immediately, panic runs through me. “How bad?” I ask.  
“I can help,” Kellin offers.   
Gerard shakes his head. “Jack’s getting him out. We’re getting out of here now.”  
“I thought we were going to destroy the place,” I say.   
“Change of plans. We were ambushed. We need to fall back. Get out to the safe house.”  
“We won’t be able to get through,” I point out. “They have the entrance blocked off. We can’t get to the window, especially if Alex is injured.”  
“We’re leaving out the backway. Just out the back of the Dark Room, remember? It’s behind the padding on the back wall.” I shiver at the words. Gerard notices. “Hey, it will just be for a few moments.”  
“Is everybody else out?” I ask.  
“Almost,” Gerard says. “Just us, Frank and Oli. They’re both exhausted.”  
“Get them out first,” I say. “I’ll stay and hold them off. Tell me when you’re all clear.”  
“I’m staying with you,” Kellin says immediately.   
“No,” I say immediately. “Gerard, get him out of here.”  
“We’re staying together,” Kellin says. “I can help you if you collapse. Anyway, I’m not leaving and you can’t make me.” He does have a point though, but I still detest the idea that he might get hurt. But Frank and Oli need to get out soon—they’re losing energy fast without Kellin to help them.  
Gerard hesitates, then nods, leaving me to fight the guards.


	57. Drown Me In The Flames

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Five chapters left! omg we're almost done. 
> 
> I wrote the last few chapters of this book while listening to All For Us by Labrinth, so if you want to, you can, your choice. I think they go well together.

It’s the hardest I’ve ever worked. My fingertips are numb, the pressure in my skull heightened. Blood is running down my face from my nose, the scarlet leaking all over my shirt, but I’m too focused to wipe it away. All I can smell is the metallic tang, filling my senses. I’m out of breath, gasping as I struggle to keep the flames roaring in front of me. I crouch in the doorframe, spots dancing in front of my vision as I watch the blaze growing, smoke detectors shrieking in the background. Orange and red lick the walls of the hallway, leaving charred streaks. I can see the outline of the guards on the other side as they shoot, aiming for us, but it’s hard to see through the haze of smoke and flames. Kellin squeezes my hand, energy surging through me as he does so. We don’t speak, but he can tell I’m weakening without me saying anything. 

I just need to hold on. Until I get the signal. I can do this. The floor is littered with bullets around us, the walls peppered with tiny holes as they narrowly miss us, each by just a hairbreadth. I just need to keep the guards back, away from us. I need to keep them away from Kellin. I focus on Kellin’s presence, letting him fuel my flames. I concentrate on the way he watches me anxiously, the way he keeps his hand on my shoulder, comforting and recharging me. I think of the way he smiles, the way he tucks his hair behind his ear. I remember how he laughs, the sound that lights up my world. I think of kissing him, the warmth that it gives me like I could burn away forever, a never-ending flame. But most of all, I just focus on him. His presence is always giving me warmth. He’s all that I need to keep going—keep the flames burning in front of us. 

“We’re all clear. We’re heading to the safe house right now,” Gerard says in my mind. I wince, still unused to hearing another voice in my head. “Get out of there. Meet us at the safe house as fast as you can.”  
“Copy that,” I think as loud as I can back at him. Relief floods my body. We’re almost out. Just a little bit further, and we will be free. I turn toward Kellin, a smile on my face despite the exhaustion dragging my body down.  
“Let’s go,” I say out loud. “You ready?” He nods, looking relieved. 

I stand up slowly, wincing as my legs cramp from sitting in an awkward position for this long. I hear a shout from one of the guards, but I don’t give them time to react, clapping my hands together. The sound echoes through the hallway over the crackling of flames as the fire roars higher, creating a wall as it rushes toward the guards. I hear panicked shouts as footsteps thunder down the hallway, away from us as the flames loom closer. 

Kellin smiles at me, and I can’t help but smile back, even through the pain in my head. I grab his hand, and we sprint down the hallway as the bullets fly after us through the flames.


	58. I’d Rather Kill The One Responsible For Falling Stars At Night

“Something is wrong,” I whisper.   
“What?” Kellin asks. I don’t know how to explain it, but staring at the door to the Dark Room, chills run down my spine, a voice whispering _beware _, in the back of my mind. I shake my head. It’s probably just my nerves. Seeing the Dark Room always does this to me. I’m probably overthinking. Still, unease prickles under my skin.  
“Probably nothing,” I say. “Let’s get out of here.”__

__I take a deep breath before I yank open the door, pulling Kellin with me into the Dark Room. We both jump in surprise as the lights flick on. They must have been motioned activated, though that doesn’t quite seem right. In all the times I’ve been here, I’ve never seen the lights in the Dark Room on. Actually, I didn’t even know it had lights._ _

__It’s honestly more disturbing than I thought it would be. Not because of any hideous blood stains or disfigured bodies. Because of how normal it looks. If I didn’t know better, I’d think I’d stumbled upon some sort of training rooms, blue padding layered against the walls. Except for the shackles lying in the center of the room, it looks so normal. Shockingly ordinary. No one would ever expect what has gone on here._ _

__Kellin squeezes my hand once, comforting me as we cross the room. His touch is enough to calm my racing heart as I squeeze his hand back. It’s enough to make me move, heading for the back wall. I try not to look at the chains, a shiver running through me. I spent too many nights here, screaming and struggling. As if guessing what I’m thinking about, Kellin glances over at me, his eyes worried.  
“It’s okay,” he whispers, the sound of his voice soothing me. _ _

__Just like Gerard said, there’s a door wedged beneath the layers of padding. I pry up the blue covering, revealing the handle protruding from the wall. I try the handle. It’s locked._ _

__“Shit,” I mutter, twisting it again.  
“What?” Kellin asks.  
“It’s locked.” My breaths are coming faster, fear clouding my head. I run my hands up and down the door frame, hoping to find a lever or something. It’s not supposed to be locked. Gerard said it wasn’t.   
“What?” Kellin tries it too. “Shit. What do we do?”  
I pound on the door, hoping someone will hear us. There’s no answer. “I can try to melt out through the door. It might be too thick, though.” I give a helpless shrug. This is our only way out. If we can’t get through, then we’ll have to fight our way out through the front. There’s no way we can do that. Not with all the guards. Not in my weakened state. _ _

__The door slams behind us, making us both jump. I rush toward the door, slamming my hands against it as I struggle to open it. No. This can’t be happening. My chest tightens as I struggle to open the door, pounding my fists against it. We’re trapped in the Dark Room. Our precious little time is running out. This can’t be happening. I see the shapes of the guards rushing down the hallway toward us. My flames must have died out. Then how did the door close?_ _

__A shape steps into view, and I back up, pushing Kellin behind me. Mr. Styles stands in the door window, in front of us. My blood runs cold at the sight of him as I back up more, nearly tripping over the chains lying on the ground. No. This isn’t happening right now. He meets my eyes, a strange expression crossing his face—almost anger and betrayal, almost regret. For a moment, none of us move, frozen as we take in each other. Finally, he holds up his hand, and I almost think he waves at me before I see what he’s holding a white switch before he flicks it._ _

__My senses scream as he does so—now I know what they were warning me about. “No!” I scream, diving toward Kellin. The room around us explodes in a burst of beautiful oranges, reds, and grays, the impact of the explosion knocking every thought clean from my mind._ _


	59. Save Yourself, Don’t Ever Look Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhhh last three chapters. We're so close to the end! It's been a wild ride, ngl. 
> 
> This is the tripping on concrete dust chapter. I really don't know why that's how I described it.

I’m thrown backward by the force, my head snapping against the back wall. I dimly wonder if the Kellin is okay as my vision goes in and out of focus around me. My ears ring as I struggle to sit up, gasping as the world tilts sideways, and I slump over onto the concrete blocks, waiting for it to subside. The only thing I can smell is burnt rubber and the metallic tang of blood as I lie there, going in and out of consciousness. 

I don’t know how much time has passed as I lie there, my strength fading away. For a moment, I think I hear a voice. A voice that’s so familiar, one that I haven’t heard in so long. But that can’t be right, unless I’m dead.  
“Vic,” he says. “Vicky, wake up. Ugh, you always were stubborn, weren’t you?”  
I struggle to open my eyes, blinking in confusion as I see Jaime kneeling in front of me, shaking my shoulder. But that can’t be right. I’m not dead, am I? I honestly could be, I wouldn’t be too surprised if I was. I try to speak but I can’t—it’s like my brain is filled with cotton. I struggle to sit up, trying to move, but I can’t. I can’t feel my limbs. I can’t even feel the pain from earlier. Usually, I’d be grateful for it, but right now it terrifies me.  
“Vic, you have to wake up. You can’t stay here,” Jaime says.  
“Jaime?” I finally manage to croak out, my voice scratchy. “Am I dead?”  
“Not yet,” Jaime says. “But you’re dangerously close. You need to open your eyes.”  
I reach over, gingerly placing my hand on his shoulder. To my surprise, I can actually touch him. I pull him closer, wrapping my arms around him. I’ve missed him so much. He feels so familiar, so alive and solid, but something is different. His body is cold, almost chillingly so as I hug him. There’s no warmth, no spark of life, but I don’t care. “How are you here?” I ask, my voice muffled by his shoulder.  
He pulls away, smiling at me, but doesn’t answer my question. “You need to wake up. Promise me, Vic. You need to get out of here. It’s not safe for you, or for Kellin.”  
“I’m sorry,” I say. “Hime, I’m so sorry.”  
He shakes his head, cutting me off. “Don’t be. The only way you can make it up to me is if you get out of here.”  
“Jaime—”  
“Just wake up, Vic. I know you can do it. Just WAKE UP.” 

My eyes fly open in an instant as I sit up, coughing dust from my lungs. My head spins, the world tilting wildly around me. I have to close my eyes, waiting for the dizziness to subside before I can examine the room around me. Jaime’s gone—there’s no trace of him being here. 

“Jaime?” I call out weakly. I can almost imagine his response.  
_“That’s it. Stay awake. You’ve got this. Keep going.”_

Luckily, most of the chunks of ceiling and wall missed me. I brush off the concrete dust, wincing as I climb to my feet, using the section of the wall that’s still standing to push myself upright. The Dark Room is in shambles—the back wall and ceiling collapsed. Surprisingly, the door to the hallway is still standing, along with part of the front wall. But all the blue padding is charred and scorched, dust covering every inch of the ground. I cran my neck, trying to see down the hallway, but there’s no sign of Mr. Styles or any guards. They will probably be here soon, to finish us off. 

I crawl as quickly as I can over to where Kellin is, the concrete scraping up my hands and knees. He’s unconscious as I shake him gently. There’s no sign of burns or marks from the flame—hopefully, I managed to shield him from it. I check him over quickly, but he seems unharmed except for a bruise that’s rapidly swelling in his forehead.  
“Kellin,” I call, shaking him. I press my fingers against his neck, breathing out a sigh of relief as I feel a steady pulse. He’s just unconscious then—not dead. He’s going to be okay, I force myself to think. He’s gonna be fine. He will heal. He’s going to be okay. I repeat the words over and over in my head. 

I slide my arm under him, supporting my weight as I struggle to stand up. My head spins as I do so, and I fall back to my knees, the sharp loose rubble digging into my skin. I let us both slide back into the stones. I’m too unsteady to carry him. Even if I try, we won’t make it very far. Fear pounds through my head. Now what? We’re both stuck here. I can probably get out by myself, but there’s no way in hell I’m leaving him behind. So do I just wait here? Wait until they come and take us both away, locking us back up in the cells—or what’s left of them? That’s if we’re lucky and they don’t kill us right away.

I hear a scuffle and look up to the hole where the ceiling used to be. My eyes widen in surprise as I see Craig appearing on the landing above us, looking down in shock at the wreckage.


	60. Don’t Stop Runnin’ Til You’re Long Gone

“Help us!” I call softly, begging him to. I’m not sure if he can—he’s ten feet above us. If he jumps, he’ll probably break a few bones. But if he doesn’t, we are trapped. I can’t carry Kellin out, unsteady as I am. I can barely keep myself upright, let alone carry someone else. And there’s no way in hell that I’m leaving him. 

Craig hesitates, but he jumps all the same. Alex is still probably near enough since he floats down gently to the ground. The thought worries me. Where are the others? Are they still alive? I haven’t heard anything from Gerard since the hallway. Alex is still alive, if Craig can use his powers. But for how long? We need to hurry. 

“We can get out through the back door,” I pant as I shove some of the blocks out of the way, creating a pathway. The explosion knocked out most of the back wall. I can see a hallway stretching out behind it. We have to hurry—they’ll be coming soon. 

“What happened?” He asks. “I heard the explosion and left my room to see what happened.”  
I shrug. “Something Mr. Styles had waiting for us, I guess. It was an ambush. They trapped us in here.”  
He winces. “I should’ve come earlier,” he mutters.  
“You’ve decided to come with us?” I ask.   
Craig shrugs as he throws a few more blocks aside. “What else am I going to do? This might be the only chance I’ll ever have to get out of here. I was wrong, I have to say. You guys have done a pretty good job. Besides, I can’t just leave you guys here and let them kill you.”  
“Thank you,” I say.   
Craig just shrugs, looking around remorsefully. “I just wish I could’ve helped earlier.”  
“It’s never too late.”  
Kellin is still unconscious, lying with his eyes closed. Craig and I lift him as gently as I can, supporting his weight between it. 

Memories flash through my mind. Of the last time I tried to escape. Jaime carrying me down the hall. Trying to save me. Letting them take him instead.

The hallway is dark. We feel our ways down the walls, not wanting to summon a flame in case we need to fight. We stumble through the hallway, tripping on loose blocks and slipping in the cold water running down the hallway. The path slopes up, but still, we keep going, crawling up the steep floor, doing our best to hurry. I know we’re running out of time, though.

“Stop right there!” A voice calls out, and Craig yanks me down to the ground just as a bullet pings off the wall behind me.   
“Shit,” I mutter. “I thought we’d have more time.”

The three of us crouch on the floor. Kellin’s awake but groggy, the bruise on his forehead healing fast. We crawl toward the exit, ducking as the bullets rain over our heads, pinging against the walls. I blink rapidly as the light floods around us. The cold air hits my skin, the scent of rain hanging in the air, the signs of spring on its way. It’s still dark out, the stars shining overhead, but I can see the shapes of the guards charging toward us from around the building. 

“Can you turn us invisible?” I ask Craig. “If Jack is near enough you can borrow some of his power.”  
“Yeah, but I can’t block the bullets at the same time,” he says. “They’ll just cut us down.”  
I nod, my mind whirling away. We’re not gonna make it. I know that for a fact. Not with the guards closing in on us. There’s no way we can fight our way out. There’s no way the three of us will make it to the trees. And even then, no way all ten of us can get away. They’ll just follow us until they catch us again. There’s no way we’re gonna be able to make it unless….

Though it pains me to think about it, I know what I need to do.


	61. There’s A Million Stars Tonight

Everything clicks into place. I know what I need to do. I know I promised Kellin that we would leave together, but that was a lie. 

I’m not leaving this place. But he is. 

“Get him out of here,” I tell Craig.  
“What about—” he hesitates.  
“Just go! Get yourselves to safety. I’ll hold them off.”  
“I can’t—”  
“Craig, please. If I don’t, they’ll catch all of us.” I know I’m winning because his steady gaze falters. “Just go. I’ll be right behind you.” We both know I’m lying, though.  
“Right behind me,” he repeats. “Vic, I—”  
“Go.” He hesitates before he disappears, taking Kellin with him. I let my gaze linger on the place he just was before I take a deep breath. 

“Hey!” I shout. I summon the fire into my hands, letting it roar around me. It’s never been hard to summon the flames, they’re always there, waiting. The guard let out yelps of surprise as I charge out, letting the fire burn. The more destruction, the better. I spread my hands in front of me, letting everything around me go up in plumes of smoke. Walls of fire rise around me. The bigger threat they see me as, the less attention they’ll pay to the others. I’ll give them enough time for them to escape. I have to. 

For a moment, I catch my breath, staring at the flames roaring around me, crackling as the orange and red streaks toward the still dark sky, the stars gleaming behind. A strange glow surrounds the gray concrete of the facility. For once, there’s color, not just a dull gray. It’s strangely beautiful, I have to admit. The place that’s held me captive for so long is now burning under my power.

“Vic!” I don’t have to turn to know it’s Kellin. I falter for a moment, fear plunging through me. He can’t be here. He’s supposed to be gone by now. He’s supposed to be safe by now. 

But I don’t get a chance to turn because a stinging pain rips through my shoulder, worse than I’ve ever felt before. I grit my teeth to stop from crying out in pain as I make the flames burn brighter, trying to ignore the pain, but it sears through me. It feels like I’m being burned alive from the inside, but that can’t be. I can’t burn. Another bullet rips through my side, followed by the last one entering just below my rib cage, making me scream, the sound cutting through the crackling of flames. The walls of fire around me flicker as I sink to the ground, my blood soaking through my clothes, seeping into the grass. 

Out of the corner of my eye, I can see the guards running toward me, most likely to finish me off, but I don’t try to move. I only stare at the two figures standing near the cover of the trees. 

I meet Craig’s eyes, as he holds Kellin back, even as Kellin fights to free himself, screaming my name. He knows what I’m doing. He knows that it’s the only way that everyone will be safe. I’ve never been more grateful for him that I am now. My heart breaks a little more as my gaze lands on Kellin, and he looks back at me, tears streaming down his cheeks. 

And I know I should look away and make it easier for him, but I don’t. I don’t want to tear my gaze away. I want the last thing I see to be him. Because he’s the only thing that matters. As the guards draw close to me, I let myself smile at Kellin, touching two fingers to my lips in our sign. I love you. Kellin’s eyes widen, and he stares back at me before doing the same. I love you. The footsteps grow closer, and the world spins around me even though I’m already lying down. Through my tears, I see Kellin and Craig shimmer before they disappear, and I finally let myself relax. The guards can do whatever they want to me. I don’t care anymore. 

Kellin’s free, and that’s all that matters. That’s all that matters to me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, you made it to the end! Thank you so much for reading. I really appreciate it. I had a lot of fun writing this and I hope you enjoyed it! 
> 
> Don't panic: it's (gonna be) longer now! (sorry for the bad atl pun i couldn't help it) There's a sequel. It's called Beyond The Sea Blue Light, so check it out! Pro tip: You might want to reread the prologue of this book :)
> 
> see y'all next time! Thanks again!


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